Sleeping Angels
by TheSingingGirl
Summary: Bella has leukaemia. Edward believes he's found his soul mate in Bella. Til death do them part? Or as long as they both shall live? Continuation from lilsparkingauthor, her chapters now posted here too.
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTERS 1-10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter One _

A Ride with an Angel

"Bella honey. Please be careful. I know how rough those airplanes ride can be." Renee, my exocentric, hair-brained mother wrapped her tanned arms around my quivering body. This was the last time we'd be together. I was spending the last couple of weeks I had left with my father Charlie Swan. Her muffled sobs broke through even though she was trying to hide them from me. Cautiously, I pulled her away from me and wrapped her tight in my arms. In our relationship I've always been the mother who was stern and strict; Renee had taken my position as the rebellious teenager willing to try anything. Renee always says I was born a thirty year old and I'd grown older ever since.

I don't think she ever considered the possibility that I wouldn't make it to nineteen years old. I never considered it either to be completely honest. I've always taken the breath I have running through my lungs for granted; I've always acted like it's going to be there forever supporting me. It is true that you don't know what you have until it's taken away.

"I love you mum." Renee was drenched in a floor-length sundress-sleeveless and a deep lime green to coincide with her short, bob length honey-coloured hair-and her fluorescent yellow toenails poked out of a pair of cheap flip-flops with huge sunflowers-white and orange in the centre on each flip-flop strap. Compared to me, she looked and breathed the very essence of summer, of freedom and happiness. Standing next to her in my black jeans, dirty, muddied trainers and brown-fleece jacket I felt like a stick in the mud not worthy of being noticed. Even my long, mahogany hair and mud-coloured eyes clashed and rang out my alabaster face, giving the illusion that I was technically the walking dead, which I technically was.

My leukaemia was discovered just under four months ago by our family doctor Mr Harrison. It's easy to say that he was just as distraught about my condition as Renee and Phil-my step father. Almost instantly I was admitted into hospital while they got a full visual on how far the disease had spread. I fainted when some nurses came to get a biopsy of my bone marrow.

I'll never forget the moment Mr Harrison told me that I had four to five months to live. The actual shock overwhelmed my system and made it impossible for his words to sink in. Renee had sent me to the doctors because I'd complained for a whole week about having bad stomach cramps in my stomach, or should I say I'd tried to suffer in silence but she'd picked up on my out-of-sorts attitude and made the assumption. Sometimes she was the mother in our relationship. Right then, when Mr Harrison told her I was dying; she most certainly was the mother. Phil supported her while she broke down, literally. One of the nurses and a doctor on duty had to help her onto one of the scratchy, cheap sheeted beds while she calmed down.

I'd chosen to spend my time _out_ of the hospital and with my family. For the same reason that's why I'd opted out of chemotherapy. My mother hadn't been very happy about that decision but she'd respected my wishes when I politely informed her that chemo would not work because the cancer had spread too far through my bone. She'd listened to me but she's gone into another mental breakdown.

So here I was; after spending four months roughly with Renee and Phil non-stop I'd decided to visit my estranged father in Forks, Washington. The news of my cancer had shocked him stupid and he'd phoned every night and insisted that either I come down to see him or he'll come up to Phoenix to spend my last few months with me, together as a real family. The idea of my father spending all that money to come down and see me made me feel guilty, so I'd insisted that I'd come down to see him, much to Renee's arguing. It was understandable after all if she didn't want me to leave her sight.

This was the first time we'd so much as spoken about separating, and even now Renee looked like she was itching to board the plane beside me.

"Please honey. We can call Charlie, it's not too late. He can come down here. I don't like the idea of you travelling." As she spoke; I followed her beady gaze to the white plane. It looked pleasant enough, and truthfully I was enjoying the sensation of flying weightlessly through the sky. I'd spent every summer in Forks with Charlie when I was younger, until I'd put my foot down and insisted that he come up here. I honestly wanted to see Forks again one more time. Just once.

The bustling activity around me surrounded my ears and created a fuzzy feeling inside me. It didn't matter that one person was saying her final goodbyes to the ones she loved. I was only one unidentified face in a crowd. No one cared what the tears leaking down my cheeks meant. No one knew why my arms were so thin and bony. No one could possibly know why my skin was so pale and stretched, like rubber across my cheekbones. I kept those secrets locked away for the people who I loved. The world wouldn't stop once I died, Renee and Phil would carry on after mourning, they'd probably have more children; visit my grave regularly in remembrance. It actually hurt a little to consider the fact that my life meant nothing in the grand design. What difference would my death make in the world?

Determined not to let my thoughts intoxicate my tired, aching brain I shut them off and kissed my mother on the cheek, catching a tear that was coming from her left eyelid with the tip of my finger gently.

"You're only wasting your tears mum. There's no way to delay the inevitable." That just made my mother cry harder and before I could comprehend what she was doing; her eyes enveloped me again, harder this time. I'd have bruises later but I didn't mention that fact to my mother, it would only make her feel guilty.

"Goodbye Isabella. I want you to remember that I love you, and that will never change."

"I love you too mum, no matter where I end up, I'll always love you, and Phil." My stepfather was waiting in the convertible outside the airport; the tears were too much for him and I had a sneaking feeling he was hiding so he could cry out the pain and sadness. I'd heard Renee crying every night for the last four months because she didn't want to do it in front of me.

"Platform Nine now boarding." Came a bored voice from the overheard speakers. My mother reflexly tightened her arms on my shoulders, and with a pant of hot breath which went down my neck-making me shiver-she released me completely and took a step back. Then another. Eventually she was two metres away from me, but I couldn't forget the way her arms were twitching to hold me again and never let me go.

"Goodbye mum." I whispered before turning on my heel; ticket in my clammy hand. Huge crowds of people rocketed forward; obviously boarding the same plane as me. Patiently, I let everyone go in front of me and lined up behind the anxious people; some of them were speaking into cell phones, some of them were calling for children and some of them were just checking they had their tickets. The normal sort of actions that people would do when they're leaving their loved ones or returning to them.

My ticket was only one way.

A polite air stewardess glanced at my ticket as I boarded the metal beast that was going to take me to my father. I knew Renee had asked the plane company for some sort of special care in case I had any problems on the plane. I'd heard organise it while I was in the shower, when she thought I couldn't hear her. The surprise therefore was minimal when the air stewardess guided me to wide seat with no one around me except for a young man in the seat furthest from mine, the one near the window.

As soon as we came into view, his hand snapped straight to look-no, appraise me-before he smiled a truly breath-taking grin. A second before he opened his pale, pink lips to introduce himself, stray blonde-almost white-strands of his hair-maybe a fringe of some kind-flopped down to cover his eyes and he swiped it away in annoyance. As he looked into my eyes I noticed his were a remarkable gold, so deep. I could just drown in their depths. His words sounded even prettier, like they were laced in heaven's light and baby's laughter.

"You must be Isabella. My name is Carlisle Cullen." The air stewardess disappeared as soon as Carlisle had spoken with a loose gesture to the seat. Noticing my frozen state, the angel who I was going to be sitting next to frowned and started to rise.

"Would you prefer the window seat? I thought maybe being closer to the isle would make it easier for you if you need to leave in a hurry." No, I didn't want the beautiful angel to move, to feel like I was forcing him to do anything on my behalf; I didn't deserve the attention from such a being. I wondered for a second whether I'd already passed away and gone through the pearly gates of heaven.

So as not to offend the inhuman being I slipped into the seat which had been offered to me and let out a sigh of relief from being off my feet. I'd done too much walking today. Carlisle's frown intensified as he sank back into the patented leather of the plane seat. Somehow Renee had secured a first class seat for my trip so I could be as comfortable as possible. When she had gone into the bathroom I'd phoned the air company and tried to switch it for a 2nd class seat but they'd all been booked and the money was non-refundable.

As I scrutinised Carlisle closer I noticed the designer clothes he was dressed in. A neatly ironed-wrinkle free-beige shirt with causal blue jeans and a light blue tie with even lighter blue stripes diagonally running down it. From this position I couldn't bend over and look at his shoes but I bet they were expensive and leather.

During my examination a voice on the speakers demanded that we put on our seatbelts to prepare for departure and I obliged quickly, not wanting to take my eyes of the angel before me. Carlisle locked his in place with an even more casual ease than the jeans he was wearing. For the next five minutes the air stewardesses went round the whole plane, giving instructions, calming down people who were scared of flying and checking that all the seatbelts were clicked into place. The same woman who'd guided me into the plane came to check on me and Carlisle, and she lingered longer than she should have.

"If you have any trouble Miss Swan, Mr Cullen here is on hand as a doctor. Quite an accomplished one I might add, especially for someone so young." My gaze flashed between the stewardess-her name badge read Mary-and Carlisle, who was nodding at her while keeping his eyes on my face.

"I was given this seat specifically yes; in case you are in need of any medical assistance." Mary nodded her agreement and bustled on with her jobs before going to her part of the plane and buckling in into one of the fold up/down chairs with several holes in the brown leather.

The breath hitched in my throat as the first rounds of movement jutted out from the plane's engine. Heavy panting accompanied my breath as it emerged from my mouth and my heart sped up dramatically as the plane steadily increased its speed as it advanced along the runway. The moment we started to ascend into the sky; all my bodily organs calmed down-my heartbeat slowed down and my breathing returned to normal-the peace of the sky had a numbing effect on the pain that was constantly nagging my body and mind.

The journey-according to Renee-would take about five hours. The wish that it would take longer-a lot longer-came into my mind but I pushed it away. Charlie would be twiddling his thumbs nervously, probably waiting an hour early at the airport in case we arrived earlier than planned. It would be unfair to stay in the sky when my father was waiting for me, especially when our time together was limited.

"So, Isabella..." The steady rocking of the plane began as we evened out-having reached the appropriate distance in the sky-and we were permitted to remove our seatbelts.

"Oh, Bella please." I said kindly; trying to correct him in the politest way possible. He nodded seriously.

"Bella...are you going home to loved ones?"

"I suppose you could say that." Did I want to tell a complete stranger about Charlie? And the responsibility I felt to spend my last few weeks with him. On the other hand, Carlisle looked like an angel; so why in the world couldn't I tell him? What exactly could he do with the information?

"I'm going home to stay with my father. My mother and him separated when I was a baby." I kept my mouth shut so I wouldn't accidently blurt out the fact that I was dying slowly and-rather-painfully. Unloading my troubles on a random stranger; especially a pleasant, charming one like Carlisle was rude and mean. He didn't need to know everything about my life.

However, he had to know something was wrong with me if he was a doctor on hand.

"Do you know about my leukaemia?" The question slipped from my lips like water running from a tap once it has been shut off. Carlisle seemed thrown by the directedness of the sentence but he managed a timid nod as he recovered his expression.

"Yes, I was told that you were into the late stages of leukaemia and may need my assistance at any point along the journey. I was all too happy to help." Well, at least he knew about my leukaemia already, I could not unload something on him when he already knew what it was.

"Well...I wanted to spend some quality with my father before..." The words "before I die" sounded too final and I couldn't force them past my lips. Carlisle seemed to understand the meaning of my sentence and he also seemed to pick up what I couldn't say because he sighed and looked out the frosted window. Rust had claimed the edges, marking them a dusty, rotting red but the actual glass appeared to be like the stuff you'd put in a bathroom. Weren't aeroplanes meant to have proper glass in their windows?

"That is the one thing about the job that I detest. Not being able to help people like you. We know that you're suffering, and we know what it is, but we're defenceless to stop the disease from claiming your lives."

"One day you'll be able to save one of us then, and that will make the rest of our deaths worth it, because once you find a cure no one else will die from it. I'd rather you find the cure later and save people then you rush to find it now and deny those in the future a chance to survive. I don't see why it's fair to choose who lives and who dies. No one can play God." Carlisle shifted slightly in his seat, seemingly uncomfortable. Promptly, I closed my mouth and stopped my rant. Who was I to tell _a doctor_ how to do his job? I'd basically just said the work he did, where he brought people back from the dead with resuscitation and such was him trying to play God, except I hadn't meant that at all.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out that way. I meant..."

"I understand what you meant Bella, don't worry. I'm just slightly...hot." A tone in his voice-hidden well but not completely-alerted me to the fact that he was no doubt lying to me, but why would he lie about being hot?

"Would you like me to turn on the air conditioning?" Already, before I could finish I was reaching up to switch on the AC vent so he wouldn't burn up; and his hand collided with mine when he attempted to help me. Electricity singed between us, electrifying all those tiny nerves cells I had in my whole body, setting them on fire. He claimed to be hot when his skin was the temperature of ice?

I wasn't sure how to address him, sir or Carlisle? Doctor maybe?

"Mr Cullen, you may think you're hot but you're skins colder than mine."

"Don't worry about it Bella. My skin is normally low in temperature, I'm not sure why." Was that a good enough answer for me? What if he was really ill and he just couldn't see it? He's a doctor silly, my brain told me, if there's something wrong with him he'd know. Far from content but seeing common sense, I left the point and sat back silently in my chair, counting the lights that ran down the carpeted isle.

By the time I reached thirty seven, Carlisle interrupted my counting-which was actually quite boring-with another question.

"Did you like Phoenix then?" Eagerly-happy to have something remotely more entertaining than counting lights to do-I turned back to him, gracing him with my full attention.

"I loved the sun. I could always stay out in it for as long as I wanted and I never burned. It's the type of freedom I feel when I'm flying. What about you?" Carlisle seemed surprised that _I'd_ asked _him_ his question in return. It was obvious in his eyes that he didn't really have an answer prepared.

"It's not necessarily the place." He said evenly, "I will go anywhere as long as I can help people overcome diseases. I do not understand why people should die when there is a way to save them. No matter how hard or how expensive that method is." I agreed one hundred percent with that statement. It wasn't fair to play God, as I'd said before but it was anything but wrong to save people when you were given the opportunity. Even bringing them back from the dead when they shouldn't have died, I viewed in my book as responsible and kind. No one truly wants to leave living behind fully. Not even me, even if sometimes I put on a good front.

"So, how long have you been a doctor?" Carlisle chuckled at some sort of private joke he was having with himself before he coughed-probably to try and cover up his laughter-before answering.

"I've been a doctor for about three years. I'm twenty three." That was believable. Carlisle didn't have a single wrinkle on his radiant face, his skin was flawless. The only thing that indicated his age was a solid-gold, gorgeous wedding band on his fourth finger along. My stare must have been pointed enough because Carlisle laughed again, this time not bothering to hide it.

"I know I seem young but I couldn't stand to leave Esme-my wife-alone in the world without leaving a mark stating how we felt towards each other." There was a possessiveness in his voice that I wished a man would use when he referred to me, not counting the way a father would talk about his daughter to the male species on a first date, or a second or third for that matter.

"I'm glad that you didn't let anyone stop you from choosing someone you could be happy with for the rest of your life. Most people wouldn't marry at such a young age because of the gossip factor." I didn't mention that I'd probably be part of those people that wouldn't marry. I knew for a fact that I wouldn't take part in the gossip; I didn't understand the point of making assumptions about people's private lives when they were _private_.

"I didn't realise before how important life is. It's like, before I knew about my leukaemia, there was a distant light in my head warning me that my time here couldn't last forever, and ever since I've been diagnosed it's up close and blinking right in my eyes, if that even makes sense?" Carlisle nodded, a sad, reproachful look in his eyes.

"You can never fully appreciate something until you know it's going to be taken away from you. Life is full of little tricks like that. It's like a test where you're not given the answers." It was amazing just how accurate that statement was. I felt like somehow everyone around me had cheated fate and snook in a peak at the answers to life while I'd played honest. I knew it was wrong of me to think like that but I couldn't help myself. I'd accepted fully that I was dying, and that I'd never come back to Renee and Phil again, at least not living and breathing. It was still hard for me to sit here, in the midst of so many people who took the gift of life for granted. No one understand the significance of life, not like I did now.

"Are you alright Bella?" Carlisle asked in concern when I was silent for more than five minutes, just staring blankly at the stretchy, brown leather on the empty seat in front of me. Was I alright? I was alright in the sense he was seeking when he asked me that question. There was no pain in any part of my body; every system and bone was thankfully numb for once. If he meant was I alright with dying so young, than yes I was alright with that as well. What I wasn't alright with was that no one else seemed to realise what they were taking for granted, and I didn't want anyone to realise what I'd realise in the way I'd realised it.

No one deserved that type of punishment.

"Yes, I'm perfectly fine." My voice was snippy, like an aggravated bear being disturbed from its hibernation. Carlisle was struck silent for a moment; probably wondering whether he should continue this conversation if it was causing me obvious distress.

"Are you sure because you don't sound like it. I'd wager that there is something wrong..."

"Other than the obvious." I interrupted him. It was obvious from the sincere glow in his eyes that he didn't want to hurt my feelings by continuing down the road in this conversation and he shut his mouth and concentrated on staring out the window. Giving me the space I was no doubt shouting that I wanted through my body language.

We travelled in silence for the rest of the trip. Throughout the whole five hours I was contemplating confiding in him, telling him those four words that I didn't dare utter to anyone. Carlisle acted like he already knew how I felt, he was acting like he knew what emotions waged war inside my chest, even though knowing someone's emotions was impossible. Maybe he was extra perceptive because he was a doctor. Didn't you have to be extra vigilant when you were a doctor in case your patients were hiding something? An injury that they didn't want to tell you about or something? Of course, I was no doctor so I didn't know how that kind of thing worked.

The seatbelt light flashed on overhead and I once again obliged to the command and grabbed the piece of plastic in my hands. Carlisle had already done his up before I'd even grabbed the plastic for mine. I knew from the way he was holding his body that he wanted to speak to me, to say something as a final goodbye maybe. The intense pressure to tell him those four words, to let them escape from my chest was almost overwhelming me, but I managed to hang onto a thread of sanity, meaning I kept my whits about me and didn't say anything.

The bumpy descent brought back the bone-crunching, spine-chilling pain into every part of my body, and I worked hard not to cry out in pain. Carlisle wasn't fooled by my feeble attempts.

"Where does it hurt?" He didn't bother asking me if I was alright this time, he just went straight into business. Gradually the pain faded, the grinding of my bones against some sort of other material stopped and I could breath freely again, not easily, far from easily but it was regular again. It took a lot of effort on my part to unstrap my seatbelt and gently prop myself on my feet.

"I'm ok now. It was just the bumpy descent." All around me expensively dressed people were collecting their overhead luggage and chatting with friends as they left the metal vehicle.

"It was nice meeting you Doctor Cullen. Thank you for...you know, being there in case something bad happened to me." I said, holding out a hand for him to shake before I departed to find my father. Carlisle seemed thrown for a moment-to the point I wondered if he'd ever had to shake a hand before-and then he regained his whits and gently shook my hand, his freezing cold skin was soothing against my fever hot hand.

"It was a pleasure." Before he could comment on the temperature of my skin like I'd commented on his I quickly swerved and bobbed to the exit of the plane, managing a futile wave at Carlisle, who was following me after releasing his briefcase from the overhead compartment.

Mary gave me a weary smile as I left the plane and went to meet my father.

Charlie had been ecstatic to see me again; until he'd remembered the reason behind it and then he'd just seemed glum. I could see how this stay was going to be. I knew it was hard for my parents to accept what was happening to me; and I knew it would be no competition if someone offered to give my leukaemia to Renee or Charlie in order to save me. Parents would do anything for their children.

We'd collected my luggage and gone to my father's police cruiser. He's the Chief of Police for Forks, which means he's up at early hours in the morning and he sometimes spends a lot of time after his normal hours in the station, helping out wherever he can. I've already warned him that if he stops helping the people of Forks to spend time with me I'll personally go and drink cyanide just to end everyone's misery. He didn't really react well to that but I think he knew I was kidding.

Charlie's brown, curly hair was shorter than last time I'd seen him and his brown eyes were as deep, with etched lines round the corners as they'd been last summer. His hair line might have been receding a little though, not that I'd tell him that. He was dressed in his uniform, which consisted of a blue button up, short-sleeved shirt, blue trousers, a blue tie and several shiny, silver badges; some even had gold on them. I've never stopped to read what it says on Charlie's badges but I found myself mysteriously wanting to know. My brain wanted me to note everything tiny detail around me.

Like the way the trees swayed in the gentle breeze like dancers on a dance floor; like the way the wind sounded like it was whistling as it collided with the metal of Charlie's car. Grey clouds hung over the whole of Forks, casting a dark, daunting atmosphere which I thought was quite appropriate for me. I was soon going to be in the unknown with no way back. The road was wet as the first drops of splattering rain descended from the heavens and the cracks in the tarmac were the first things to slowly fill as we passed them. Charlie started a conversation just as we stopped at a traffic light on the corner of a bait store for the local fisherman; Charlie was part of that group as well. I wondered vaguely if it would be good to spend some time with Charlie while learning to fish but I decided against it. Fishing has never interested me before, and I was a know danger magnet, so I'd probably hook my lip instead of an actual fish.

"How are you Bells?"

"I'm good Charlie. What about you? How you holding up?" Thankfully, we'd got in the car before the rain started, so I was bone dry.

"I'm doing good considering the circumstances." He told me, trying to act brave and prevent his lip from quivering. Charlie and I both share the fact that we don't like displaying emotion, so I knew he wouldn't cry in front of me no matter how much he wanted to.

"Renee said to say hello." She hadn't said that in so many words but I thought it'd lift the atmosphere if I mentioned something not related to my disease or death. It works in the movies. It worked as well. We spent the rest of the drive talking about Phoenix and how different Forks was going to be. How much colder and soggier. Charlie laughed at my reaction to that and I didn't blame him. The idea of spending time in the wet and cold made me feel slightly nauseas.

We finally pulled up in front of my father's three-bedroomed, white, terraced house. There weren't any lights on inside and Charlie turned of the cruiser and just...sat in the car for a while, waiting for me to say something obviously.

"It hasn't changed." Okay, I wasn't going to be chosen for the smoothest talker but it snapped Charlie out of his trance. Something had snatched my attention when we'd first pulled in; an ancient red/orange truck-the colour of rust-was parked on a slant with brand-new black tyres. Charlie noticed my stare and smiled properly for the first time.

Silently, he brandished a pair of keys from his pocket and put them in my hand, after unclamping the fingers which seemed to have gone into lockdown.

"It's a welcome home present Bells. You need a way to get to school when I'm not around, and you need a way to get back. Plus, I don't think you want your old dad picking you up and taking you home do you?" I have to admit, that predicament didn't seem appealing, but I couldn't believe that Charlie had gone ahead and bought me a _car_! That would have majorly expensive with him and I didn't want to be a bother. Having a lot of money spent on me sort of cancelled down to me being a bother in my book.

"Charlie...you know how I feel about people making a fuss..." My father cut me off with a hand right near my face before I could continue.

"One, this truck was free. I got it from Billy Black, you know, umm...you used to play with his daughters and his son, Jacob Black? Two, I think I should be allowed to spoil you considering you're not going to be with me for long." It was uncanny how he made it sound like I was just going back to Phoenix with Renee and Phil and not dying once my few weeks were up with him.

More than anything I wanted to make him take the truck back, to reverse the trouble he'd put himself through, but I wasn't going to be mean or rude by shunting his gift right away. Letting out a reluctant sigh I nodded at his eager face.

"Fine. As long as it didn't cost you anything."

"Not a dime." He promised, showing me both his hands so I knew he didn't cross his fingers. At that point-knowing he hadn't wasted a whole lot of money on me-I allowed myself a rare, 100% diamond smile and wrapped him tight in my arms. Ever since I've been diagnosed I'm a lot more prone to expressing my emotions. I'm not sure why that is though, maybe my body is slowly shutting down and my emotions are going into overdrive.

Maybe.

Charlie had organised for new bedcovers to be picked up from one of the stores I knew nothing about it. It was actually pretty intricate, with black, velvet flowers placed randomly on silk purple. The pillows followed the same pattern and the sheet was just a bare black; and I was surprised to note that it was already spread out on the bed, and the cover and even the pillowcases were on the duvet ready and waiting for me to fall into them tonight, or in about two hours mean as it was almost nine o'clock at night.

My bedroom was the same as it had ever been. The window was opposite the door, which had a small curtain covering the entrance as well; it was partly see through though with red, green, purple and black swirls and loose patterns covering the silky material. My antique desk; with several large chunks that had been knocked out of it sat in the corner with a second hand computer balancing on the desk. My eyes noticed that all the shelves situated around my room were full of CD's and small ornaments and souvenirs from both my time in Phoenix and my time in Forks. Beside my desk was a dresser, bare on the top except for a cream throw and an assortment of books balancing on top and I carefully started to unpack my clothes into the drawers, even though I knew I'd only fill up one drawer with everything I'd brought. On the other side of the room was my bed in-between two huge boards full of family photos-from when I was little to how I am now-and a little bit further to the right was a mahogany wood wardrobe with pink cherry blossoms edging up the sides and onto the handles. To the left of my bed was a bedside table, which was a light oak with white outlines on the drawer underneath which would probably hold jewellery in dusty, creaky boxes that I'd long forgotten and would not where now even when I was dying. To finish the whole room of, a sheepskin rug was lain down on the plush, cream carpet; and it matched the walls nicely, which were painted a coffee type colour except for one which was painted a deep purple.

"Did you pick up the bedding?" I asked him, running my hands across the silk tenderly as Charlie dropped my other suitcase onto the bed. One of them-the one I'd unpacked-held my clothes for my stay and the other one held my scrapbook-which I was still finishing and mementoes I wanted Charlie to have. I had a plan for how that was going to work out though, each memento was going to come to him in a special way even after I'd died; I'd stolen the idea from Ps I love you, a film I'd watched last night with Renee as a sort of parting gesture.

"Yeah. I picked them up from..." He seemed to search his brain for the woman's name but it obviously slipped past his boundaries because he shrugged his shoulders and changed the subject, "You like purple right?"

"Yeah, purple's cool." I said shortly, sinking down onto the bed, hoping he'd get the hint that I'd like some alone time. Charlie hung around for about a minute-my heart actually went out to him, I knew he had to be uncomfortable but he hung in there-before he left the room, kissing me goodnight on the head before closing the door quietly behind him. I waited until I heard the television click on downstairs-probably some sort of sport-and briefly wondered whether I should set down the first memento for Charlie right now, mean as it was ironic that-from the sounds of it-he was watching a baseball match.

Deciding that yes, it might be a good idea; I gently unclipped the suitcase-which was brown with even browner buckles running across the whole front-Renee bought it for me from England when she went to watch a match at Wimbledon a while ago. Of course, she'd filled the suitcase with souvenirs as well, most of them being clothes and make-up which I wouldn't wear for the life of me.

The contents inside the suitcase would look like junk to anyone else, but to me? They looked like my life, down to the simple objects they were. Not taking time to examine the other things I'd decided to leave to my father; I riffled through the unusual contents until I'd found the baseball glove that Phil had given me when he run his first minor league baseball match. It was his pride and joy; and I was touched that he'd given it to me of all people, the sports repellent person. I appreciated the irony though and I thought Charlie deserved it.

Trying not to catch the squeaky floorboard, which was right near the entrance of my father's bedroom I crept over to his bed and then stopped dead still. Where would I put it for him where he would eventually find it? In the end I pulled his second pillow up and pushed the glove right under until it hit the headboard of the old, stone type king size bed. I let the scarlet covers fall down again and plumped the pillow back up so it suited the intense authority feeling Charlie's room gave me. I guess when you spent your life solving crimes; you got to be a little paranoid.

Thinking about my father's job, I realised that was really all he had left. Me coming back was only a temporary solution. I mean sure, he had company for a couple of weeks but what happened when I was no longer around to keep him company? To cook him meals and cheer along with him during his games? Every summer I'd come to Charlie's house and spent quality time with him. During that time, right then in history I'd hated it. The cold, wet climate of the Olympic Peninsula had made me feel depressed and saddened, like someone had locked me in a cage where the bars kept adjusting their size whenever I approached them so I couldn't break through. Why had I wasted all that time? Charlie was my father; I should have been happy to spend summer with him no matter where he lived. I was just about the worst daughter he could have had, I'd come here but I'd never really been here to spend time with him, to make quality memories. The only thing I'd concentrated on before when I came to visit Charlie was when I could go home again.

It struck me that I'd never classed this place as home, even though Charlie lived here happily. Well, while I was here it was going to truly become my home. That was the last thing I'd give Charlie. Happy that I'd made a decision that I could easily follow through with; I spent the next half an hour perched on the edge of Charlie's king size bed, staring blankly at a piece of red wall while deep in my daydreams. Charlie's bedroom consisted of one red wall and three creamy coloured ones, along with dark, mahogany floorboards, his king-size, stone like bed and a wardrobe. The wardrobe was the same as mine, except the cherry blossoms had been painted over so they blended into the woodwork. Something about Charlie's room was detached and organised, nothing like it should have been. He needed to find someone to help him brighten up his life...and his bedroom.

One other thing I might possibly be able to give Charlie. Another Renee who he could love and care for. Stirring interrupted my hastily forming plans; and I swiftly left Charlie's room, avoiding the squeaky floorboard so he wouldn't know I'd been in his room and I entered mine and shut the door. Ready to act like I'd spent all my time in here. The first footstep on the stairs. Thinking fast I zipped up the second suitcase and opened the wardrobe to put it in the back. Once that was done, Charlie was halfway up the stairs, which left me no time to actually get changed. Did I really want him sitting in here talking to me when all we both wanted was some time alone?

He'd think it was his duty to spend time with me twenty four seven. Renee and Phil had been the same, and I didn't have the heart to tell them that their endless presence was strangling me and choking off my air. Charlie normally wasn't that sort of guy which made the drastic change all the worse. Knowing what I wanted, I pulled back the covers, kicked of my trainers, yanked of my brown jacket and dived into the comfortable mattress fully clothed a second before I whipped the covers right up to my neck.

The walking ceased as Charlie reached the stairs; and I could just imagine his face as he contemplated checking on me. First he'd contemplate whether he wanted to disturb me when I was no doubt asleep; then he'd worry that maybe there was something wrong with me. I heard his anxious footsteps and he stopped a second before he reached my door. I knew he'd go back to the privacy thing right now. He'd wonder whether I'd want some time alone but he'd be split because he'd want to make sure I was safe and well. A second later he knocked on the door tentatively, saying my name through the wood, asking if he could come in.

Did I say come in and prove I was awake? Did I tell him to leave me alone for the night and prove I was awake? Or did I remain silent and hope I had decent acting skills. I went with option number three.

"Bella? Can I come in?" No answer.

"Are you okay?" I felt slightly bad in case he thought something had happened to me. He'll open the door and see you breathing, and sleeping in a minute, that annoying voice in my head chimed. Right on time Charlie edged the door open a crack, peered inside and saw that I was 'asleep,' which was why I hadn't answered his questions. Charlie went to sleep after that in his own room with the door closed so there was only a slight crack visible to let the light in.

I waited for ten minutes until I heard his steady, rhythmic snoring and then I crawled out of bed, grabbed my pyjamas and toiletries and got ready for bed in preparation for the big day tomorrow. Personally, Charlie didn't see the point of me enrolling in Forks High School but I'd insisted, so I'd have something to do all day. Also, under my orders Charlie hadn't told anyone about my condition so no one at school would treat me differently, or so I hoped.

I fell asleep a little past ten, dreaming of angels playing harps on clouds in the heavenly lit sky. Dr Carlisle Cullen's form kept popping up on one of the clouds offering a hand out to me though, and I wasn't sure I could decode the meaning of that dream.

Maybe he was meant to be my guardian angel on Earth.

A/N: Ok, give me some feedback on what you think. Just so you know, all the Cullens are vampires in this. I've already decided that if I continue with this I'm going to write two separate endings because one of my friends wants me to write the ending where Bella dies from leukaemia but I want her to live happily ever after with Edward (take a guess how that'll happen.) Anyone, please review with your opinions and stuff. If I get enough interest in this I'm going to carry it on which means my other fan fictions will be abandoned for a while. Sorry about that. I don't own Twilight (I forget to put it at the start; I hope that doesn't make a difference.) Thank you for reading. Inspired by sad songs, not as depressing as you might originally think.


	2. Chapter 2

******CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Two _

The First Day of Yesterday

Something howled in the distance, and that was what acted as my alarm clock. Personally, I did not care what time it was in the morning, I was up and about with stomach cramps. I determined after that that the faint light coming through my beaded curtain-it was a handcrafted curtain/blind system that Charlie's friend Billy Black made me-it was close to morning, which meant I could get ready for school and pretend everything was normal as I did in the old days.

It took me a full minute to decide whether I was going to go and pick something for breakfast first or whether I'd have a shower, and in the end, I decided on getting my humans moments out the way beforehand.

After showering in refreshingly hot water-my house in Phoenix's was constantly running on cold water because of the heat-I shampooed and conditioned my hair in my favourite scented strawberry products for several long, luxurious minutes. Even the richoeted water droplets condensed eventually though and the shower room became hot and stuffy and the only desire I had was to escape before the steamy, misty air could strangle me. In my haste to run from the bathroom I banged my knee on the metal bar at the side of the bathtub-our shower and bath were part of the same furniture-and I rubbed the spot angrily as it throbbed and pulsed, making the pain known. The doctor had explained to me that because of my leukaemia my body would bruise a lot easier than usual. I hadn't really thought about that at that exact moment. The concept had seemingly far away and impossible. Not so much now.

Taking more time so I did not overstress or over work my aching body I dried off, turbaned my hair in a creamy coloured towel and got dressed into a pair of light blue jeans, a brown t-shirt with a creamy coloured waistcoat and a band of long beads which came just below the buttons that locked my waistcoat against my chest. Not wanting to stay too long in the claustrophobic space, I did not blow dry my hair and I didn't bother to brush it either; the oxygen in the room seemed to be rapidly decreasing faster than I could comprehend.

The purple of my bedcovers and the curtain swinging from my wall to the doorway were reassuring and I hastily made my bed and put the washing in the basket I hadn't noticed last night, which was situated somewhere near my desk next to the threaded wood waste bin. A glance at the small alarm clock-white except for the black of the numbers and the red of the ticking hands-showed me that it was almost seven o'clock. Charlie had told me over the phone when I'd asked him that school began at eight. That meant I had a full hour before I had to leave for _el instituto _(Spanish for school.)

Thinking better of leaving my wet hair to give me the appearance of a drowned rat-I wandered back into the bathroom and dragged my hair dryer with me. While I was untangling the frustrating knot which had somehow appeared out of thin air; the smell of fresh coffee and pancakes reached my nose and made me wrinkle it in wanting. I really was very hungry. No, I commanded my bodily senses. Food will come second. Do things one at a time and keep to a routine. My mouth set in a stubborn line, I spent the next fifteen minutes thoroughly drying my long, brown hair until it gleamed like silk every time the sun from the bathroom mirror-frosted like the one had been on the plane-caught it in its radiant glow.

Once that was done I put my hair accessories back into my bedroom and plopped down onto the edge of my bed while I rolled up my jeans and checked the extent of the damage to my leg from bashing it on the bathtub earlier. Luckily enough for me, I hadn't broken the skin. The only obvious evidence that I'd hurt myself was the ugly, forming bruise the colour of your lips when you're very, very cold that spread about the width of a coaster on my leg. It was unusual though because the pain was reasonably empty, almost like it wanted to be noticed but somehow I was blocking it. I've never accomplished _that_ before.

The sound of something slapping down onto the wooden floor downstairs shocked me out my thoughts and I swiftly collected my schoolbag-which was packed with pens, paper and other school necessities-and rushed down downstairs, skidding on the last step. The railing that runs as a support beam down the side of the stairs is my saviour and I managed to prevent myself from doing a face plant onto the dirty floor. It turns out it was only the mail that came through the rectangular hole in the doorway. Nothing to get excited about.

Sadly my nosedive down the stairs had used up my day's energy, and already my muscles were protesting from their lack of oxygen. With a heartfelt groan, I dropped my half open school bag by the front door, scoped up the mail and wandered into the kitchen, limping slightly because of the bruise rapidly materialising on my leg. Charlie was nowhere to be seen in the entire house but I could feel his presence around me and in the everyday household items that normally would be tidied away in Renee's home. I mean, Charlie's bowl was in the drying rack, left there because he'd obviously been in a hurry to get to work this morning. The fridge door was slightly ajar, which made it easier for me to collect the carton of milk from the bottom of the three shelves fixed into the white, condensed door.

Once I'd settled down at the kitchen table with a bowl of cereal I casually spooned mouthfuls into my eagerly awaiting stomach as I wondered how today would go in school. I've never been the most popular person, not anywhere. In Phoenix, I was never tan enough even though I spent a lot of time in the sun, a lot of time well spent may I say. I could appreciate the irony of something Renee had announced regularly to me as a child; that if I did not put on suntan then I'd get skin cancer. It was unlucky that another type of cancer had claimed my life first. I think she would have liked to prove her statement right.

Ten minutes later I'd washed up my cutlery and replaced it in the cupboards it had come out off, which left me ready to collect my schoolbag and ride to school in my father's welcome home present. He'd left the keys on top of the fireplace so I'd see them straight away so I couldn't delay school by claiming I couldn't find my truck keys, or I could but...no, things would become too complicated for me to handle. With a resigned sigh, I retreated out of the house-locking the front door-and with a quick glance, I found the rusted handle on my rusted Chevy truck and climbed in, thrusting the key into the ignition before I'd so much as closed the driver's door.

The roar that emerged from the engine was deafening, like a lion with a thorn stuck in its paw. Slightly afraid of the contraption now; my schoolbag went onto the passenger's seat while I navigated my way out of the drive and down the road, onto the driveway and into the school parking lot. All in all, the journey was only about three miles, but Charlie knew I couldn't walk or bike that far, not in my _condition. _

A young man with blonde hair and blue eyes was waiting eagerly in the parking lot, prepared to pounce on me when he noticed the new addition to the car park. Most of the vehicles were old, like mine. There was nothing flashy except for a silver Volvo parked right in the corner; and I knew well that in each school there had to be someone willing to show off their posh ride to make the high school normal.

"Hey. You're Isabella Swan right? The new girl?" His voice was deep but squeaky. He sounded like an elephant with the flu. With a meek nod; I climbed out my truck; grabbed my bag and shook his outstretched hand before I took my keys from the ignition and locked up.

"Bella." I corrected him automatically. I hated the name Isabella; I'd always hated the formal edge to the pronunciation of it.

"Well...umm..." Mike seemed thrown on how to continue this conversation and I wasn't really that interested in making friends here. I'd have to leave them in a couple of weeks anyway. It was best not to tie myself down to nice people and actually make real friends when I was going to die and leave them mourning, not that anyone other than family would mourn my passing. I've never been all that social able and it'll show at my funeral.

"Do you know where main office is? I need to sign in." The silence stretching between us was steadily making me uncomfortable, and the way Mike was appraising me with his eyes made me feel like a slab of meat about to be sold to a butcher. Mike jumped at the sour edge in my tone but he didn't comment and simply gestured loosely to a building about two hundred metres away.

It was two storeys high-and it wasn't just the office, it was obviously a library or classrooms or something as well-and there were wide, open windows with lace curtains as pale as my skin blowing in the slight breeze through the open windows and into the open air. From here, I could see someone with loose, ginger hair typing away happily at a computer with a mug of steaming hot tea on her left, which she occasionally stopped to drink.

"Thanks."  
"Anytime, and I mean _anytime._" I didn't like the suggestions behind that statement. Mike made it sound like I'd agreed to go on a date with him or something, which I wouldn't do. It was easy to tell that he was a football jock from a mile away and I just wasn't that kind of girl. If I ever got a chance to go on a first date, I imagined myself going out with a quiet, sweet guy who was just as shy as me. Mike was anything but shy. Even as I watched he wolf-whistled at some girls in _really_ short denim skirts walking into another building to the left. They glanced his way once and then disappeared into the building giggling.

Before he could try something as cocky as whistling at me, I muttered goodbye one final time and headed into the main office to collect my administration papers. The inside of the building was like walking into a fashion magazine office. Half the room was divided into sections, three thirds to be exact, all of which had a separate desk, even though two of them were empty of workers. The third was occupied by the ginger woman I'd seen through the window. The other half of the room held two blank chairs from typical classrooms and a small table with several out-of-date magazines on top. An abandoned cup of cold, sludgy coffee sat on top of them in a plastic cup which was scrunched up slightly. The weak light cast from the hanging lampshade was enough to see by but I wouldn't want to sit in here all day typing and squinting at a computer screen.

As I approached her work station, the ginger woman looked up at me and smiled.

"Hello, dear. How can I help you?" She had laughter lines etched deep into her brow and by the corners of her eyes but other than that, her skin was stretched smooth across her cheekbones, shining a blushing pink. Her eyes were a deep jade which was dulled by amusement and kindness.

"My name's Isabella Swan. I'm new here." Something tweaked in her eyes at the mention of someone new starting in the school and she immediately handed me my schedule, a map of the school-I'd peeked at it first-and a slip which I wasn't too sure about. Sensing the confused sparkle in my eyes, the ginger woman pointed at the slip.

"This needs to be signed by all your teachers and then you bring it back to the office at the end of the day, just so we know you've found your lessons and such. We don't want to be losing our new student now do we?" I shook my head as I dropped the papers-except for the slip-into my schoolbag.

"Thank you Miss..." I realised suddenly that I didn't know the receptionist's name.

"Cope dear. Mrs Cope." Mrs, I should have guessed really. The laughter lines knocked some of the age of her face.

"Thank you Mrs Cope." I amended as I headed towards my first lesson. English.

Mr Berty, my English teacher didn't make me stand up and introduce myself to the class-which was a good thing because I was aching to sit down-and he didn't even stop his lesson as he signed the slip I held out for him. The only free seat was one situated right at the back of the classroom; surrounded by students who were trying to get a good luck at me.

The relief was quite strong though. Surely it would be harder for people to stare and ogle me when I was sitting at the back of the classroom? Well, they apparently managed it because people's eyes were on me the whole lesson.

Mr Berty asked up to read the first two chapters of Wuthering Heights-which wasn't such a problem for me considering I knew the book inside and out. Other books on the reading list Mr Berty gave us were from authors such as Shakespeare, Austin and Bronte. So thankfully I'd read quite a few of them.

Once Mr Berty dismissed the class, a tall, gawky teenager with oil-slick black hair and tanned skin came up to my desk as I was packing away the stationary I'd used that lesson. His smile spelt sleazebag all over and the way his dark, slightly turned up eyes scanned me, I had that creepy sensation of being a slab of meat again. Were all the males in Forks High School like this? I hoped not, otherwise I wouldn't have a first date before my time ran out. I'd rather skip the experience all together.

"Hi. My name's Eric Yorkie. You're Isabella right?"

"Bella." It was like the Mike Newton encounter all over again. Eric seemed to hesitant for a moment, obviously picking up on the reluctant edge to my voice and the way I held myself. Hey, maybe he'd understand that I just wanted to be left alone.

"What have you got next?" Slowly I stretched back into my schoolbag and disjointed my schedule so it was in my hands. Even that small movement jostled my stomach and made me feel sick and achy. My hand clamped down on the edge of my desk to stop the dizziness from making an appearance. Eric didn't notice anything.  
"Government." I said after a minute of fake 'reading.'

"Great, I can show you the way." Oh joy.

Government, Trigonometry and Spanish went ok. The dull throbbing in every part of my body had increased to its peak after spending so long listening, writing and doing active things. I haven't been to school in a very long time; Renee hated the idea of wasting time on schooling when I was dying. I understood where she was coming from. The trigonometry teacher-Mr Varner-was the only facility member who made me stand up front and introduce myself, and once I'd stuttered out the syllables, I'd managed to catch my foot on the strap of someone's school bag. No one had saved me from the hard hit with the floor and I'd spent the rest of the lesson in maximum pain as every joint in my body grinded against each other in protest.

Lunch had come around quickly, for which I was thankful. I wasn't sure how much more 'high school drama' I could take. A girl named Jessica Stanley had introduced herself during Spanish and she'd asked me if I wanted to eat with her and her friends at lunch, an invitation I'd gladly taken because I didn't know anyone else who'd sit with me. Now I was beginning to regret that decision. Jessica had long, wavy brown hair, sparky brown eyes keen for gossip and a very big mouth which she couldn't seem to keep closed. Everywhere we looked, she had an opinion on everything and everyone, and some of those opinions were anything but pleasant.

On the brighter side of things, Jessica zoomed through the lunch queue a lot faster than me when Mike Newton called to us, gesturing seats at his table. Eric Yorkie from my English class was perched on one of the seats as well, looking all too eager to start another conversation with me. It had taken us ten extra minutes to reach Government because Eric had insisted on telling me his life story and that of almost everyone in the school. Apparently, when you went somewhere as small as Forks High School, it really wasn't all that hard to know everything about everyone.

There were too vacant seats-one beside Mike and one beside a pretty girl who I hadn't had the pleasure of meeting yet. It was obvious from the way she held herself that she didn't normally sit with Mike Newton either; and I briefly hoped that maybe she was another shy person like me. I'd rather take that seat beside her. Not that I needed to worry about being stranded beside Mike, Jessica grabbed an apple, a bottle of water and some prepared sandwiches-handed over a crumpled five pound note and didn't even wait for the change as she dived for the seat Mike was nursing like a trophy. The brief disappointment in his expression was evident, but he soon brightened up when Jessica started a conversation with him, flipping her hair in an attempt to increase her flirting.

The hustle and bustle of the canteen was very soothing for my wracked nerves; and silently and slowly-my muscles were still pulled taunt and tired-I selected one of the green, plastic trays and observed the available food in the display counters. It happened just like that. One second the cafeteria was busy and lively, like a watering hole and then silence stretched out eerily. The uncanny edge in my chest made my heart leap ferociously. My brain registered that something had obviously happened; maybe someone had dropped their food over Mike Newton? Or maybe someone had run quickly from the canteen while they'd been in the middle of a conversation? Neither of those options seemed likely however and my mind continued to ponder.

What could make a full canteen grow silent in under three seconds? Honestly, it was the kind of silence where you could hear a pin drop without any physical effort on your part. Cursing myself for being drowned in curiosity like anyone else, I shook away my thoughts and continued to pick out something for lunch. Nothing looked all that appeasing to my rebellious stomach right at this moment but I knew I had to have something to keep up my pitiful strength. It would be so embarrassing if I passed out during Biology, or even worse Gym. The teacher would probably find out about my leukaemia and blurt it out to the whole school. Not such a bright option for me, considering I didn't want anyone to know. Something slammed into me-hard-and almost immediately the jarring sensation in my bones increased and tears budded into my eyes. In no more than a second I'd shouted at myself to regain control and the water had evaporated while I clenched my teeth and tried to ignore the pain. That sort of contact would not have hurt a normal student; I had to remember to act like a normal student so therefore that shouldn't have hurt me, maybe made me irritated but still.

"Sorry. Didn't see you there." A muscular hand crept out from behind me and snatched up the first pre-packaged set of sandwiches-turkey and tuna, interesting combination-to put onto his tray. The arm was ghostly pale; and to contrast the skin a jet-black wristband with a beautiful silver crest-swirling pattern and deep, endless depths-was wrapped tightly onto the wrist and a little above it. Wordlessly I blushed-as I always do-and turned to apologise for getting in his way.

What I saw caught me completely of guard. The man was not on his own. A drop-dead gorgeous blonde was at his side, hanging off his arm with a lunch tray of her own, already loaded down with food I doubted she'd eat, especially if she wanted to keep her figure. Both of them were alabaster pale-kind of like I am now because of my illness-but it seemed more alive on them, which doesn't really make sense I know but that's how it seemed. Startling black eyes-not dark because of a lack of light but coal, beady black eyes-shone out at me and I tried not to stare. The male had dark, cropped hair and strong muscles that bulged through his shirt. My silent state obviously amused him because he seemed to be chortling to himself as he dropped the sandwiches he'd picked onto his tray. The blonde was tall, lean and looked like she'd come right out of a magazine shoot. I wouldn't be surprised if she was a successful model. Her beauty seemed other-worldly, but not in a heavenly way. It seemed more mysterious and cheeky, not like Carlisle's beauty had been.

That's why they seemed familiar to me. Their skin reminded me of the kind doctor who'd spoken to me on the plane and been on standby in case something bad happened. He'd listened as I'd told him about my life and wishes, and about how I felt in this whole situation. I would enjoy meeting that doctor once more before fate deemed it necessary to extract me from the world.

"It's ok. I should have picked something by now, and I'm not the most noticeable of people." The smile I gave him was hesitant, almost like I was waiting to see if he gave me permission to speak to him so freely. It really was unusual how insecure I felt around these two people. The male smiled; his smile was full of promises. Something told me he was the prankster, have fun, charge in head first and consider the consequences never kind of guy.

My leukaemia had done one thing for me. I was no longer scared of _anything_. When you knew the end was coming you didn't leave yourself time to worry about "what if's" and the threats that hung onto any activity. No, I jumped in head first and considered the consequences later if I couldn't avoid them.

"I'm Emmett. This is Rosalie." The blonde scowled at me; and walked away in her silver, platform shoes with _very_ high heels. I doubted I'd even attempt to walk in those shoes and nothing scared me any more. Emmett shot me one last smile as he followed his...his what? Were they dating? Were they brother and sister? I knew nothing about Emmett and Rosalie and I had to keep it that way. How could I afford to make friends when I would be leaving them soon enough? It wouldn't be fair to them.

"Bella." I said into the empty air even after they'd queued up to pay for their lunches. Emmett paid for both and they both headed over to an occupied table in the far left of the canteen. There were already two people perched on the hard chairs that accompanied the metal tables. One was a young girl with spiky, black hair and she was literally bouncing up and down with unexplained excitement. The other was a blonde that seemed to be suffering, he grimaced at everyone, until the little pixie girl looked at him and then his expression melted into happiness and something else...a promise maybe, even though I wasn't sure what he was promising. The two strangers shared the black eyes that burned with wild, intense fire and I couldn't help but understand that they were in some way connected, whether it was by relation or not. Maybe they were all brothers and sister's, even though I didn't think that prospect was very likely.

Sure, the pixie girl and Emmett could be related, and Rosalie and the blonde man could be related. I mean, they had similarities; Rosalie and the blonde guy reminded me even more of Carlisle and the aura of kindness he'd showed me and I scowled at the measly lunch on my tray and spent the next minute concentrating fully on picking food that I'd eat.

In the end, I came up with fruit salad. It wasn't all important and unique but it was healthy and easy to chew and swallow. Once I'd paid, I sank into the seat next to the shy looking girl and examined the people sitting at the eight people table. I knew Mike, Eric and Jessica. I'd seen one of the other girls-she had blonde corn silk hair and fishy green eyes and pale eyebrows-in my Spanish class.

The girl I was sitting next to had finished her lunch already and she had her head buried in a book-Sense and Sensibility-I discovered when she closed it and smiled sweetly at me.

"Hi. I'm Angela Weber; I'm on the school paper."

"Bella Swan. New student." The girl with the fishy green eyes scoffed as she glared freely at me with her hostile eyes. Beside Angela was a smallish boy with black hair and brown eyes and he smiled in a welcome way at me as well.

"Ben Cheney." So I knew five out of the eight people at the table now. Out of the other three people, one of them was male with tanned skin and cropped brown hair and matching eyes. The other two were female, and neither of them so much as glanced at me.

"That's Tyler Crowley, and that's Lauren Mallory." Before Angela could say what was already coming out of her mouth in a question-I could see it-Jessica cut back into the conversation.

"What did you say to Emmet? I've never seen Rosalie look so annoyed." I blinked rapidly, trying to regain my stride. What had I said to Emmett that had offended his sister? Or was she his girlfriend? One of those females who got territorial when another girl even got close?

"He bumped into me and said sorry. I told him it was fine."

"Umm..." Jessica huffed for a moment and picked at the label on her still packaged sandwiches. Mike was watching her fingers curiously, but I didn't miss the way he kept flashing a glance at me when he thought I wasn't looking. Couldn't he see that Jessica liked him? She'd practically sprinted to grab the seat beside him. Sometimes males could be stupid.

"So, what do you think of Forks High School so far Bella?" Angela asked her question that had been on her lips before Jessica interrupted.

"It's different from Phoenix. The weather's so much colder." That was one of the things I missed about Phoenix. The heat. I found it hard to fully understand how it was possible for one place to be so cold and wet constantly. Surely it grew to become too much and people began to long for the sun, for the cries of seagulls hovering over the vast, bleached ocean? For the excited shouts of children running to the ice cream van for a much awaited treat? For the very essence of summer that only warmth and heat could bring?

"You'll get used to it eventually, it grows on you." Angela assured me with a smile as she packed her book away into the school bag. Jessica chose that moment to interrupt in the conversation again-but I couldn't help but wonder whether it was because Mike's eyes and attention were wandering away from her mindless dribble.

"Have you seen anyone you like yet Bella?" Mike, Eric and Tyler all snapped up their heads to look at me with interest. Ben seemed indifferent to my answer. I was glad that one male had retained some sense.

"Not really. I'm not looking for a man in my life right now anyway." I wouldn't have a chance to look for a guy in my life a couple of weeks from now. I only had a limited capacity of time to spend the rest of my life living in, and wasting it on guys who only wanted one thing from me wasn't a way to exit life.

"No one?" Lauren chimed in her bittersweet voice. I could tell that she'd joined the 'talk to Bella and gain attention' bandwagon and I hated the thought that she was only speaking to me because the males round the table would then register her existence properly. It's like I was the shiny new toy and everyone was flocking to flaunt it to their classmates, to prove that they were one step ahead of the competition with the newest thing. I think I liked the idea of being a slab of meat more. At least it was honest.

"No. I think there are more important things." Lauren actually looked at me with a feral look in her eyes that asked me whether I was crazy, that maybe I'd escaped from an asylum and I was hiding out here. Where they'd least expect me to go. How wrong she was. You could say that life was the asylum and I was being given a release soon, except I didn't know what waited for me on the outside. One big, dark mystery.

"Really? Well...don't tell me you don't like _that_!" Lauren appeared to be dribbling at the mouth at someone who had just entered the canteen. Obediently, I spun round in my seat, putting down my fork and looked in the direction her eyes had glued onto. I didn't need to look twice. My eyes were drawn to him like magnets and then they seemed to be stuck on every inch of him like super glue. He was tall, probably about as tall as Charlie, maybe even taller and he had muscles, even though they were less defined that Emmett's. They were obvious under his cotton t-shirt. His bronze hair looked tousled and beautiful, like an actor's fresh out of the dressing room, his skin was the same flawless white and his eyes were same ravenous black. Momentarily he froze in his tracks and shot several glare-like glances in our direction. Neither of them seemed to be directed at me but the hostility behind them was enough to make me feel nauseas. I turned back to my fruit salad and took a mouthful.

Lauren continued to look at me; awaiting an answer and Jessica seemed adamant as well, even though she wasn't looking at me, she was looking at the angel who was currently purchasing his lunch. I knew from experience that it would be a back view, so Jessica was no doubt happy ogling the student's butt.

"Honestly? If he came up to me right now and asked me on a date then I'd probably say no. I'd like to get to know someone first. Sure, he looks like a Greek God but what if he's really mean and shallow?" Lauren shrugged her shoulders.

"Who cares what's on the inside when you can kiss _that_?" She lifted her right arm momentarily and it clattered down onto the table.

"Edward Cullen." Jessica sighed under her breath, seeming to be lost in a world of her own creation. The familiarity struck me harder. Cullen. Could these mysterious pale creatures be related to Doctor Carlisle Cullen? Was it possible I could track the doctor down one more time to say a proper thank you?

"Cullen? Are they related to Doctor Carlisle Cullen?" I hadn't meant to say his name out loud, not so they could all hear but it came out non-the-less and I couldn't take the words back no matter how hard I wished. Jessica and Lauren glanced at me, then at each other and then back at me in mere seconds, questions building in their greedy eyes. Angela-instead of asking questions I didn't want to answer-gave me an explanation instead.

"Yes. The five Cullens-you've met Rosalie and Emmett. The small one is Alice. The blonde's Jasper and the bronze as Jess said is Edward-are all Dr Cullen and Mrs Cullen's foster kids. Rosalie and Jasper are related. Brother and sister."

"Yeah, but they're like...all together. Together, together if you get what I mean." Jessica invaded the explanation and snapped my attention back round to her.

"Rosalie and Emmett are an item, and so are Alice and Jasper."

"What about Edward?" The question slipped my lips before I'd given myself permission to say the three words and Jessica and Lauren seemed happy with the blush creeping onto my cheeks swiftly.

"You're as attracted as we are." Jessica said triumphantly, bouncing on bare air. Then something seemed to pop her bubble because she sighed and folded her arms, pushing her unopened sandwiches away; "He doesn't date though, so you'd be wasting your time." I honestly wasn't planning on confronting the Cullen and asking him to go on my first and last date with me. I had my own motto to stick too.

I could see the future clearly. Angela and I would become quick friends and she'd be heartbroken when I eventually got up the nerve to tell her my days were numbered, because there was no way I would let her think I'd disappeared. Imagine the shock and sadness she'd feel when she got an invitation to my funeral out of the blue. No, if she became a friend to me she deserved to know the truth. I didn't mind not telling Jessica, even though she classed herself as my 'friend' already as she'd said during Spanish.

"He's staring at you." Lauren stopped with the amusing glint in her eyes stone cold dead. Her voice sounded malicious and full of menace, jealousy was surging into the shores of her eyes and voice quickly. Jessica was no better; she frowned as if to think "why would he care about Bella? She's plain. Why won't he pay attention to someone prettier?" I knew those assumptions were correct. Jessica was far prettier than me, and she had a full, healthy life ahead of her if she kept her fitness right and ate to the right diet. Lauren had the same future, and so did everyone sitting at this table.

Appeased; I took another three spoonfuls of my fruit salad before I spun round on my chair for a second time to glance at the Cullen's table. Edward was not the only one staring at me. Emmett-his adopted brother-was smirking at me while Rosalie glared. Alice was still running on bottled excitement and Jasper still appeared to look ill. I hoped he was ok. Edward's eyes narrowed; and from the firm set of his stone lips he was obviously concentrating hard on something.

Jessica scoffed behind me and I heard the crunch as she took a firm bite out of her blood red apple. The very thought of blood made me gag on something in my throat and I coughed wildly; reaching for the bottle of water I'd bought with my fruit salad. Once I'd clamed the fires claiming my veins I let out a deep, refreshed sigh and gulped some more water quickly before the feeling could return when I dropped my barrier.

Angela was watching me as I spun the lid back onto the bottle, as was everyone else on the table.  
"Are you okay Bella? That coughing didn't sound normal." Mike chipped in his opinion on my health, and Eric nodded in agreement but I shook my head.

"Chick's suffer in silence type." Tyler said with a smirk and a wink in my direction. Lauren's hostile glare increased, and I was glad at that moment that look's couldn't kill. I'd be in some bother if her glares held that much power.

"He's still staring at you." Jessica pouted and took another stiff bite out of her apple. I was careful to think of a love heart that time, of romance and midnight strolls down paths and candlelit dinners. Anything romantic and sweet that kept my mind of my illness and other things that make my stomach and throat queasy.

I turned round again to stare at Edward Cullen.

Instead of before, where his expression was merely inquisitive it was annoyed now. Almost like I was keeping a secret he really wanted to know from him and I'd refused to ever tell him. His eyes seemed to hypnotise me and hold me in their brooding depths. The black was oddly trance-like. Almost like I was running in an endless cycle with no beginning and no end. Only running, only the adrenaline and fear of knowing that something was coming up close behind me. That if I stopped running it would catch me and everything would be over. Looking into Edward's eyes was like being dragged into a nightmare that swore never to end. The embrace they held me in was almost painful in an emotional way and I groaned, trying to escape from the endless running and the terror.

The sound obviously shocked Edward-even though he couldn't have possibly heard it; not from far over there-and he blinked and broke away, delving deep into a conversation I couldn't hear with his adopted sister Alice and his adopted brother Jasper. What had just happened? Why were my emotions so wild and unrestrained when he looked at me that way? No male had ever had that effect on me before. Edward was utterly captivating. The shape of his cheekbones, the exact shade of his hair, the way his brow furrowed. Every inch of him was fascinating to me. I longed to hear his voice, as I was sure it would be perfect like the rest of him.

Was he real? For a moment I was persuaded that I'd passed away right in this canteen and gone to heaven or the in-between to find these angels. When I'd said that Carlisle was my guardian angel on Earth, Edward was my guardian anywhere and far between.

I knew for a fact I wasn't dead when the shrill drill of a bell drove heavily through my ears, which meant lunch had come to an end. The thought saddened me. I wanted to spend forever hoping to fall into Edward's eyes. Maybe, when I died, if I went to heaven I would be able to create my own Edward and spend every second of every day with him. Maybe I'd have my angel _right there with me_. That would be paradise.

"Bella?" Angela sounded wary about interrupting me from my thoughts and I quickly snapped back to reality. What was I doing? Daydreaming about dying? There was nothing as morbid as that. I'd know about heaven soon enough, and I'd also know about hell and whatever the afterlife consisted of, it was just a matter of being patient. Wasting time on the inevitable was only going to make me regret not doing things.

Maybe I could speak to my angel. Another thing on my list of things to do could be ticked off. Meet an angel.

"I'm ok. Sorry, I fazed out." Everyone else had scattered; the canteen doors were still swinging but Angela had remained behind to wait for me. Oh, I knew I was going to become quick friends with Angela Weber, and I couldn't bring myself to stay away, even if she was only going to get hurt when I left. What harm could it do to be happy _now_ and not think about the future?

Quickly, I scoped up the last of my fruit salad, downed the last of my water and hurried away with Angela. We didn't have the same lesson-regrettably-but she pointed me in the right direction and gave me her mobile number before she left. The biology lab was easy enough to find, and the space was inviting and open. One huge wall held nothing but windows, stiff and rusty to be exact but still transparent and peaceful. Mr Banner-according to the plaque on his desk-smiled at me and signed my note with the flash of a pen.

While I pushed the paper back into my schoolbag; Mr Banner gestured me forward as he recovered a textbook that had obviously been left over from some past lesson he'd forgotten that he'd taught. To fetch the book, I had to step across a running fan, which blew my hair in all directions-so I quickly smoothed it down and took the book, remembering to thank him as he pointed out the only free seat in the whole of the room.

Which happened to be beside Edward Cullen.

((A/N: I was going to end it here but I decided against it. Ok, I'm trying to channel Twilight but I have to change some things because of the timing, you know, how long Bella's got to live and stuff. Ok, thanks. I'll let you get back to your reading now.))

At first I noticed nothing about his restrained posture, nor did I notice the way his hands were virtually clawing at the under wood of the table. According to Mr Banner, we were cataloguing different specimens and learning to identify them today. Five unlabelled, glass jars were on each bench and Edward gingerly pushed two towards me as he took three for himself. His movements seemed certain, and I got the impression he'd done this before; kind of like me.

Slowly; so as not to make mistakes I flipped through the textbook to certify my first diagnosis, when I was sure I knew what the bluey, greeny stuff was; I wrote it on a piece of appear I took from my notebook and worked on identifying the other one. After five minutes I'd finished the two Edward had slid over to me and I sat back in my stool, brooding over my good work. I didn't notice Edward had completed his work a while ago until he pushed his jars to join mine; accidently catching my clammy skin with his ice-like hand.

Electricity exploded through me, setting every nerve ending on fire. As soon as the contact vanished-quick as a flash-a bucket of freezing cold water descended on all my nerves and extinguished the fires easily. His eyes flashed apologetically but I nervously smiled and aimlessly doodled on the two names I'd picked out from my knowledge at Phoenix.

"My name's Edward Cullen." It seemed to be an immense effort for him to speak to me, and I wondered briefly why. Did I smell?

"You're Bella Swan." Obviously not, I could tell from his face that he didn't distinctly wrinkle his nose at me. No, it seemed to be something stronger, almost like he was resisting something. Or, like I'd thought before he was close to finding out a secret that's been kept from him and he didn't want to rush in and have his chance taken away from him. I wasn't sure where my thoughts got these crazy ideas from. Why would Edward want to know my secret? What was so special about me in the first place?

"How do you know my name?" I blurted out like an idiot.

"Is Bella not your name?" He seemed confused momentarily before I shook my head.

"No. It's just that most people call me Isabella and not the shortened version."

"Do you not like the shortened version?" His voice, when asking me questions I could easily answer took the words right from my lips and made it impossible for me to join my voice with his. How was I meant to compare to a God like Edward?

"No, no, Bella's, good. Yeah." What was it about Edward that left me absolutely speechless? I mean, it couldn't be anything like attraction before I've never been attracted to a boy in my whole life. Not once.

So what was it that made him jump out at me?

"You seemed to have done the exercise before." Edward acknowledged with a simple nod towards the five flasks that had all been identified. As I looked closer, I saw that Edward had written his own findings on a piece of paper in neat, elegant script. It made my writing look scrawny and messy. It kind of explained Edward and I. He was a Greek God with the perfect body, the perfect voice and what I hoped was a great personality and tonnes of character. I on the other hand was painfully average, I was going to die in a couple of weeks and my personality equalled something about the depth and IQ of mud. There really was no reason why he should sit here and talk to _me _of all people when he has that level of physical perfection.

"Yes. I was in advanced placement at my school in Phoenix."

"You're from Phoenix?" The fact seemed to surprise Edward; "I don't understand. Phoenix and Forks are two completely different places. Did you want a change?"

"No." I shook my head. This is where I got into risky territory. I didn't want to lie to Edward but I didn't want to tell him the truth either. I knew from experience what the reaction would be. I'd had that all the way through Phoenix High School when I'd first found out about my condition and I still got the 'careful, breakable' behaviour from my parents. If I told Angela she'd probably become quite protective as well. It seemed like the kind of behaviour she'd display in that kind of situation.

"Then why come to Forks? The wettest place in the continental US?" The answer seemed to intrigue Edward and I played with the idea of keeping it as secret. Hoping against hope that maybe he'd want to dig further into my life to find out. No, I wanted to tell this angel exactly what he was asking for. What was the harm of telling him about my disease? What was he going to do about it? I couldn't imagine he'd spread it round the school like gossip; and I didn't think he'd treat me any differently if I did.

In the end. I settled for sticking as much to the truth as possible but without mentioning my leukaemia. I wasn't ready for anyone to know about that. My father knowing I had a countdown on my minutes was enough, and sometimes it was hard to deal with that.

"My mother's got remarried, and she wanted to go on the road with him. So I packed myself up and moved to Forks to live with my dad. I didn't want to hold back her happiness."

"But now you're unhappy." Edward frowned while I forced a blank expression onto my face. I'd prove to him that I wasn't unhappy, or at least I'd hide it so well he'd thought he was imagining the emotion.

"No. I get to spend some quality time with my dad, meet new people, and have new experiences." Edward didn't seem convinced but he let the topic of conversation go. Mr Banner chose that moment to call the class's attention back to the front; to him and for the next five minutes he explained the properties of each liquid as well as giving its name. We had twenty minutes of the lesson left when he finished so he put on a video on safety in the lab for all of us to ignore, so we could talk instead. Mr Banner didn't seem to mind, and he started marking something at his desk when the conversation started flowing between the students.

"Do you like the rain?" Edward asked suddenly, right out of the blue about five minute into the video. My fingers clamped down on the pen I'd been holding as I doodled and I looked at him blankly like an idiot, not registering what he'd asked me. When the meaning of his sentence finally crashed down on me I considered how I should answer.

"No. The sun is my element." I said finally. Edward nodded, looking like he was deep in thought and far away from me. He still held his rigid position at the desk; his fingers still curled on the under wood of the table but his voice was friendly when he spoke to me, and encouraging as well. Almost like he wanted me to talk to him, to distract him. What could I be distracting him from though?

There was nothing else going on in the room that he'd need to hide from.

"What about you?" From the way his eyes widened he obviously hadn't considered the fact that I'd ask him his question back, even though I wanted to be polite. His voice was exactly as I'd predicted. It was perfect and velvety. As sweet as nectar dripping honey.

"I prefer the rain. A lot of things come out when the clouds are cast over the sun." I wasn't sure exactly what that meant but I assumed he was talking about wildlife and plants and things. So, Edward Cullen was a nature lover. I personally did what I could to help the environment but I never made a habit of going out of my way to do things that weren't required off me. Recycling, not using my car when I could walk and things like that.

"But some of those things are scared of the sun. Which could make them dangerous. What kind of creatures don't like basking in the sunlight?"

"Sharks." Edward said shortly.

"And sharks aren't all that nice."  
"Sharks are as beautiful as all of mankind's creatures."  
"Until one of them is chomping on your leg." I huffed, still doodling on my notebook page. We had another five minutes before lesson was up. I have to admit, Edward chuckled under his breath at that statement and he admitted that it was true.

"You're a mystery Bella Swan." He suddenly blurted out; smirking to himself even as the words escaped his beautifully chiselled mouth. From the distant look in his eyes he obviously didn't realise that he'd said it out loud, but I still felt the need to reply.

"And so are you Edward Cullen." I told him, smiling back. I haven't felt so free when speaking to a male before, especially not a teenage male. Maybe there's a friendship waiting to be taken up with Edward Cullen as well. If I play my cards right the Greek God could be my _friend_, not that I'd expect anyone as perfect as him to take an interest in me.

Before I could open my mouth and start another conversation with Edward, on a topic of my choosing this time the bell rang and Mr Banner dismissed us all. Before I could so much as blink-or before my heart could beat once more Edward had climbed up from his seat; strapped his bag over his shoulder and then he was a blur as he disappeared out the doorway faster than I ever thought possible.

Maybe he didn't want to be friends after all.

A/N: Please review and tell me what you think. I added some here so we could have some Edward/Bella interaction even if it isn't exactly what we want yet. The good fluff will come soon I promise. If you have any questions about this fan fiction please feel free to ask me in a pm or in a review. I don't own Twilight, the amazing Stephanie Meyer does and she's lucky.


	3. Chapter 3

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Three _

Fate Has a Funny Sense of Humour

Gym was painful.

The coach -Coach Clapp- ordered us to play badminton for the whole lesson once we'd changed into our gym kits. The kits were traditional school wear; consisting of a white shirt and a navy pair of shorts that didn't suit my washed out frame in the slightest. I got several funny looks from the girls in the changing room because of the way my ribs stuck out from my chest-another side effect of the leukaemia-but I ignored their eyes and stuck to the task at hand. One thing at a time. That way I could easily stick to a routine.

Throughout the hour I managed to hit three people in the backs of their heads with my racket instead of the shuttle cock and then, one minute before the couch would allow us to pack away the equipment and go and get changed; I managed to miracously change the direction my racket was heading in and it hit _me _on the head. The pain after that was immense. I found it was a lot harder to hide the pain from my expression-as it emerged through the creases of my eyes and the frown-like way I held the corners of my mouth down-with an audience.

I recognised some of the students asking me if I was alright but most of the faces were strange blurs. Somehow I'd managed to remain steadily on my feet; even if I was swaying slightly. Mike was the nearest person to me and he was panting over me like a golden retriever.

"Are you alright Bella?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine." I would never forgive myself if I blew the secret about my disease to someone like Mike- I knew he'd be the kind of person who'd spread the gossip round the school. He reminded me of a male version of Jessica or Lauren. Mike would be a match made in heaven for either of those two. Somehow though, I was pretty certain Lauren only had eyes for Tyler; the tanned boy who'd spoken earlier to me in the canteen.

"Are you sure? You look like a kicked dog." Mike definitely had no charm with the ladies. Should I warn him not to mention that comment to someone like Jessica? She'd probably slap him so hard his head would fall off.  
"I'm really fine Mike. But just some advice, telling a girl she looks like a kicked dog isn't exactly polite, and I'll let you in on a little secret, none of us like it."

"Oh right." He had the decency to look embarrassed; as people from all directions around us were attempting to stifle laughter. Surely you had to be a pretty dense male if you didn't realise calling a female a 'kicked dog' would offend her in the slightest. His words had even made a fire sizzle in my stomach.

Before Mike could come up with something equally as rude and upsetting; I retreated into the changing rooms and located my peg before gingerly picking up my brown t-shirt and jeans. Once I'd stripped of my top and short I put on my normal school clothes, fastened the waistcoat once I'd pushed my arms through the holes and replaced the beads round my neck and the pumps on my feet. Just as I was adjusting the strap on my schoolbag so it fit nicely into my waist, the rest of the girls came flooding in –deep in conversation- in huge, divided crowds.

Rather than face the gossip which would no doubt be spreading round the changing room –the best place to spread rumours was in changing rooms, whether they be male or female- I bailed from the room and headed outside. As soon as the chilly air –it felt colder than the Arctic- hit me I shivered violently. I really should have thought to bring a jacket. How stupid could I be? This wasn't Phoenix and I wasn't in the sun any more. The cold weather was something I had to get used too. Just as I thought this –heavy droplets of murky rain splattered down from the grey, overcast sky. One landed squarely on my nose, making me sneeze for a moment before I remembered to shelter somewhere. Mr Harrison had told me over and over again that my immune system would be non-existent, which meant if I caught something as small as a cold it could kill me if it developed into something further. Standing in the rain like an idiot would accomplish that mission.

But I wasn't ready to die yet. Charlie still needed his mementoes and I wanted to spend some quality time with my father. I owed him that much before I left him alone in the world again.

"Bella." A female voice greeted me as I joined the huddle of students taking cover in the entrance to main reception. I recognised all these students. One was Lauren, one was Tyler and the other two were Angela and Ben. Favouring the gentler two, I squeezed into the space in the very corner, beside Angela.

"Hello guys." My voice sounded withered, like a crumpled flower but I didn't mind. I could blame its tenor on the rain and morbid weather. The overcast clouds depressed me no end. Would it hurt Forks to have one rare, sunny day before I had to leave again? It would be a miracle in itself.

"Are you okay? That hit in gym seemed painful." Angela sounded really worried; like I'd drop down onto the floor unconsciousness. Did I really look that worn out? And here I was hoping I'd managed to hide that fact.

"I'm good Angela, really. I just have a slight headache." It was best if I confessed to something so my lies would seem authentic. Angela was more likely to believe I was ok if I admitted I felt a bit groggy than if I promised her I was 'peachy keen.' Which I most certainly wasn't.

"I have some painkillers in my schoolbag." Angela volunteered, already reaching into her backpack, which she'd took of her shoulder.

"No, really. I'm ok." I protested. The doctor had told me that my immune system was broken; and taking unnecessary medication wasn't going to help it at this moment in time.

"I'll have some when I get home." The box of painkillers lingered in Angela's hand for several minutes before she finally sighed and packed it away again. Lauren and Tyler were three feet deep in a conversation I didn't want a part off and Ben was studying an English book-Wuthering Heights by the looks of it-and from the scrunched up expression on his face he wasn't enjoying it all that much.

Now that I thought about it, I might have seen Ben in my English class this morning. Maybe I could offer to give him some help or some study notes if he didn't want to read the book.

"I'm going to make a run for it. I want to get home." Ben suddenly piped up; putting the book back into his back as he judged the distance to the parking lot.

"I agree with you." Angela said shortly, removing an umbrella from her backpack. Now why didn't I think of bringing one of those? Noting my disgusted-because I'd forgotten a jacket and/or an umbrella-stare Angela smiled and when she opened the material shelter; she put half over me.

"Which car's yours?"

"The Chevy truck." Ben was a step behind us, taking cover under the umbrella also; Angela didn't seem to mind though. We went over to my truck first and Angela didn't move away until I was inside the cab with the driver's door closed. Before she could disappear, I rolled down the squeaky window with a lot of effort and stuck my head out.  
"Thanks Angela."

"You're welcome." She said with a radiant smile which flipped down into a frown, "Now, if I were I'd roll up that window and crank the heater full blast. Wouldn't want you getting a cold or something." What did Angela mean by that? Did she know about my leukaemia? A slight burst of panic richoeted through my veins but I forced my heart to calm down its rapid beating. Angela probably meant she didn't want me getting ill in general, mean as it would mean I'd miss days off school and such. It was what friends said to each other, and Angela struck me as a caring sort of person anyway.

"Thanks, you too Angela. See you both tomorrow." Both of them waved as I wound up the glass window and cranked up the heater just as Angela had suggested. Almost immediately I felt my breathing ease up and I let out a deep sigh of relief.

After replacing my backpack on the passenger seat I drove home and started preparing Charlie's tea. While it sizzled on the oven I went upstairs and did my homework, spending the most time on my trigonometry, which was really difficult. Charlie's police cruiser pulled up at about six and I skidded down the stairs in a mere rush because I'd forgotten all about serving his dinner while I'd been caught up in my maths problems.

My father seemed surprised to have dinner waiting for him on the table but he sank down into his wooden oak chair and picked up his fork to shovel the spaghetti bolognese into his mouth. After pouring us both glasses of water, I took a seat opposite him and took several tentative mouthfuls of the spicy food I'd prepared. The food itself was for Charlie's benefit more than mine. Ever since the truth had come out about my leukaemia I didn't eat that much, which was why I was so skinny. In a way, my body was already shutting down, so the nutrients in my food were being rejected which is one reason why I had hardly any energy. Charlie was a good sport though, and he didn't comment when I ended up shovelled three quarters of my meal into the bin. My glass of water was refilled three times however because my lips were cracked and drying, which-according to Mr Harrison-meant I should drink as much water as possible without overcharging myself.

Once I'd washed up our plates and glasses and Charlie had packed them away so I could note where everything was for future reference, we sank down onto the couch beside each other, wondering what to do next.

"What do you want to do tonight Bells?" It was a Monday, which meant I had four more days of school before I had a free weekend. I'd been considering an idea for the weekend but I wasn't sure I wanted to do anything tonight because of the jet lag from the travelling.

"I don't think I'm up to anything tonight Charlie, but I was thinking maybe we could go down to La Push at the weekend to see Billy?" Charlie seemed delighted with that idea.

"I can take my fishing stuff down and we can give teaching you another try." I didn't have the heart to tell Charlie I'd rather not get anywhere near a large expanse of water or a fishing rod. I'd probably have my eye out with the thing. However, this was my father's time and it was up to him how he spent it, so I relented and nodded.

"I'd like that dad. We can reminisce the good old times with Billy and Jacob." I hoped I'd gotten his name right. Jacob was two years younger than me and we'd played together while Billy and Charlie had gone fishing when I was younger. We'd had some funny and bizarre times and I was quite looking forward to meeting Jake again. Maybe his sisters would be there as well.

A goodbye would be nice.

"Ok, who are you and what have you done with my Bella?" I looked at my father in confusion. His expression slowly stretched into a smile.

"What do you mean?" I finally ventured, shifting slightly. By now, usually Charlie would have turned the television on to some sort of sports channel. It was quite unnerving having the box switched off.

"One, you _want _to go fishing with me. Two, you want to reminisce old times and three you called me 'dad' instead of Charlie." I have to admit, I understood why my father was smiling like that now. It must seem like a complete stranger had taken residence up inside his daughter's body as the disease run its course.

"I'm sorry Charlie. I just...want to give you whatever you want so I'm not..." How did I explain to him what I wanted him to know? How could I tell him that I'd do whatever he wanted because I owed him that much? I was abandoning him to death and I wasn't even trying to stop it from happening. The least I could do for Charlie was to leave him with some of the memories he'd never had from me.

"It's ok Bells. I know what you're trying to say, and I just want to say...I'll be happy doing whatever you want to do. It doesn't matter _what_ we do, as long as we get to spend the time together." I have to admit, that got a hesitant smile from me.

"Then what do you say we watch a baseball match?" Charlie seemed unsure for a while, and then he smirked and reached behind the couch to pull something brown and matted out. Once it was in the light, I could see it was the baseball glove I'd slipped under Charlie's pillow last night. He slipped it onto his hand and met my eyes. There was a sparkle in his that I could swear was water threatening to escape his tear buds.

"Thank you for the glove."  
"I thought it'd be something for you to remember me by." I said lamely. Somehow, I hadn't been counting on Charlie finding the glove until after I'd died. It wasn't much of a message from beyond the grave when I wasn't even dead yet.

On the other hand, I think Charlie would rather find these mementoes while I was still alive, maybe just to say thank you.

I know that's what I'd want.

The following morning was silent as I arrived at school. Charlie had been leaving just as I'd woken up and come downstairs so I'd managed to say goodbye to him before he'd left for the day. Something about that fact made me feel slightly better. I knew Mr Harrison had given me a couple more weeks but somehow I felt like it was better to be safe than sorry, and I'd be very sorry if I didn't tell Charlie I loved him at least once everyday before I died.

However, waking up early gave me an opportunity to shower, dress and eat with thirty minutes left to spare, so I'd hopped in my truck-figuratively speaking of course, I couldn't hop anywhere, it was hard enough to walk-and decided to get to school earlier than was required.

It had almost snowed last night, so the streets were incredibly icy and so was the parking lot once I arrived and pulled into a spot near the front of the school. The lesser the distance I had to walk, the more energy I'd have for the day. Unsure of what to do now for twenty five minutes I took out my Wuthering Heights book and lost myself in the pages, having completed all my homework last night.

Gradually the parking lot filled up and the minutes ticked on. After I'd got about halfway through my book I ear-wigged my page and grabbed my backpack, forcing my book back inside as I locked up my truck. It was strangely quiet in the surrounding lot, which I found mildly suspicious considering that yesterday it had been the margin of activity. Mike Newton and the other students-excluding Tyler- I'd sat with at the lunch yesterday were crowded outside the school entrance, staring stupidly towards me.

Why were they looking at me like that? Confused, I spun on my heel...to come face to face with Angela, who was racing up to me-slipping occasionally-while slipping her gloves onto her blue hands. Why did Mike and the others seem so surprised that Angela would want to come and talk to me?

The sound of a protesting engine invaded my senses brutally and then I saw it. Everything froze in slow-motion. A blue van was skidding towards us, blaring its horn in warning. It would be impossible to avoid it now; it was mere seconds away. The driver was frantically gesturing through the glass windscreen, demanding we move out the way but Angela and I acknowledged at the same time that it would be too late to run away.

Angela's gloves fell through her quivering hands on to the ice covered ground as the van covered the last metre towards us. I might be in the shooting line but Angela was right in the centre. If I was a fully healthy person I might even have been capable of surviving this accident. A blur of colour slammed into both me and Angela from behind and knocked us both down onto our knees. Seconds later; Edward Cullen was perched beside us with his hands outstretched in front of him.

What had he accomplished? Another dead body. Angela's head lolled to one side beside me and her eyes were squarely closed. As a touched her hand it was stone cold but I felt her heart beating merrily away, racing right out of her ribcage. She might be unconscious but her body knew we were still in danger. While my eyes were glued to Angela the sound of squeaking metal assaulted my ears and the blue van collided. The impact wasn't nearly as painful as I'd originally thought. In fact, there was no pain at all, if anything it was peaceful, quick.

Until I opened my eyes and realised the van had never touched us. Somehow Edward's arms had stopped its progress, forcing it to a stop. There was a mild dent in the back bumper of my Chevy but that was it. No other damage anywhere. The sounds of rumbling footsteps caught my ears and then one head was popping up over the bonnet of Tyler's van. Then another. Edward, Angela and I were trapped in-between the two vehicles and I could see into the driver's cab of Tyler's van; he was bleeding and unconscious. Help had to be coming soon, I wasn't sure how bad Tyler's injuries were and Angela was worrying me. Had she hit her head on the way down to the floor?

"Bella, are you ok?" Edward's voice snapped me back to reality. My eyes roamed him, searching for injuries, and I was thankful when he came up blank. There was something about Edward that made me feel extremely protective of him. I wasn't sure I'd be too happy if he ended up hurt in this accident.

"I'm fine. You?"  
"I'm okay. What about..." Edward squinted his eyes like he was trying to recall something. I filled him in, thinking that he was trying to come up with a name for Angela.

"Angela?" His eyes met mine and he nodded uneasily, glancing down at the unconscious girl balancing in my arms.  
"I don't know. She's unconscious."

"Hold on children. The police and medical services have been called." Mrs Cope's voice came through to us and her head appeared above the many gazing down at us. Today her ginger hair was piled up in a bun held together by two chopsticks with white markings on the black wood and a pair of brown framed glasses balanced on her nose; each end secured by string which wrapped round her throat.

The passenger door of Tyler's door was opened and his unconscious, groaning body was removed from the vehicle by Mr Varner and Coach Clapp. Mrs Cope was the only female member of staff who was present at the moment and she kept up a conversation with us, mostly consisting of questions about what had just happened. At some point in time, Angela moaned softly under her breath and opened her eyes for a fleeting moment before she fell into unconsciousness again.

When the ambulance finally pulled up I already knew there was going to be an unnecessary fuss made over me. True to my thoughts, the paramedics-as soon as the van had been removed from the scene-swarmed in like angry bees and Angela was taken from my grip and placed on a stretcher while men in fluorescent suits checked her vitals and injected her with all sorts of chemicals. Once Angela and Tyler had been taken care off, the paramedics seemed to remember that two more students had been involved in the collision and they descended on us.

Edward shook of their questions and insistent orders with an easy, cat-like ease, and he managed to manoeuvre it so he could ride to the hospital in the back of the ambulance I was placed in, unluckily enough for me, on a stretcher. Apparently I looked ill. It was hard to point out that this was me on a good day because of my leukaemia when a class mate was sharing the ambulance.

Angela and Tyler were wheeled into the hospital ahead of Edward and I because there was actually blood in their cases, well, in Tyler's case. His windscreen had been crushed into miniscule pieces on impact and the glass had attacked his tanned face, imprinting itself into his smooth skin. When I was eventually taken from the ambulance, I was guided in another direction to some sort of cubicle in a hospital room full of other causalities. Edward disappeared somewhere along the line; and he didn't turn up again.

Four hours later someone finally remembered I was sitting twiddling my thumbs because a young woman with honey-coloured hair and remarkably tanned skin did a quick examination and dismissed me, claiming that I was 'fit as a fiddle.' She didn't even know that I had leukaemia, you could tell she hadn't consulted my medical files by the way she spoke to me. However I wasn't about to tell her that and I made my escape thankfully. As soon as I was released; I ran straight into my father, who was still in his police uniform with a forgotten cup of cold coffee in his hand.

"Bella." He sounded immensely relieved; "Are you ok? We got a call this morning to the department claiming four students had been involved in a collision. I almost fainted when they said your name."

"I'm fine dad. Don't worry about me. I think Angela and Tyler got the worst of the injuries."

"Angela Weber?" Charlie sounded disappointed, "Nice girl." He commented, "Its unfair how these things work really. Fate seems to be picking on the wrong people. First you then Angela. Who next?"

"I know what you mean dad. Angela's one of the nicest people I've ever met."

"Umm..." Charlie left whatever he was going to say unfinished when Edward came barrelling towards me; having had his own medical examination hours ago. No doubt by his father. I found it impossible to believe now that Carlisle Cullen and Edward Cullen were not related. There wasn't enough chance in the world for that.

"Bella. I thought I'd missed you." Once he drew level with Charlie and I Edward picked up the tense atmosphere in a second.

"I was just going to ask if you wanted a ride back to school. My sister brought the Volvo here to bring me back to school."

"It's ok. I can take my daughter back to school." Charlie sounded sore, but I knew for a fact that Charlie had better things to be doing, like running Forks Police Station. I wasn't going to let him put everything on hold because of me.

"It's ok dad. I know you have police business to attend to. You do run the police station after all." Charlie seemed too hesitant. It would be helpful if someone else helped me get to school, but on the other hand, Charlie thought of himself as my father and with my leukaemia he didn't want to trust anyone else with my safety, this morning wouldn't have helped that.

"No. I think I should make sure my daughter gets to school safely."

"Dad, I swear I'll be fine. Edward's a friend." Charlie hesitated for a moment and then, all of a sudden, he just gave in.

"Fine. I'll see you back at the house tonight kiddo."

"Love you dad." I said, waving him away slowly.

"Love you more Bells." He whispered back in half a voice as he left the hospital waiting room. Edward obviously hadn't heard the conversation because he was being subjected to an interrogation by Mrs Weber, the local bank lady. As I studied from a distance, the best I could determine was that Mrs Weber wanted to know why she hadn't been allowed to see her daughter yet. Edward was politely explaining to her that there was a procedure the hospital had to stick to and that his father was the one personally attending to her children.

Once that conversation was finished, Edward was released and he gestured for me to follow him outside to the parking lot, where- true to his word-his silver Volvo sat with his little sister Alice leaning against the driver's door, juggling the car keys in-between her grip.

"Thank you Alice." Edward said politely.

"You're welcome." She said distractedly, not even giving him an ounce of concentration, no, that was all focused absolutely on me.

"So Bella...it's Bella right?" Her tone implied that she already knew she was right but she wanted to be polite by asking me. I managed a mute nod. She slid into the backseat, freeing up the passenger seat for my use. An airplane crossed overhead, sounding like a wounded animal as the engines made a roaring sound. Awkwardly, I hung outside the driver's door. It wasn't fair if I took the passenger side of the car when Alice was so obviously more suited to it.

"No, umm...Alice, you can sit in the front seat. I don't mind the back." She obviously didn't hear me though, so I let out a small, strangled sigh and rounded the Volvo, opening the shotgun door. The inside of the Volvo was kept perfectly clean. There wasn't a single stray sweet wrapper or an empty soda cup hidden away under the seats. Somehow, the car still had the ''new car'' smell that was only possible to get when you'd just bought a new car.

As soon as I'd clipped my seatbelt into the plastic holder Edward turned the key in the ignition and the car shot away from the curb like a bullet from the barrel of a gun. Throughout the journey, Edward's back muscles didn't tense down for a single second; and with the one glance I braved towards Alice, it was easy to see that she was doing something or other that annoyed her brother. Of course, it had to be something silent or extremely quiet because otherwise I'd have heard.

About halfway back to the school Alice coughed to clear her throat and Edward finally snapped.

"Alice, can you please keep your opinions to yourself?" What on earth was Edward talking about? Alice hadn't said anything. Alice stared blankly at him for a few moments before opening her dainty mouth and speaking my thoughts.

"I didn't say anything Edward." Subtly, Alice glanced in my direction before continuing the conversation-sending it in a completely different direction.

"So Bella…are you going to the junior prom?" Considering the junior prom was a couple of months away and I only had a couple of weeks left to live I could safely say I wouldn't be attending that event. Not that I'd miss that particular oppurtunity; dancing had never been my strongest point.

"No. I'm not going to be around then." Alice looked at me strangely while Edward took his eyes of the road, also looking at me.

"Why not?" Ok, I was trying to stick to the truth as much as possible without outright telling them I was going to die.

"I've got to go back home. I'm only here temporarily. Charlie wanted some company." That was basically the truth. I did have to go back home; back to my home in the sky where I'd see my grandparents again and everyone I'd lost in my life. And I was also only here temporarily mean as I was going to die soon and I'd only come to Forks to say goodbye to my father before the end overwhelmed me.

"So, you're only visiting Forks?" Alice seemed confused and disappointed at the same time and I wondered how I'd managed to offend her. Why would it matter to her if I was going to be here for the prom or not?

"Are you going?" It was only polite to ask her the same question mean as she'd shown enough interest to ask me. Alice seemed delighted and she started to vigorously shake her head in a 'yes.'

"Yes. I've got the tickets, I found the perfect dress and I've got the perfect date." She giggled slightly at the last comment and I remembered the words that had been spoken at the lunch table, about all the Cullens being together. Doctor Cullen; according to one rumour performed plastic surgery on all his children to make them look so pale and perfect, but I didn't believe a word of it. The man I'd met on the plane seemed like an angel, and so did the other Cullens.

Maybe they'd fallen to Earth to be guardian angels.

It seemed like a possibility.

The fuss over me began as soon as Edward's Volvo had parked. It was ironic that I was getting all the attention when Edward had been in the accident as well. It seemed like the whole student body was afraid to approach the mysterious white students. They had the opposite effect on me obviously because I was drawn to them. Completely and utterly drawn to them, especially Edward.

I felt guilty that Angela had to be the one lying in a hospital bed right at this moment. I was already due to die, so why couldn't whoever pulled the strings up in the sky just end me earlier and safe Angela the stress of almost dying from a brain haemorrhage? It was not a pleasant way to die and my friend didn't deserve it.

"Bella?" Edward must have been speaking to me. As I looked to my left, he was standing outside my passenger door with it open in his hands. Bizarrely one of his hands was stretched out, offering to help me out of the vehicle. With the most sincere smile I could dredge up- this day hadn't exactly gone well- I took his offered assistance, picked up my school bag and got creakily out of the car. The bruise from my shower accident still throbbed painfully on my leg but I was determined not to show the pain on my expression. Along with that my empty stomach was growling, demanding sustenance mean as it was almost lunchtime.

It turned out that was why we had an entourage. It was lunch and students had come to demand an explanation to the accident this morning. The first person to reach me was Lauren; and her voice was virtually a growl.  
"Where's Tyler? Is he ok?" Sadly I knew nothing about Tyler's condition or Angela's. I'd been locked up in that observation room for the best part of four hours while the time passed by excruciatingly slowly. Thankfully, after closing the passenger's door gently Edward turned back to the crowds while his little sister took my hand and led me in through one of the side room doors; away from all the attention. It was safer for someone like Edward to answer the onslaught of questions. At least he knew the answers.  
"Do you want to go to the canteen?" Alice asked suddenly; her small hand still a little too tightly focused on my forearm. There would be bruises there later.

"I suppose so." I muttered into the floor, not looking up to meet Alice's eyes. somehow I knew she'd be staring at me in an unusual way because of my answer to the question and I figured I wouldn't have to answer her questions if I didn't look at her. Call me crazy but it seemed like a decent idea.

"Cool. Let's go." The pixie released my arm and started down the corridor, obviously expecting me to follow her wordlessly without complaint.

I did just that.

Without Angela there to speak to me at lunch I was pretty lonely on the lunch table. Throughout the first three minutes Mike jumped on me as soon as I'd sat down with my paid for lunch. He sounded exactly like a female when he damaged a full run-down on the ride back with the Cullens. Just for the record; I never had the chance to answer his question. A second before my lips opened to formulate a response Alice Cullen bounced over with a lunch tray beside me on the occupant seat to my left.

Mike-who was on my right-stared open-mouthed at the new addition and so did the others who were present. Lauren and Jessica were glaring while Ben smiled warmly at her. Eric shared Mike's response; to be completely honest I preferred them both when they weren't talking. Alice-not even bothering to start up a conversation with anyone but me forced her completely presence on me.

"Bella...I was wondering, do you want to go shopping in Seattle with me tonight? It's just...I need some new shoes for the junior prom and I want to get them early, before the rushes and stuff." I have to admit, for a second I considered her offer; and then I thought about how I'd be abandoning Charlie when I'd promised to spend my last couple of weeks with him. The selfish side of me reminded myself that he wouldn't be straight home, and we wouldn't be doing anything together anyway. Only watching television like last night.

What could one night hurt?

"I think I should be able to go Alice." I appealed to Jessica and-not wanting to be rude-Lauren, "Would you guys like to tag along?" Alice's nose wrinkled slightly at the mention of company but she didn't say anything against my invitation so I assumed she was ok with me handing it out. I wasn't sure why she wouldn't be though. What could Alice possibly have against Jessica and Lauren?

"I can tag along, yeah." Jessica nodded her agreement and continued to pick at the fruit salad she'd chosen from the counter today. For the second time in the week Jessica was playing with the label on her sandwiches; and I knew I wasn't imagining the wrinkle of disgust Alice shot her at that moment.

"I can't." Lauren said in a snippy voice, "I'm going to be out all night." With lustful eyes she copied Jess and started playing with her bottle cap while Mike, Eric and Ben were watching, confused as to why the girls weren't eating their food, only picking at it.

"You mind if I tag along?"

"Is your sister going to be there?" Mike and Eric spoke at the same time; both with sickly lustful eyes, kind of like Lauren's had been when she'd mentioned going out for the whole night. Maybe she was imagining herself with Tyler. He couldn't run away from her when he was unconscious in a hospital bed.

"No. Rose is going to be at Emmett's trail testifying." Alice's answer seemed slightly too...suspicious. Ben was the only other person who noticed and he chuckled slightly when Eric spat out the huge gulp of coke he'd sucked in from the can to his side.

"Trial?"  
"Yeah, for bodily harm. Someone hitting on 'my sister.'" Mike gave a nervous giggle and Eric was loosening the collar on his shirt, sweating crazily; like a pig.

"I'll come by and pick you up." Alice volunteered.

"We'll go to yours first if you want Jess and then we can wait at mine. You know where my dad lives right Alice?" Because it was highly likely that most of the teenagers in this school knew where the Chief of Police lived so they wouldn't get into any major trouble.

"Sure."

"Great."

"You never answered my question." Mike reminded Alice, who was standing up again with her tray. With a sharp-toothed smile I suddenly felt a wave of ice shoot down my spine.

"Sorry, no boys allowed." Her walk would have shamed the world's most graceful ballerina as she went to rejoin her family members at their usual table. Once she'd settled herself in the chair she spun round and waved happily at me, with a chirpy smile plastered on her lips. Maybe the sensation of having a cold bucket of water tipped over my head when she'd smiled before had been an illusion my mind had come up with.

She seemed fine now.  
"No offence, but the Cullens are complete freaks." Lauren started the conversation, and I had a feeling she meant offence when she spoke that statement.

"No. They're just different. Everyone's different." Ben told her; picking at the sandwich he'd picked up.

"Well, sometimes different isn't such a great thing." Mike muttered as he stared lustfully at me

"Do you think Alice would notice if we gate crashed the trip and showed you a real party?" Jessica was laughing at that statement and-because she was in the seat beside him-wrapped her arms round his waist and yanked his whole body into hers. His head was still bobbing up and down as she whispered something-probably sexual- in his ear.

Mike let out another nervous laugh.

"I don't know. Something tells me a shopping trip with Alice Cullen is going to be entertaining enough. Have any of you ever been shopping with her before?"

"You're kidding me right? They're outcasts, no one talks to them. They might be gorgeous but that won't buy them everything." Lauren smiled at that and so did Eric, Mike and Jessica. Ben shot me a funny look before he ate the final one of his two sandwiches.

"Well...maybe that needs to change." I mused; turning back to stare at the family one more time. Debating. What if they weren't as big and bad as they were made out to be? I'd spoken to Emmett yesterday and he'd been the kind of joking big brother I'd love to have. Alice and Edward were sweet; Alice was quite hyper ninety nine percent of the time. Carlisle Cullen was an angel in a human's body even though it had obviously been modified. His wife-Esme-I'd never bet but I could almost ensure she had a pure soul as well. Carlisle wouldn't be able to love her otherwise.

No, maybe the Cullens weren't that big and scary. Just misunderstood.

"What? You're going to approach them now and ask to be friends? They virtually send out a wave of "don't approach us because we're better than you" waves." I doubted that was the truth. Maybe the Cullens had something to hide from the students of Forks High School. Is that why they were so secretive?

"No. I'm not going to be that direct. I just...I don't think they're as bad as you think." Jessica laughed at my comment.

"Crushing on a certain someone are we?" There were two sounds. One was of someone exploding a fizzy can of pop while several people burst out into uncontrollable laughter. We all turned to stare at the guilty table...and surprisingly it was the Cullens one.

Edward had obviously shaken up the can or something because it had practically exploded over everyone on the table except Alice and Jasper. Rosalie was stroking her blonde hair while shooting dangerous daggers at Edward. Alice and Jasper were actually laughing at the situation and Emmett's laughter ran out the loudest, booming through the whole canteen. Edward had his back to me; and for some reason that bothered me, because I wanted to see the cute embarrassed expression on his face so bad.

Had I just called Edward cute?

No, I'd vowed to myself that I wasn't going to get attracted to a boy in this school, not when I'd have to leave him behind when I died. It wouldn't be fair, which is also the reason I was determined not to make any real friends in case my passing away hurt them too much. It seemed unfair to block Angela and Alice out of my life right now though mean as we'd only just become friends. If I could somehow keep distance between us maybe I could have friends and not make them suffer at the same time.

"Weird. It's like he read my thoughts." Jessica snorted, sending water up through her nose as she tried to stifle her bizarre laughter. Mike shot her a funny look and then returned his attention to me.

Was this lunchtime never going to end?

Finally, the hour for lunch was up and I was granted my leave. Jessica's question about my crush-even though it was non-existent-hadn't been asked again and for that I was glad. Edward hadn't exploded any more pressurised liquids and the furniture was still in one piece come the end of lunchtime. His accident with the can in the canteen had lit up everyone's day, excluding his.

As I arrived in the Biology room ready for the lesson Edward was sat perched in his seat, glaring at nothing in-particular on the wood while his finger traced endless swirls on a sheet of plain, lined paper which he'd placed on the table with a black biro. Why I was suddenly noticing every little thing I had no idea. It was the way Edward was holding himself, almost like he was restraining his body from doing something his brain didn't want to happen.

For the first thirty minutes of the lesson Edward went out of his way to avoid a conversation with me; and not once did he relax his pensive state in his stool. His body was rigid and it looked like he was about ready to murder a room of people like those suicide bombers at the underground in London. However the silence didn't last long mean as we both finished the assigned work in half the time and Mr Banner ordered us to learn more about each other mean as we were going to be lab partners for the rest of the year. Personally I think it was just because Mr Banner didn't know what to do with us. He obviously hadn't been expecting anyone to get through his assigned tasks so quickly.

Edward could only put off the conversation for so long. After three of the longest minutes of my life-he'd packed away his stuff and traced the graffiti on the table five times before he'd given up and turned to me-I finally had his attention and he had mine.

"Bella..." His question ended on his lips before it could reach my ears and I silently cursed whoever had it in for me up there in the sky. Somehow I thought maybe my grandmother or my grandfather were behind this, they'd done this sort of thing to tease me when they were alive as well. I'd liked this boy living down their road when I was seven and when he'd come over to talk to me my grandfather had come outside and stopped the conversation on the child's lips. The poor child never talked to me again, nor did he approach my grandparent's house.

"Yes?" The story running through my mind almost took away my attention but I just managed to hang onto a string of sanity to encourage a conversation between us. Edward once again hesitated for a moment, and then he sucked in his breath and came straight out with what was bothering him.

"You never answered Jessica's question."

A/N: One thing. The part where Bella's in hospital I had to change because Carlisle will tell Edward through his thoughts that Bella has leukaemia and it's too early in the story for that. Also, the part about Seattle, as I said before, I have to make changes to sort the story. Thanks, and just for anyone over eager...Edward is in the Seattle scene just not in the expected part, so Bella and he still have their dinner date and everything. Plus, Alice is going to replace Angela in that scene because poor Angela is in hospital. In the lunch scene I had to write Edward's "accident" in. He lost his cool and gripped a can a little too tight because he thought Bella might fancy him. Hehe. Cute.

Review! (Please? Pretty, pretty please with a cherry on top?)


	4. Chapter 4

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Four _

Impossible Circumstances

For a whole minute I simply sat in my biology seat staring blankly at him while his words cut through the cold exterior surrounding my brain. It was impossible for Edward to have heard our conversation, at the time he'd been on the other side of the canteen; and the can had exploded when Jess was talking so surely he wouldn't have been able to make out the words even then.

"Bella?" Edward sounded unsure, like he'd somehow sent me reeling into a coma with his questions. The bored class droned on with Mr Banner's activities and just when I'd welcome a distraction-even an exploding tap or something-everything was just perfect, which is, let's face it, my luck.  
"How did you hear Jessica's question Edward? Weren't you on the other side of the canteen?" Edward contemplated his answer for a couple of minutes before he let out a gust of cool air which sent all sorts of sensations down the back of my neck. There was no question as to if I was crushing on Edward Cullen.

Who could honestly refuse him?  
"The acoustics in the hall are top of the range. It's amazing how much easier conversation is to overhear." Somehow his lie sounded authentic; as I glanced in his eyes-hoping maybe they'd enlighten me with the proper truth-I felt myself falling into golden orbs of fiery sunlight.

What was my question again?

Why was Edward staring at me so intently? All I could think about were his breath-taking, vivid, dazzling eyes. Had they always been that absorbing? I'd only known him for two days and he already had me wrapped around his little finger.

"What are you thinking?" His voice was like lingering fingers of warmth and comfort. Somehow those feelings lulled me into a false sense of security and the words escaped my lips before I'd consciously given them permission.

"About your question." With one, checking glance in his direction I continued, knowing he was as eager as anyone to hear my reply; "I do like you Edward. Very much. It's unusual though because...well...I've never known a guy I liked enough to..." It was a well known fact-to myself, no one here actually knew that well because I'd never met anyone of them-that explaining my feelings didn't come easily, so I was struggling enormously at this point. How did I explain to Edward that I was imagining him naked already? I didn't know an awful lot about dating but imagining the male naked on first sight couldn't be a good sign right?

Or could it?

It depended on how you looked at the situation.

"What about you Edward?" Almost immediately a vibrant blush flooded into my cheeks, marking them a rosy pink. Somehow that question had also slipped my lips before I'd given it permission, I might need some sort of cure for this; I couldn't have words escaping from my lips left, right and centre when they were best locked away could I?

"You don't have to answer that if you don't want to Edward. It was extremely direct of me." I'd forgotten at this point however that he'd started this; that he'd asked me the question first. He hadn't forgotten.

"No, I believe I owe you an answer. It's only fair."

"Yes, I'm attracted to you Bella. I find it only fair to be truthful, but...I don't think it would be the brightest of ideas for us to be _friends_. There are...complications." Did Edward know about my leukaemia? Was that what he saw as a complication? It was right for him to gain that opinion. Why would he want to date me when-if-he knew I was going to die soon?

Surely then, if the relationship did actually turn out ok he'd be crushed when I passed away, leaving him on his own.

"Yes," I said mournfully, regrettably. "You're probably right. It wouldn't be fair."

The rest of the lesson passed in silence. Edward sat rigidly in his seat, his eyes wide with-what I hoped-was sadness and confusion. I obviously wasn't hoping he was miserable, that would be mean. I was however hoping Edward _did _like me, that he did want to _date _me because truthfully? He was perfect in every way, and to gain someone like that? A Greek God?

It would be the final departing gift from heaven before I was taken under.

The bell rang, dismissing us from our fifth lesson; and relieved beyond compare, I packed away my science textbook and writing equipment, dragging out the time. To my intense shock-once I'd wasted a couple of minutes, trying to block the gripping pain-I turned round to come face to face with Edward, who'd waited for me.

My eyes must have narrowed in confusion because he let out a light chuckle.

"I thought it would be polite to walk with you to your next class." What an unusual gesture. Edward really was a gentleman, not only did he walk women to lessons; he didn't examine them like pieces of meat either. Two points on his scorecard.

"I'd appreciate that." My voice was barely above a whisper but through some miracle Edward managed to make out the words clearly enough.

The walk to Gym was interesting to say the least. Edward stood stiffly at my side, glaring at every student we passed with obvious distaste. Why was he doing that? I was contemplating scolding him for his mean behaviour. No wonder his family were outcasts if they glared at people like that, it was unnerving to me and I wasn't even the subject to his glares.

"So...you're going shopping with my sister tonight?"

"I guess so." The hesitation in my voice was obviously plain because Edward turned round with questions in his eyes.

""Does shopping not appeal to you?" I was thinking more along the lines of my lack of energy, it would no doubt slow Jess and Alice down, plus I wasn't such a great fan of shopping. The activity never appealed to me. so I could easily answer Edward's question just as my lips were aching to.

"No. Shopping isn't one of my favourite pastimes." I told him in confirmation. Edward pondered what to say for a moment-it was obvious when you saw the spark flash in his eyes-now that the 'chat' had taken a turn in another direction.

"SO what do you like because I don't think Alice is going to give you a choice with shopping." That was the worst news I'd heard all week, the idea of being forced into clothes stores over and over again was my equivalent to hell.

"I like bookshops, music stores. Anything but clothes." I have to admit, my face paled when I caught the look on Edward's face. It was almost like he was scared for me. Alice-this is only my predication-was probably an avid shopper.

"That might be a problem involving Alice then. You can still cancel."

"That would be rude." Okay, maybe shopping with Alice wasn't such a great idea but what else could I do? If I cancelled I'd hurt her feelings. I wasn't that kind of person. Suffering through a shopping trip with Alice Cullen was a necessity.

"You're an unusual human Bella. A normal human would search frantically to get out of an activity they don't like but you...walk head first into it with no complaints." Just as Edward finished his short speech I noticed we'd arrived at the gym about five minutes ago. Even though by all rights of the world I should have thanked him for his company and dismissed myself, I didn't want t. I really didn't want to.

All good things have to come to an end as I already know because of my leukaemia and such so I let out a low sigh.

"Thanks for waking with me Edward. It was nice of you to offer." Edward shot me a heart-breaking smile.

"It was my pleasure Bella." Then he retreated to his next lesson, leaving me on my own outside the changing room.

Coach Clapp came and found me while I was in the process of removing my shirt. With a blush and a muttered apology he stood in the entrance of the changing room while he relayed his message.

"Because of the incident this morning you've been excused from gym. We need a rule keeper though so you can watch on the bleachers." Then he departed without another word and I stared stupidly at the entrance to the changing room. Edward must have had gym earlier, or had he missed it when he was at the hospital? Why was I suddenly so obsessed with Edward? I had a small crush on the guy, if I wasn't careful I'd end up stalking his every movement like an ophealic. After several minutes of pointed, wasted thinking I realised I was standing blankly in the middle of the changing room in nothing but a bra and jeans on. With a sinned blush I Quickly found my way into my long sleeved t-shirt, accidently knocking my elbow on the big, metal lockers where most of the students stored their clothing while they participated in gym.

Waves of intense pain rolled through my system and as a consequence of that I let out a mild wail of unrestrained pain. It was times like these when I wished my leukaemia would just take my life now and end the suffering permanently. Things would most certainly be easier. Sadly my cry of pain affected the noise level outside, it had been roar-like and excited before, like the atmosphere before and during a fight, now it was eerily silent, like the way an audience goes when a girl in a horror movie walks towards the scary noise instead of away from it.

The breath caught in my battered lungs as whispers began to richoete towards me, traces of their secrets reaching my ears. No matter how much I strained I couldn't make out a single word of anyone's comments. Why did students insist of making sarcastic comments behind my back? My time for pondering was cut short however when Jessica was sent into the changing rooms to check if I was ok.

"Are you okay Bella? We heard someone crying." The way she said "crying" obviously suggested she was trying to embarrass me by exploiting my weakness. That idea was going to back fire on her if I had a say in it. _If _being the operative term.  
"I'm ok thank you Jess. I just hit my arm, elbow to be exact."

"You want to go to the nurse's office or something?" Her tone was flippant, like she was talking to a housemaid instead of a fellow, equal student.

"No, I'm fine thank you Jess. Let's go and join in with Gym." Was it my imagination of did that idea force her bottom lip down? And was that queasiness I saw embedded in her eyes. Had I found Jessica's weak spot? One that wasn't Mike Newton of course.

There wasn't anything I could accomplish with the new information however; and that one fact drove me into anger. I could have had an advantage over her, even though I'd probably be too nice to use it. I was like that in my guilty conscience and such.

Once Jessica and I had arrived; joining the hustle and bustle of the crowds of students, Coach Clapp had allowed me to retreat to the bleachers as my class mates started throwing balls left, right and centre in a game I didn't know the rules of or see a point in. After ten minutes of me missing the most important calls when a player on the other team messed up a shot, Mike took over the referring and I was thankful. The less time spent concentrating the better for me.

Twenty agonisingly long minutes stretched past unbearably slow, and when the final bell eventually droned out its call; huge and hard crowds of students pushed and violently jerked me through their ranks as they all rushed to try and get changed the fastest. Jessica and Lauren were the first two females to finish dressing but they spent a good ten minutes primping themselves in the steamed up windows the furthest away from me and my belongings.

Why was I hanging around? What was I waiting for?

It struck me after a couple of moments of thinking. I was waiting for Angela, who wasn't here. She was basically the only real friend-discrediting Alice-I'd made here, which explained why it had felt weird a few moments ago. It was unpleasant to be in a room with people you didn't class as your friends.

Glad to have that dilemma under control, I threw my jacket onto my shoulders and exited with my school bag balancing in my hand as I tried to zip up my dodgy zipper. The overcast clouds weren't a surprise once I'd broken through the gym doors; nor were the damp droplets that splattered onto my coat and the lush grass around me. Collections of water had already gathered on the lumpy concrete in the parking lot. Still wrestling with the reluctant zipper on my jacket; I was shocked when a pair of ice-cold hands shot out from in front of me and cracked the ignorant zipper up in one attempt.

The shock set me a foot backwards and I tripped over my own feet...only to be rescued once again by those positively beautiful pale arms that belonged to Edward.

"Careful Bella. I've known never a..." His sentence cut off abruptly, and in an attempt to change the subject he released me from his vice-like grip and straightened the bag out on my left shoulder mean as the strap had gone crooked when I'd been knocked off balance.

"I was just...umm...wondering if you'd thought any more on what I said. About Alice's shopping trip." What had Edward said about Alice's shopping trip? I knew for a fact that the likes of Alice Cullen wouldn't be satisfied with going in one shop and then spending the rest of the time in bookshops. She made her preferred shopping boutiques obvious by the way she dressed. I bet she helped the males pick out their clothes in the morning as well.  
"What did you say?" My eyes narrowed and my eyebrows shot up as I squinted, attempting to remember where I'd parked my truck this morning before the whole van incident. With a heavy conscience I realised that the back of my truck would probably be toast by now mean as the blue van had hit it on the rebound away from us. Somehow Edward's combined will and strength had protected us. There were questions that I needed to ask him really.

Neither Angela nor I had stopped that van from hitting us, and it was definitely going to hit us, so what had Edward done to stop it? Surely it was impossible for someone his size to stop a van that size changing direction? I doubted Emmett, Edward's older brother would even manage that kind of thing.

The weight would just be too much.

Completely overwhelming for humans to deter from its original course.

And the Cullens were only human.

"The shopping trip, to Seattle? With my sister? You can still back out now, maybe me and you could...go and...Visit a bookstore or music shop somewhere in Port Angeles?" He shrugged his perfectly sculpted shoulders in a gesture that basically said "it doesn't matter if you refuse" but I knew from the glowing affection in his eyes that he'd very much like me to accompany him.

Yet in Biology and on the walk to Gym he'd made it pretty clear that he didn't even want to be friends with me. Did Edward have multiple personalities? Did he suffer from being bi-polar? It was the only explanation I could contemplate.

Seconds before agreement was ready to shoot from my lips-how could I turn down an invitation from Edward Cullen, the guy I was crushing on madly?-Alice appeared out of nowhere; and the guilt started to circulate in my defenceless body. I _had_ promised her a shopping trip, and I wasn't one to break my promises. Was there a way I could fix this without hurting either of their feelings?

"Now, now, Edward. I will get my shopping trip." Alice glared at Edward in an aggravated fashion and he glared stonily right back at her. It was like I'd suddenly dissolved into the pavement. They'd completely forgotten my presence.

"Bella has the right to choose who she spends her time with."  
"She also has a right to come on one of _my _shopping trips. I mean, come on, look at those shoes!" The smallest Cullen pointed my shoes out to her un-impressed brother.

"She needs some retail education." Okay, the sound of _that _wasn't very appealing. Plus, there was absolutely nothing wrong with my wardrobe, and especially not with my shoes! They were the flattest ones I had, which made them handy for most activities and they blended with any outfit. _Someone _obviously didn't like my fashion sense.

Someone giggled behind us; a cheeky, stuck-up edge to the tone as Jessica approached us with an "I have bad news" pout on her round features. For a second I thought maybe she was coming over purely to ogle Edward, honestly, she stood staring blankly at him for five minutes before Alice cleared her throat to remind Jessica that there were indeed other people watching the current events, and we both felt slightly queasy obviously from the matching expressions on our similar faces.

Alice shot me a wide-toothed smile.

I didn't think it'd be a problem befriending certain Cullens, especially if they seemed that eager to be friends. Was Alice constantly on energy drinks or something related? Because she seemed to have countless stores of energy. Maybe she was an athlete. That would mean she'd do a lot of physical activity. Maybe or maybe not. Somehow I couldn't imagine Alice Cullen participating in physical exercise unless shopping counted.

"Yeah..." I didn't miss the way Jessica spoke directly to me, almost like she thought if she didn't address Alice then she wouldn't be there hearing our conversation. The smallest Cullen rolled her eyes but kept quiet.

"Bella, I can't make it tonight. I have...other commitments." To emphasise her point she pointed grandly with her eyes in the direction of Mike Newton, who was currently flexing his biceps-non-existent ones I might add-to some of the new freshman girls, who were giggling manically as they tried to make a quick escape from the deranged man. I didn't blame them.

Jessica eyes flared as she watched the show unfold before her, but as far as I could tell she let it flow beneath her because she turned back to me with the same, false smile, continuing with her excuse.

"Yeah, as I was saying. Mike asked me out! For tonight, and I just couldn't pass up the opportunity. We can go shopping any time; this thing with Mike is once in a lifetime! He's like, the hunkiest guy in the universe..." Once again, I was sure I didn't miss the occasionally flutter of her eyes in Edward's direction, nor did I miss the cocky smile stretch onto his features as he replaced the mask on his facade. Edward knew he was attractive, he'd used it to his advantage often enough. Even though he knew that, he didn't use it to gain himself popularity or the cutest girl in the school. He seemed more likely to use his influence on other students in a classroom so they'd quiet down so he was able to learn.

Yes, that sounded like something Edward would do.

"So...I just came over to tell you not to wait up for me." When I merely nodded; her jaw tensed and her bottom lip bulged.  
"And I'll see you tomorrow." Another meek nod. Still my reaction didn't satisfy her.

"Don't worry; I'll give you a full low down on the date in English." Slowly; not wanting to continue this awkward conversation I nodded enthusiastically and she pouted strongly as she retreated across the parking lot to her own vehicle. I swear I heard her mutter "not normal," under her breath as retreated with her tail between her legs.

Kind of like a kicked dog.

Or a wounded animal.

What had she been expecting? How else was I meant to react when she told me she was cancelling our shopping trip so she could go on a trip with Mike Newton? The way she'd boasted, you'd almost get the impression she thought I'd be, well, it was almost like she thought I'd be _jealous_. Why on Earth, however, would I be jealous of Mike Newton?  
Edward for that matter. I'd be very jealous if someone else got to date him. Somehow I'd grown this possessive streak, and it centred mainly on Edward. While I was around I didn't want any other girl eyeing him up. In my head he was already my boyfriend and we were happily running away somewhere so we could be together forever.

Okay, I knew it wasn't a reality because I was due to die in a couple of weeks but any girl could dream. On que; the aching, itchy feeling in my bones and every other part of my body started up again, and tentatively, I scratched my arm through the long-sleeves of my coat.

"Well, it looks like it's just me and you Bella." Alice seemed a little _too _happy. The way she was bouncing up and down, and her behaviour from before Jessica came over, it was almost like Alice knew we were about to lose one participant in the shopping trip.

Another question was added onto my long list.

How would Alice know that Jessica was going to cancel?  
It almost matched up with;

How had Edward heard me across a canteen full of noisy students?

"I guess that's ok." My voice sounded terrified. Who wouldn't be when someone as small as Alice seemed to be completely crazy with hyperness? How could a shopping trip make her so _happy_? I only shopped when it was necessary, and not normally for clothes or accessories.

Clothes shopping definitely wasn't a type of shopping I particularly favoured.

"Do you mind if I ride with you? That way we don't have to go to two places at once."

"No, I don't mind in the slightest."

"Great." Alice's smile got even wider and potentially scarier as she hopped over to my Chevy. The smirk immediately died on her lips; replaced with a new type of frown I hadn't seen on her features before. Edward chuckled behind her.

"See you later Alice."  
"Edward." She whined loosely; making puppy dog eyes at his retreating figure.

"I know what you're doing Alice." What were they talking about?

"What are you talking about?" I asked politely. I'd had enough of being left out of the conversation.

"Nothing Bella, Alice is just...a speed fanatic." Oh, that explained it. She didn't like my Chevy because it barely reached fifty five. Well, she'd have to survive.

"I think we'll have to go to Port Angeles instead." Alice mused as she scrambled into the passenger side of the car and locked her seatbelt in place in the three seconds. Surely that was a little faster than humans were capable off? Maybe my idea of Alice being an athlete wasn't half that crazy.

With one last backwards glance at Edward-who'd reached his Volvo and was climbing into the driver's side- I retreated into the driver's cab of my truck and kicked-started the growling engine into gear. Alice winced at the whine my truck let out but she didn't utter a word. That was a good choice; I was feeling very sensitive about my truck at the moment.

My white house loomed above me like a bully on a playground as my truck managed to drag itself the last few metres onto the drive. Alice was taking in every detail of my home with interest blooming in her eyes.

"You can come inside if you want." I offered loosely; taking the key from the ignition at the same time as I exited the cab, taking my school bag with me. Her face was shocked for a moment, then she broke into a wide grin again as she loped out and joined me in five more seconds. I swear, she was making me feel like an old age pensioner with the speed at which she moved.

"You looked surprised for a minute there Alice." As she hovered by my side, I finished locking up the truck and headed towards the locked front door which was barring my way inside. No answer met mine for a couple of seconds, and then Alice seemed to have pieced together the words she was looking for in order to answer my query because she smiled, leaning forward as she picked the house key out straight away from the busy bundle in my hands.

"Thanks." That saved me the stress of hunting down my house key.

"Well...I guess it's because I don't get invited anywhere with people normally. The only people I intermingle with are my siblings, and sometimes...it gets a little...predictable." Somehow the word "predictable" didn't make me think that Alice found her home boring. The way the sentence was phrased, you'd think that Alice was telling me she knew things that were going to happen at her home.

Being observant has never been my thing, which means I can't piece together any of the peculiar things Alice has done or said in the past day. Alice continued with her speech as we entered the house and ascended the stairs. Once in my bedroom her fingers seemed to rise automatically; her eyes seemed locked and drawn to my closet.

"Would you mind terribly if I..." Her question was left out there in the open for me to expand on or accept.

"I guess." The idea of Alice Cullen wanting to look inside my closet was a foreign concept in my head, but that didn't mean I was about to say no to her questions.

Somehow, even from inside the confides of my closet, her voice carried.

"Like I was saying, most of the people from school think we're freaks, so they don't speak to us or anything. It's a shame really because I'd love to give some of them makeovers, show them how to use their fashion properly instead of in the "cheap" looks they keep now." She sighed once as she finished her raiding of my closet. Just in case you didn't understand, my closet isn't an actual closet, it's my dresser which only has a couple of drawers filled. I don't need that many clothes when I've only got two to three weeks left to survive. Not that I could explain that to her.

She looked far from satisfied as she emerged from my equivalent to my whole collection of clothes. Her next question had me laughing.

"Okay, where are the rest of your clothes?"

"That's it." Her lips popped a good couple of times before she recovered her posture. Her lips moved under her breath but I didn't catch the sway her mental conversation went in. She obviously meant for it to be a private comment mean as I couldn't hear it so I didn't demand to know what she'd muttered.  
"Okay, let's go."  
"What you said before Alice, about you being a freak? It's not true. Just because you're different from the other students at school doesn't mean you're a freak. Honestly, you're the kind of person I'd choose as a best friend. You're lively, yet sweet, and at the same time you manage to be responsible yet fun-loving. I don't know how you do it, I've known you one day." To show emphasis on my point, I held up a single finger and shook it around slightly.

Alice giggled and tugged on my arm; bringing us both out of my bedroom. Halfway down the stairs I unloosed myself from her grip and quickly shot upstairs like a bullet to switch my school bag to a small handbag which Renee had bought me on one of her long trips to God knows where. It was brown leather with gold buckles. Once I'd switched my money and my copy of Wuthering Heights into the handbag, my bruised and battered legs tugged me back downstairs again.

Alice was sitting cross-legged on the couch examining something on the coffee table. As I got closer recognition and horror shot through me. Charlie had left one of the letters open on the side, readable to any passing eyes, including Alice's. True enough, she was scanning the words on the paper, trying, but not succeeding to hide her interest as I quickly covered the distance between me and the incriminating letter. Once I reached it, it was crumpled in my hand and thrown head first into the open, woven trashcan.

"Are you ready to go Alice?" My new friend seemed frozen in her position on the couch for a second, before she blinked and the illusion was broken. For a moment I thought she'd read about my leukaemia.

Surely if she knew about my condition she'd question me on it?

Or would she keep it a secret? Would Alice ask Carlisle?

No, she wouldn't know the connection between me and him. How would she know he'd been the doctor asked to keep an eye on me during the flight from Phoenix to Forks? Simple answer, she wouldn't know. That letter was going to become ashes soon enough. As soon as I got home to be exact. It had already caused enough trouble. Was that why my father had been so reluctant to let me go with Edward and Alice this morning?

Damn it, I didn't even know what the thing said yet.

"Sure, sorry. I was away somewhere for a moment."  
"Don't stay there too long. You might miss our shopping trip otherwise." She was suddenly deadly serious.  
"Don't joke about stuff like that. You desperately need my help on clothing. You've hardly got any." Once again, if she knew about my leukaemia questions would be shooting my way right at this moment, unless she was fishing, hoping I'd tell her the truth. Well, she was going to be disappointed. It wasn't that I didn't want to tell her the truth, I did, but the truth always carried complications, and I couldn't handle them. Not now, not in condition. Someone else would be left with the clean up once I'd died, and for once that was fine with me. I was letting myself fall deeper and deeper, yet at the same time I had to start drawing away; otherwise they'd all be devastated when I died so suddenly.

"Whoa, calm down Alice. I really was only kidding, and I thought this trip was because _you_ wanted to go shopping for clothes for yourself?"

"Originally." She agreed, "But after seeing your closet I see you need more retail help than me."

"Alice..." I whined, sounding like Alice had with Edward back at the parking lot. Why did she want to torture me? It would just be bearable to watch _Alice _try on all sorts of clothes, now she wanted me to try the stuff on? I could see myself being drained of energy before we'd even finished at the first store.

Why on Earth had I agreed to a shopping trip with Alice Cullen?

My new "best friend" had a sudden attitude change, and she was bouncing up and down again in joy.

"Come on." She uttered impatiently, dragging me outside.

"Hang on a second. I need to leave a note for Charlie." Still more impatient than a bull being taunted by a red flag she got both for me in less than three seconds and the pen was ready in my hand the next time I blinked. Okay, this was just downright creepy. How had she moved so fast? We were outside, and she'd gone inside and got back out again in less than three seconds.

It was impossible.

I must have imagined it; somehow the reality I'd just seen couldn't be real.

"Alice, how did you move so fast?"  
"I didn't." That denial came a little too quickly.

"You did. You moved in like three seconds."

"It's impossible for someone to move that fast Bella." She told me sternly, with confidence I could never have in my lifetime. Maybe I had been imagining it.

"Now hurry up! This is taking time out of my shopping trip! And I'm not going to be happy if I lose another unnecessary second!" Obediently I sketched a quick note for Charlie;

_Gone shopping with Alice Cullen. Hope you don't mind. We can spend some time together when we get back. Love Bells. _

Alice snatched the note away and disappeared back inside the house, slower this time. While she was gone I unlocked the truck and slid into the driver's side. One light tap on the driver's door had me looking at Alice in surprise, while she looked confused.

Once I'd opened the door to listen to her question she narrowed her eyes in confusion even further.

"Don't you normally lock the door of your home in case of robberies or something?" Oh damn! There went my memory. The doctor had warned me that I might start forgetting to do things because my body would be stretched to its limits as the cancer ran its course.

As I finished locking the door I suddenly felt uneasy, like someone was watching me from the tress. Feeling stupid and paranoid but sure that I'd seen something at the same time; I crept out of easy sight and retreated down the steps. Alice was busy looking at something inside my truck; her head was turned down as her eyes scanned something I couldn't see. Maybe she was reading a statement for her bank balance or something, checking how much she could spend on her next shopping trip. Sounds like Alice.

The person in the woods, watching, still kept their eyes on me even when it was obvious I was onto their spying. I wondered, momentarily if I should just walk right up to them and ask why they were watching my movements, but I've never been good at starting conversations with strangers, especially ones staking out my house when it was obvious no one was home.

Feeling stupid and humiliated I locked the front door, checking it twice before I was satisfied. How had I forgotten such a simple thing? It was obviously the idea of someone watching my movements. It had me freaked out. Who would want to do that though? That was the main question.

I'm just going crazy, I admitted to myself. No one's watching, I just think they are. It's kind of like thinking Alice ran that fast. It's impossible. My death symptoms are obviously catching up to me. Are there such things as death symptoms? Warning of when you're going to die? And if so, why haven't I had them?

Still angry and confused at myself, I slid into my truck and began my drive to Port Angeles hoping for no ounce of conversation the whole way. I was sitting in a vehicle with Alice, who had finished reading whatever had been in her hands which made my hope feeble and-let's face it-impossible. I'd known Alice a day, yet I felt like she'd been my best friend for years.

It made me feel slightly bad, considering Angela had been a good friend when I'd first arrived as well. I'd have to take some flowers to her in hospital. I knew from experience that it wasn't pleasant staying in a hospital where the only entertainment was the nurse's ideas of "fun." Most of the time I'd skipped out of them, using my cancer as an excuse.

"Are you okay Bella? You seem really...scatter brained." That was a good description of how I was feeling right at this current moment. Somehow my brain had become 100% scattered, which meant everything I understood and lived by in the world had been turned around. I'd be seeing vampires and werewolves next. I already believed in angels.

One was apparently sitting in my car if my brain was working correctly. More were at school and the local hospital. Another reason to visit.

"I'm okay thanks Alice, I was just wondering how I could forget something so..."  
"Simple? Don't worry; I forget stuff all the time." She tried to comfort me, but the net of worry in my stomach had caught my nerves and it wasn't letting them go. Sure, most people forget things now and then, but what was the chance someone with leukaemia would forget simple things like that? Actually, ignore that question. It doesn't make any sense.

"Now, stop wasting time. We have shopping to do."  
"Alice, do we have to go shopping? Can't we just hang out in a café or a bookshop or something?" She contemplated my question for a second. One single, second before coughing slightly.

"I'll make you a deal. If we have any time left over, we can go into a bookshop. This is a shopping trip, which means buying _clothes and shoes and accessories_, there's no way I'm going to go on a shopping expedition and not bring anything back. I'll never live it down with my family."

"How long are you planning on taking Alice?" Once again, she played with me. For five minutes of the ride she pretended to think of her answer. Finally, I couldn't take it any more.

"Is it bad news Alice?" She stared at me, ashamed of my attitude to shopping.  
"Bad news? How can anything shopping related be bad Bella?" It was hard concentrating on the road and Alice at the same time but I managed. Just.

"Well, my idea of bad news when it's shopping related is that we're going to be shopping for a long time, or if someone else is planning on spending money on me. I hate having money spent on me." Okay, Alice did look slightly sick at that idea but she didn't comment. I wonder why she looked shocked.

Was it such a surprise that I didn't want people buying things for me?

Things that I should buy if I really wanted them?

"So you don't like people buying things for you?"  
"No, Alice, I don't." Panic flashed in her eyes and my full attention swerved to her reaction. Why was she acting like I'd just admitted I was about to blow this car up with her inside? Shopping wasn't the axis the world spun on; we'd all survive without it.

"That might be a problem."  
"Why?" Once again, she refused to answer my question. How come whenever I asked her a decent question she refused to answer?

"Alice, come on. I need answers. Two to be exact. How long are we planning on being and why is my tendency to not let people buy me things a problem?" The little pixie smirked as she considered her reply. Black, shadow trees shot past us as my truck drove past at fifty miles per hour. For a second, I could swear I caught a flash of golden eyes reflected in the greenery up in front but I put that suspicion aside. My eyes were just playing tricks on me. No one was out there watching me. No one had been watching me when I'd been at my house either. It was all my imagination.

Now, back to Alice's reply.  
"Come on Alice." I whined again, trying to do a perfect copy of her puppy dog pout. It was obviously decent because she caved completely.

"Ok, to question one. I don't know, about five, six hours maybe. It's only fiveish so we have until nine, ten before the shops close." There really wasn't an excuse for me to fight with her on that point, even though my leukaemia would make sure I wouldn't be doing anything until the weekend, when I went down to La Push to see Jake and Billy. I had two, maybe three weekends if I was lucky. Then in-between I had Wednesday, Thursday and Friday left of this week. Then I had a potential extra ten days not including weekends. That meant I had a maximum of nineteen days left to be alive.

Nineteen days left to live.

Nice.

"What about question two Alice?" I already had a bad feeling. I honestly didn't have all that much money with me, and from the look on Alice's set face she was planning on doing serious shopping if she got the chance, which I was hoping I wouldn't give her. There was no hesitation from her this time. The confidence was back.

"And I was hoping you wouldn't mind people spending money on you because I plan on buying you a whole new wardrobe."

The car veered right off the road.

A/N: Is Bella going crazy? I don't think so. Alice is playing with her, sort of. What it is is that Alice doesn't realise to begin with that she's using her powers in front of Bella because they're already close and stuff. Okay, and for anyone who wants to know, the part where Alice is whining at Edward in the car park? She saw a vision of Bella's small closet and wanted to buy her a whole new one but Edward forbid it. Thanks for reading, and remember to review.


	5. Chapter 5

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Five _

Pleasant Dreams

It took a couple of seconds for me to realise I'd swerved. Somehow, the action was just so unlike me; and it hadn't been provoked. Alice didn't scream or bury her face in her hands as we spun crazily round and round, my control over my vehicle slipping through my fingers like grains of sand. It was my fault. I'd let myself get distracted easily. Just because Alice had claimed she was planning on buying another wardrobe for me didn't warrant a reason for crashing and no doubt killing me early and her way early.

I didn't want to be responsible for her death. I always knew I'd hurt my friends when I was gone but this was going slightly too far. Spinning manically in one direction; my vision seemed to be blurring already, even before the impact. Why was everything so different now? Alice didn't even have her eyes open; she was squinting as she concentrated on some inner part of herself I couldn't see.

Was she religious? Was she praying for help right now? I hoped God looked down on her and helped her out of this situation unharmed. She didn't deserve to be harmed because of me and an overreaction.

The impact-which I was waiting for-never, happened. Alice was positioned outside; having slashed the seatbelt round her and somehow; with her miniature form she'd stopped my truck from coursing into a collision. The framework was dented; moulded to her form.

Edward stopping a van I could just about accept, but his tiny sister who couldn't even weigh a tenth of my truck's overall weight? No way. Something fishy was obviously going on here.

Plumes of smoke screeched as they blew from my complaining exhaust as the truck was forced to an abrupt halt. As soon as we'd stopped my feet instinctively crushed the brake pedal.

From both the force of the brakes and Alice's suspicious super strength I was thrown forward in my seat. Squealing reached my ears and my vision continued to blur until suddenly my eyes focused and I was forced into cold, harsh reality.

The truck had been stopped from coasting into some sort of deadly danger. By Alice Cullen. The youngest adopted sibling about the size of a pixie.

The shock and suspicion must have been obvious on my features because Alice released herself from my now immobile truck and sighed.

"Bella, are you okay?"  
"Oh, I'm fine. How did you do that?"

"Do what?" Her eyes widened innocently as she examined the damage her dainty body had done. I checked the scene with my own eyes. Now that she was away from there and standing next to the driver's compartment, it was harder to accept that she had really stopped my truck from crashing. Had I been imagining things? Was that even possible?

The very concept of Alice stopping my truck was ridiculous. I had to be have been hallucinating.

"Bella? Are you okay? You've gone all pale and you look like you're about to…" She didn't finish her sentence. The stress of the situation was overwhelming; intoxicating.

Before I knew what I was doing, my body was going into shut down; my vision sliced off immediately; my hearing suddenly faded away into blankness. My sense of touch and taste disappeared completely.

It was like someone had cut me off from humanity.

It felt like I'd already died and I was waiting in limbo for "the final judgement."

I wasn't sure how long I'd been out this time, but when I came around to consciousness again; I was lying in a hospital bed with no one else present in the room.

No one I noticed at first.

Shadows danced across the pane of sheer white glass which was positioned in the wall of my private room. Somehow I expected Charlie to be sunk out in the nearest plastic chair, as uncomfortable as my mother had been when I'd been admitted into the Phoenix hospital. Part of me was glad Charlie wasn't repeating history. If something bad happened at least Charlie wouldn't be here to see my end.

It seemed fairer to him that way. It was unfair that I wouldn't get to lay out the rest of his mementoes but I could deal with that. He'd find them in my suitcase eventually. I knew he'd know they were last, parting gift from me.

"Isabella?" The voice was vaguely familiar; its tone like that of an angel. The angel from the plane. Carlisle Cullen.

"Yes?" My attention came back to the kind individual who'd agreed to be an on-hand doctor in case I needed his assistance. My sincerest thanks still needed to be expressed to him. My mother would never have allowed me to come and say goodbye to my father here in Forks if there hadn't been an assurance of my safety.

"How are you feeling?" While he was talking Carlisle checked something in the red folder at the tip of my bed, mounted onto some brown wood which was scratched badly. The metal railings bordering my bed were smudged with forgotten fingerprints while the crisp white sheets on the hospital bed were wrinkled under my weight. I was thankful however that I was still in the clothes I'd carefully selected this morning.  
"I'm…I don't know. What happened?" Carlisle glanced once more at my folder and nodded for a second before replacing it in its holder.

"You were in a car accident. You and my daughter, Alice. Thankfully neither of you were hurt. I'm afraid your truck wasn't so lucky. The bumper was dented beyond repair." His eyes were wide and apologetic.

I was concentrating more on the words he'd said rather than how he looked after he'd fed me the lie. I remembered clearly what had happened. Alice had stopped the truck; she'd stepped in front of it and the metal body had moulded itself into her yet it had stopped from the force.

That couldn't have really happened. It was impossible, poor Alice would have been crushed to death and the truck would have continued. On top of that Alice would never have been able to exit the truck that fast. If she managed to fall out the door I'd have been halfway down the road by the time she managed to catch up.

Too late to help.

Maybe Carlisle was telling the truth and I'd hallucinated the eventuality where Alice stopped the truck. It made more sense. Yet why would I daydream about Alice stopping a truck? Was I suffering from some sort of mental lapse? Was I relating her rescuing me to when Edward had stopped Tyler's van from crushing me and Angela?

I just didn't know any more. I was so confused. What had happened and what hadn't? I just wanted some simple answers.

"The truck…crashed?" Carlisle's eyes measured up to mine confidently.

"You may not remember it. Alice said you passed out before the contact." I knew for a fact that I'd passed out. Fainted. Whatever you wanted to call it, the stress had made me do it.

"I don't know...I could swear...Alice...stopped the truck." Carlisle's eyes became concerned. He probably thought I was crazy, going around accusing his adopted daughter of stopping enormous, heavy trucks with nothing but sheer mental determination. I really was losing the plot.

"No. That...sounds wrong even to my ears. We must have crushed; I had to have hit my head or something." As I said it, my fingers stretched up, probing my skull for any tell-tale bumps. That would explain this situation once and for all.

I found nothing, just smooth, unblemished skin. I didn't even have a headache. All the symptoms I'd been feeling from my leukaemia seemed to have numbed completely as well. Morphine was probably behind that.

"Sometimes head injuries don't leave physical wounds." Carlisle said sceptical, taking a couple of steps forward until his cool fingertips touched the spot my hand had froze on. Even someone as talented as Doctor Carlisle didn't have an explanation for what had happened.

Somehow I knew my leukaemia had something to do with my lack of injury and my fainting spell. It was a shame I couldn't tell Alice that.

"Do you think it was caused from my leukaemia?" I asked, gnawing my bottom lip as I checked the hospital room anxiously to check no one was listening in.

Carlisle and I were the only two present. He contemplated his answer momentarily as he continued checking my head for imaginary injuries. I might know they weren't there but he didn't seem satisfied until three minutes later, when he'd finished his examination.

"I think your medical condition-leukaemia-might have affected your energy levels. With enough stress in a pressurised situation I think its safe to say that the leukaemia simply helped to wear your body down to the point of it closing off its circuits, therefore rendering you unconsciousness." I got what I needed from the last part of Carlisle's statement; the rest was lost on me.

Yes, my leukaemia was to blame.

"You should be returning home later tonight if everything's fine. There's not much the hospital can do for you I'm afraid." Carlisle sounded extremely remorseful, like he wished that wasn't the case. I'd accepted my leukaemia long ago. It wasn't such a bother to me.

My time was precious and I'd be damned if I was going to waste it worrying about the future and what was waiting for me once I died.

Seconds before Carlisle picked up my chart and signed something in his perfect, elegant hand-flicking the pen just like Edward did-Angela's face rose in my mind. I'd completely forgotten about her. I had been planning to visit her at some point.

"How's Angela Carlisle? Angela Weber?"

"She's the victim from this morning's crash isn't she? You really do have the worst luck Bella, hospital twice in one day." I wasn't so keen to hang around not doing anything for hours like last time though.

"She was fine. A small bump to the head, a minor concussion. She must have hit the floor extremely hard."

"I could swear she didn't hit the floor hard at all. Edward just pushed us down slightly. Surely he couldn't have exhorted enough force to actually cause that damage?" From the way I phrased my sentence, it sounded like I was accusing Edward of inhumane things that he couldn't possibly have accomplished and I blushed, ashamed of my quick questioning. Me and my big mouth.

"I'm sorry Carlisle. That came out wrong."

"It's quite alright Bella. No, I personally don't think Edward is strong enough to throw you both onto the floor to cause something like a concussion, even a minor one. Emmett is more of the right body capacity for that kind of incident." That was true. I'd met Emmett at lunch on my first day at school and he'd towered over me in both height and build.

He could easily squash me like an ant without even realising. I felt so small beside him.

"Ok. I've signed all your release sheets. Charlie should be back in about five minutes. He went to get some coffee I think. Apparently the stress was working on his nervous system." Poor Charlie. He'd gotten that phone call this morning and it had scared the life out of him.

He wouldn't let me out of the house; out from the safety guaranteed behind closed doors if I continued to put myself into these situations.

"You mean I can go home? When Charlie gets back?" Carlisle nodded with a truly breath-taking grin plastered on his face.

Like he'd heard me mention his name; Charlie came slinking to the room with a boiling, sizzling cup of coffee in a white, foam cup. His refreshment was forgotten when he noticed me in my awakened state.

"Bella…you're awake. Thank God."  
"Yeah, I'm sorry Charlie…I think I may had totalled your homecoming present."

"As you're okay kiddo." He said; his eyes peaceful yet troubled at the same time. Carlisle shifted uncomfortably behind me, and after a moment of silence, the kind doctor excused himself and left swiftly from the private hospital room. Maybe he was going to check on Alice's condition.

"So…what actually happened Bells?"

"I lost my concentration. It was a complete surprise; honestly, I didn't have all that much time to react. I'm just glad Alice managed to get out, I wouldn't be able to carry on knowing I was responsible…" The very mental idea of hurting Alice because of my reckless driving hurt me deep down, somewhere I didn't even know existed.

"Well…we're finished here, that's if you feel ok to come home Bells. Doctor Cullen said it would be ok if you decided to spend the night in case of any side effects or such." Charlie was anxiously awaiting an answer; twiddling his thumbs on a broken piece of the white foam.

"I think…I'll come home. I don't want to spend a second longer than necessary in hospital." I said finally, kicking my aching and bruised feet over the edge of the white, hospital bed. My father was there in another second; offering his support with a well-worn hand.

After ten minutes of dragging my zip-up jacket onto my withered form and tying up my laces on my dirty trainers; Charlie took a good grip on my forearm and helped me hobble outside.

When we reached the cruiser; Charlie opened the protesting door; helping me position myself inside so I was comfortable. After three minutes of wiggling around to get comfortable and Charlie's consistent comments about not sparing any expense when it came to repairing my truck; I was relieved when he slid into the driver's side and tuned up the car with the key.

The relief didn't last long.

"What happened Bells? I know you. You don't just…lose control when you're driving. You're responsible. Were you hurting? You should have swapped with Alice and she could have driven you down. Or you could have forgotten about the trip and taken a time out. You've got plenty of time." Part of me weaselled away from telling Charlie that I'd crashed because I'd over-reacted to something Alice had said, while another part of me wanted to point out that the time I had on this world was running drastically low.

In the end, I didn't mention either.

"Dad…I don't know what happened. Honestly; I think…I just…I don't know how to explain it, I just lost control on the steering for a moment;" True enough; I just hadn't mentioned that I'd lost control of the steering of my own accord, "And the truck veered away." Charlie considered his next line of conversation extremely carefully before he changed the subject.

While he sorted through eventualities in his mind; probably jumping to conclusions –as a worried father would- I played the events of the evening in my mind.

Carlisle had said that I'd passed out before the contact; yet I was 99% certain that I'd witnessed Alice Cullen stop the out-of-control, skidding truck just like her brother had the morning before. I might be dying but my memory wasn't gone yet. There was no way I'd imagined what had happened.  
"Bells…From the looks of the truck, it hit something pretty solid at a fast speed. The bonnet has a huge dent in it; almost like it has been destroyed by a weapon of some kind." If I told Charlie not to worry about the bonnet because my little friend Alice Cullen had collided with it and survived without a scratch to her name he would probably call the medical staff from the hospital and I'd spend my last days trying to explain my hypothesis.

That wasn't such an appealing option.  
"Yeah; it must have hit a tree or something. Doctor Cullen said I was out before the impact so I wouldn't know." Charlie took that explanation half-heatedly as he continued his grilling.

"Are you sure you were unconscious during the collision Bells? I don't think it's…"

"Dad…" I interrupted. How could I lie to him when he was stressing himself out over a situation I'd been the cause of?  
"No, I'm over-reacting Bells. I just…with the accident this morning and now this…I'm starting to think someone is trying to take you away from me before your time; and that just scares me more than I can ever explain."

"This might sound uncanny dad; but I think I do understand." While Charlie reversed from the parking lot and fiddled with the dials on the switched off radio I looked out the misted window.

The surrounding trees looked like looming bodyguards ten times taller than the average one. They were daunting and imposing; the half crescent moon hung above; suspended like a star in the sky. Even as I thought that; dozens of dazzling, beautiful stars blinded me as I looked up at the shadowed black of the sky.

It really was a breath-taking night.

The oddest thing however; were the luminous gold orbs that reflected back from the light caused by Charlie's headlights right in front. It was obviously some kind of animal watching up in territorial protection or something like it.

What human had gold eyes that bright and inhuman?

My question died in my mind; my pondering finished up. I knew a person –a group of people- with eyes that gold, that inhumane.

The Cullens.

I'd called them angels; but looking outside now at the wilderness behind me I wasn't so sure. Maybe they were something I couldn't –and wouldn't- be able to ever understand. Whatever they were; I was dead certain those accidents this morning and this afternoon had been prevented by the Cullens. Edward and Alice to be exact.

How I'd explain that to Charlie was another matter entirely. Maybe it'd be easier if I didn't tell Charlie that the Cullens weren't human. My fear of ending up in a mental institute for the last week or two of my life was raw.

That wouldn't happen to me. I was sure on that one point if not on anything else.

"You've gone very quiet Bells. Are you okay?" Charlie asked as he accelerated slightly. Up to 40. While one hand controlled the rubber wheel –sweaty fingerprints were curled around the edges- his other hand itched his chin thoughtfully.

"Yeah, I was just thinking…"  
"About what?" He asked curiously when I didn't finish my sentence. His hand continued to itch for an extra second before it came down to join the other after finishing up. At that exact moment another car came hurtling down the opposite direction.

"I should really pull those disrespectful kids over. Racing in the middle of the night without lights on is one of the most dangerous things they could do around here." He'd forgotten about me for now.

Charlie hated it when youths sped down the roads like they owned them. Mainly I think it's because my father is the one who has to solve their suspicious deaths and tell their distraught families what has happened to them. His respect for those kind of teenagers died a while ago.

"You can go after them and pull them up if you want dad." I offered. I knew the only reason he wasn't pursuing at the moment was because I was inside the vehicle and there was a chance these guys might get rowdy when he pulled them over.

"No. You need to get home before you get a cold or something. You're more important to me kiddo." Before I could argue with Charlie's final decision the car's taillights had disappeared into the shadows and Charlie was toddling along down the road, getting closer and closer to our white, terraced house.

The regretful sparkle in his eyes told me everything though. He'd hated to let those kids off the hook for speeding when it was so dangerous.

Why didn't he understand that I didn't want to be a pain to him? The only thing he'd accomplished right now was almost overwhelming himself with guilt.

He didn't even know who'd been speeding.

The night passed slowly. Sleep refused to grace me with its presence; and in the end I didn't even attempt to close my eyes and escape from reality.

That's when I heard it.

Something rustled outside. My eyes latched onto the oak which leant towards my bedroom and I checked the darkness with my sleep-laced eyes. I might not have gone to sleep but I was still groggy and slow. It was 4 in the morning after all.

At first I couldn't figure out what I was picking up with my eyesight. It didn't move, but the shape –the shadow- was distinctly familiar; human-like.

Of course; it was hard to scrutinise the shadow anyway because my bead curtain blocked most of the stranger. I could tell that he was tall –extremely tall- and he was slumped slightly to get a good eyeful of the room in one glance.

The only part of him that was startling to recognise were the vibrant, vivid gold eyes.

Edward's eyes.

They shared his tender sparkle of excitement and the forbidden glow that always managed to dazzle me into silence.

"Edward?" My bead curtain might have blocked the view but I could still identify him from a mile away. His eyes were all I needed to know his identity. I'd spent long enough fantasising about them.

He didn't answer my silent question. At that moment all I wanted was to hear his sweet voice ringing in my ears. Why wouldn't he speak to me? Had I done something wrong?  
"Edward please. Don't hide outside. Come in, please." In the blink of an eye; the figure disappeared from his perch on the tree and I was left with a bare imprint of his image in my mind. Already I was imagining parts of him that hadn't been visible to me.

After five minutes of staring blankly at the tree outside; wishing, pleading, hoping he'd come back, I gave in and scrambled into bed.

I fell asleep in seconds.

My dream was confusing to say the least. I kept seeing golden eyes in the darkness. I had no idea what surrounded me; the only sensation that my senses could pick up was darkness. The kind of darkness that your eyes can't adjust to, the kind of darkness you can fall into for eternity and never know how and when to stop.

As I quivered from the evil behind the dark –the only other thing present with me in this endless landscape- the eyes got closer; and took on shapes. Human shapes.

A huge, bulking form who gained curly brown hair and gold eyes. Emmett.

A petite, bouncy form who reminded me of a dancing pixie in the summer. Alice.

A goddess in human form with her radiant blonde hair. Rosalie.

A lion waiting to pounce with energetic curls and a fierce, loyal air around him. Jasper.

A sweet, caring doctor who didn't want to leave his true love out there alone when she needed him close. Carlisle.

An unidentified person who I'd never met before. She was slim and tall, with kind eyes laced in the same gold as the others. I assumed my brain was showing me the way I envisioned Esme, Dr Cullen's wife.

The last image was the most amazing though. He was the angel I longed to see; my angel hopefully. Truthfully, in my dream he walked straight over to me without hesitation, with each step he took the darkness receded, showing me a world I had never seen before.

The grass was greener; the sky was a shocking shade of red, like a flickering flame on a candle; like it was mid-morning. With each step, new things appeared. I became hyper-aware of nature showing itself to me; alive and bursting with energy.

Everything I'd lost to my leukaemia; everything I was going to lose had been restored to a better quality. This was the type of vision I never got and the type I'd never have in a week's time.

The angel before me –the only Cullen I could settle my eyes on- took everything but my sense away from me. When he finally drew level with me, I ran my shaking hands down his cool forearms and inhaled his scent strongly.

That's when things started to change. Things bubbled in my vision, sharpening, becoming even more refined. My skin turned a paler shade of white worthy of a corpse. The shaking running through my entire form faded away into nothing.

Control had been returned to me.

Edward smiled heart-breakingly and leant down until his teeth were at my throat.

That's when his intoxicating voice broke my trance.

"Bella. You can be everything we are, you can escape something that you're not ready for. I can't lose you." He started littering kisses on my neck and I almost moaned in pleasure. His family hung back, but their smiles were warm and encouraging; even Rosalie who'd basically growled at me on my first day of school.

"All you have to do is say yes. All you have to do is understand what we are." Eagerly, I nodded and glanced up to meet his trusting, equally warm eyes.

"Tell me. I promise I can understand it, I can accept it. I know I can, I swear." His smile was rhetorical as he leant down right near my ear and started nibbling the skin.

After a breath; he opened his mouth and his cool breath shot down my sensitive skin, sending shivers down my skin.

"We're…"  
That's when I woke up.

Stray sunlight rays shone in against my eyelids; and my beautiful illumination of a dream disappeared before I'd even managed to grasp it with both hands.

I didn't want to wake up; I wanted to stand there with Edward and his family for the rest of eternity. It would have been ok with me if that was heaven and I'd died in my sleep.

The only thing that bothered me about the whole thing was the unanswered question. It was already nagging at my mind; and I had a feeling it related back, somehow to what had happened with the accidents. The Cullens were something I couldn't figure out. A mystery.

And that was what drew me even further into the mystery surrounding them. I hated not knowing things. It annoyed me and buried itself deep into the core of my mind; demanding to be solved of its puzzle.

"Bells?" Something tapped lightly on my door –Charlie's fist no doubt- and he let himself in without even bothering to reply. Nice to know he'd dropped his "privacy" issues. The accidents yesterday had obviously made him a lot more protective.

He dived right in with the reason for his visit.  
"I want you to stay home today Bells. Maybe even for tomorrow as well. I want you to be safe." His words from last night played in my head like a broken record. He'd told me that it felt like someone was trying to pull me away from him before he got his chance to have a happy moment with me.

If I was going to be at home and Charlie was going to be away at work until late tonight it was the perfect opportunity to plant some of his goodbye mementoes. This time a little better placed than the baseball glove. What had I been thinking? Of course he'd find something that was hidden under his pillow! He slept on it; he'd feel the lump and wonder immediately what sort of object would cause it. Charlie was a police officer; he questioned everything. Which is why I should have expected his response when I accepted what he said without a word or complaint, especially after I'd kicked up such a fuss about returning to school both yesterday after the first accident and when I'd originally come to Forks.

With a sigh, Charlie sank down onto my sweaty sheets and looked me in the eyes; deep into them –probably checking for trauma or signs of a concussion- and sighed again.

"What are you planning Bells?"  
"I just...I have some homework to do. I'd like to finish school with a clean slate." Charlie didn't understand the point I was trying to make.  
"Bells, I don't think homework matters where you're going." He winced as his memory helped him visualise exactly where I'd be going to him in a week's time. Two tops.

It was like I was a train running down the track; and I could see the broken metal and slashed wooden planks up above but I couldn't stop cruising, so I just enjoyed the time I had left before I ran overboard and was ended permanently.

The saying was true; that you never know what you have until you're going to lose it all. It was suddenly becoming painfully clear to me that I'd die, I'd leave this Earth. no more dreams, no more Cullens, no more Charlie, Renee or Phil. No more Forks or Phoenix. Whatever was waiting beyond was a mystery I wasn't ready to face. It scared me to think of being alone out there, somewhere in the dark just in my dream.

What if the afterlife really was like that? Without the Cullens there the dark had been terrifying. Things had been prowling in it; they'd hunted me by the stench of my fear. How could I fall "asleep" knowing that was waiting for me?

How could anyone succumb to that fate without a fight?

"Bells." Charlie's concerned features increased tenfold and he made a grab for some sort of radio clipped to his blue vest with its gold buttons.  
"I'm going to take the day off, stay here and look after you in case something happens. You look pasty Bells, like a..." I was pretty sure the word "corpse" was trying to wiggle its way out of his mouth; but something inside him stopped it viciously and through it away with a vengeance.

If I wasn't ready than I wasn't sure how to classify Charlie. To him, my death was like a guillotine balancing above his head. How he'd cope when I passed away I had no idea...

"No Charlie. You need to catch up with what happened last night. You might be able to find the car that was speeding. Knowing you, you probably took a note of the license plate for future reference." From the guilty look on Charlie's face I'd hit the mark exactly. Before he could comment on my condition if he left me alone; I gently kicked my beaten legs out of bed and stretched my arms high into the air; emphasising the "I'm awake and kicking" message.

"Honestly dad; I'll be fine on my own. Plus I have your number if I need you."

"Yeah, but Bells, knowing you, you won't phone me even if you're in trouble." I wasn't the only one who knew how to push Charlie's buttons. His words were the truth no matter how much I tried to deny it. He had a job to do; how could I keep him from it in such a selfish way? There were people out there who needed his help; people he could help. He owed them his service.

"You know me well Charlie, but I swear, if it gets bad I'll get myself to bed, out of trouble. I promise." The confliction blazed through his eyes, but his desire to watch out for the citizens of Forks won out; with a little more prompting.  
"Plus, all you're going to do if you hang around here is watch television when you could be out there preventing crime. What if something happens while you're not on duty?" It was a low blow; using his conscience to get him to leave but I didn't have a choice.

I couldn't plant his goodbyes unless he was away for a good few hours; with him watching me over my shoulder all day I wouldn't be able to go to the bathroom without him putting his ear to the door in case I collapsed or something.

I knew Charlie.

"Are you sure you're going to be ok Bells?"  
"I swear on my life." I answered earnestly, making a big show of clambering out of my inviting bed with its silky covers.

"Ok. I'll see you later kiddo. Take care of yourself." With those final words, he left my room –gently closing the door- and disappeared downstairs. Seconds later the front door closed and the sound of an engine roared into life from a distance away.

Ok; I had some time on my own, now, what did I do with it?

It took me several minutes of deep thinking to decide on what memento I'd gift Charlie with first. I'd decided on the three I was going to plant around the house already –I'd even chosen the hiding places.

The first object was wrapped up nice and tight at the back of my suitcase containing the presents I'd bought. Crackly paper reacted with my fingertips caressing touch as I gently peeled away the protection; revealing a small, travel-suited cactus in a plastic container the colour of beech wood washing up on a shore somewhere warm and exotic. The spikes had been sharpened back in Phoenix; and thankfully no one had stopped my baggage from being sent through customs even if they did think my goodbyes were threatening. I wanted Charlie to have something that reminded him of Phoenix; of the blistering hot sunshine and the pleasant noisy atmosphere you could just get lost in. It was a part of me he'd never get to know.

The second object was a lot smaller. One weekend after I'd been diagnosed with my leukaemia, Renee and Phil had taken me on a walk down the cool summer shore and I'd spied a small shop –with lace white trimming and purple bricks- hidden away, off the coastal path. With a little persuasion; Renee had allowed me to hobble inside to peer around.

It had been an occult store.

Dream catchers; bizarre, unique and awe-inspiring all at once lined the netted windows; which sparkled as the sun shot down from the sky like water dripping from a tap. The walls were half beech wood on the bottom –in horizontal planks which matched the whole "cultural" theme of the store perfectly- and the top half of the walls were painted a blood burgundy. The place had had a witchy type feel that's meant to come with the occult.

The floor had been solid wood; almost black in the dim lighting which adorned the store. Shelves upon shelves of hand-made crafted items, small, beaming dolls who appeared to know secrets I didn't understand and hundreds of battered, leather books had littered the shelves like spoils from a sunken treasure ship.

The dream catcher had caught my attention.

It contained through circles; one large one in the centre with a smaller one above and below. All three had been woven with brown and black thread; with the occasional white strand in there which made the circles look more realistic. Sunset red, ocean blue and ice cream coloured yarns had trapped patterns in the centre of each circle while golden beads with eagle engravings on golden thread as delicate as a spider's web connected the whole thing together. Brown and white speckled feathers hung from the beads; looking fresh and churning with life.

That's what I was giving Charlie now.

The dream catcher had been perfect for him; it represented everything he was. The three circles represented how balanced he was; how even headed. The threads in the middle showed his dedication and commitment to a project once it was started. The golden beads and thread symbolised his heart of gold while the eagles engraved on the beads stood for his bravery and courage. The feathers showed his uniqueness to the world.

Feeling proud of myself for thinking of this gift; because I knew Charlie would like it, I slipped from my bedroom –still in my fluffy pyjamas; a black tank top and blue leggings- and headed downstairs to plant my two presents.

The cactus was planted in the cupboard which the black cordless phone balanced on; right at the back behind phone books three years outdated and something icky which crawled across my hand.

The dream catcher...I couldn't explain it, but I couldn't lock it away inside a dingy drawer, waiting for months, maybe even years to be discovered. It deserved to blow in the wind, to be used to help people have pleasant dreams.

It had obviously been working for me last night. The intensity I'd dreamed Edward in...wow.

What had he been trying to tell me?

What could I possibly have to understand about him before I died? What had he been about to say when he'd leant forward to whisper in my ear?

It'd been so sweet; so tender. Everything I'd never had before; nothing I'd ever experienced in my life span. Why couldn't that happen in reality?

Somehow dreaming about it wasn't enough.

I wanted the real-life angel.

Utter perfection.

With those thoughts; I trailed back upstairs- tripping on the top stair and banging my already bruised knee- and winced slightly as I positioned myself to plop down on my bed sheets, the dream catcher latched on, dangling from the spaces in-between my fingers.

I knew exactly where it was going...and it wasn't going to Charlie. Not this one present.

It was meant for someone else. Someone with bronze hair.

A/N: Ok, I'm so, so, so sorry this has taken so long to get out. I've been busy, stressed and I have been suffering from severe writer's block, so sue me if I haven't updated.

It is also my fifteenth birthday today. I hope you enjoyed this chapter; please read and review your opinions. If you want anything in-particular written into this story –an Edward and Bella moment or a Cullen and Bella moment- just tell me and I'll try my hardest to make sure it's put inside.


	6. Chapter 6

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Six _

A Little Taste Of Heaven

After I'd made the decision to give Edward the dream catcher; the hard part for me was over. I always found it difficult and stressful to make the decisions, but once they were made and pushed to one side, I had no problem sticking to my guns and making the commitment I needed to them.

I hung around the house; finding already spotless floors to clean and fully stocked cupboards to shuffle around. After that I relented to whatever part of my mind that had been urging me to get a start on the homework I had lurking upstairs somewhere.

Sure, I was dying soon so I didn't necessarily need to do it; but it would be nice to have it done and dusted. I did have a couple of weeks left in that school, and I didn't need to spend them with teachers hounding me about work I wasn't giving in. Making the effort at school when I knew overall it would be pointless was taking its toll on me as well; not that I'd dare to repeat a word of my struggles to Charlie. He was going through enough, he was worried enough for my condition as it was; my making a point about school being boring –when I'd insisted I attended it- would only make him pull me out of high school so we could spend quality time together that he didn't have free. It'd be wrong to make him leave all the citizens of Forks Chief of Police less because I was making him spend my last weeks with me. I wasn't the only person who needed his services and his careful love and attention, it was going to be hard to accept that when I was dying but I knew I'd get there eventually.

Doing homework wasn't fun –although I already knew it wouldn't be- but I passed two whole hours completing the tedious task. It almost bored me to tears at some points –like when I had to find the fractional proportional percentage of pie or whatever- but I survived through the torture. Why on Earth would anyone going into work need to know something that complicated unless they were specifically becoming a maths professor or something similar? I couldn't imagine needing to know that if you wanted to be a convenience night clerk. It wasn't very likely.

After completing my homework –and continuing to wonder why you'd need to know the what's-it of pie- I settled down onto the couch and pressed on the remote; brining the screen eagerly to life. The first programme playing through on the television was some sort of soap, but I didn't hang around on that channel to learn the specifics. I didn't understand why people wasted their time watching soaps when real life was right in front of them, waiting to be turned into –as the saying goes- "a soap opera." Did people not realise –like I had once I'd learned I was dying- that every minute on this land; with our family and friends was priceless in its own unique way? Every fight, every cherished moment, they should all mean something important to us because once we lose them they won't be coming back, and we will miss them then. I was having these debates with myself more and more lately; and I was starting to think it was because I was getting lonely.

With Renee and Phil I'd had hardly any time to think. We'd always been doing something, some sort of last wish I didn't have or we'd be out on some trip or other doing something that I knew would give my mother and my step-father great closure. I didn't want to leave them in pain; but I knew I couldn't take away all the pain my mother would be feeling when I died, so I just settled for taking most of it and hoping she had people to cry on and support herself on for the rest.

The next programme to grace itself onto my television was a game of baseball. The sport kind. I had no idea which teams they were, and I had no urge to find out. With barely a glance at the screen, I flipped over again and kicked up my feet onto the couch so they were folded neatly in front of me while my finger played with a strand of loose thread on the fabric of the blue and white striped couches.

After the sport, the news came onto the screen and I leant forward slightly to get a better view.

"Last night, two bodies were found near the mall found in Port Angeles. No one knows how they were murdered or who by but it has been confirmed that Chief of Forks Police, Charlie Swan has arrived on the scene and discovered a bare, human footprint leading east." So that's what my father was doing. He was in Port Angeles helping to solve a murder. This sort of situation just added fuel to my debate however that Charlie had responsibilities to other people who weren't me. If he wasn't there right now to help track down the person who'd slaughtered those innocent people then who would honestly perform his job with the same dedication I knew my father put into his everything?

No one could protect the citizens of Forks better than my father; so Port Angeles was in good hands as well. I knew it in my heart.

Before my attention got a chance to fade back towards the television and the noise; which was blaring out the weather now (you guessed it, rain and clouds. No sun,) someone hit their fist against the wood of the front door. The sudden noise in the silence made me jump out of my skin, but I quickly slapped myself mentally for being scared of someone who was no doubt delivering something or other. I glanced at the clock on the mantelpiece and frowned. Four thirty. Wasn't it slightly late for someone to be delivering goods to my home this late in the evening?

Curious, I pulled myself up from the couch with some grunting effort and made a sprinting trip to the front door. At first I thought I was actually going to make the journey unwounded –which would be a first- but my confidence was shattered when my foot caught on the loose carpeting in the entrance hall and I shot forward; catching my nose on the door handle of the front door. Almost immediately pain sparked through my system and I groaned as I rubbed the delicate spot. Relief shot through me however when my fingers came away clean; not an ounce of blood visible. The last thing I needed was to have a fainting spell right in my own home. Charlie wouldn't let me return to high school if I showed signs of getting beaten already by my leukaemia. With new found determination, I straightened up and ignored the throbbing which was passing through my nose from the unnecessary contact with a brass door knob. I was all smiles as I opened the door to unveil...Alice Cullen, practically bouncing up and down with excitement.

"Bella! I missed you at school today. How are you? I'm so sorry about your truck; I'd be glad to pay the bill for the repair work." She was dressed up warm today; which made sense because it was actually quite cold this time of year; especially in Forks. She had a fashionable knitted hat covered her straightened pixie curls which had a small black and blue flower sewn on the side, adding character to the accessory. Her hands were covered with matching knitted gloves while a collection of white, black and blue bangles finished up the accessories. She had a plain white tunic on with a midnight blue long jumper over the top. Jean-like leggings were on her feet paired with black fabric boots which I knew would never fit me in a million years. Alice was small for someone in her junior year at high school.

Comparing her outfit against mine –which consisted of a rugby shirt and a pair of my old sweats-, I wasn't feeling all that confident standing beside such an angel with great fashion sense.

"Hi Alice. I..." With down at myself I concluded what I was about to say; "I wasn't expecting company. Come on inside." Alice hesitated for a second; and I followed her gaze to the idling Volvo on the curb; which had the bronze-haired God whom I was crushing on desperately in the driver's seat. The other three Cullen teenagers –Jasper, Rosalie and Emmet I think- were all crammed in the back seat, watching the exchange between Alice and I with mixed emotions showing on their face. Emmett was at a crossroad between impatient and excited while Rosalie just looked resentful of stopping her at all. Jasper wasn't looking in my direction; the tight scrunch of his jaw suggested he was trying not to look at my home. I wondered momentarily why the Cullen didn't like me or my home but I didn't voice the question.  
"I've...got something on tonight. I just came to hand these to you with an official apology. I shouldn't have distracted you last night. It's my fault the whole accident was...well...it's my fault we crashed. I didn't realise we'd end up in _hospital_." Her tone was one of outright disgust and disbelief and I chuckled against my will at her twisted up expression.  
"I've spent my fair share of time in hospitals. It's nothing new to me." I hadn't realised what I'd admitted until Alice gave me an unusual, questioning look; like she wanted to ask why I needed to spend so much time in hospitals. Before she could voice those questions –from what I'd seen of her I'd expect nothing less- I interrupted.

"Don't worry about the truck. I've got some money saved up in my college fund. I can repair it."

"That's another reason I came actually. I wanted to offer you a ride to and from school until your truck gets fixed. It's the least I can do."  
"That's not really necessary..." Before I could finish my polite refusal Alice took something out of her small blue satchel –high quality leather from the looks of it- and handed it over to me, pointing at the first small folder on the top.  
"The teacher said to make sure you knew only to do the first topic. It's a month project. The other things are just small...I think there's an essay in there though on how Shakespeare uses Romeo and Juliet's relationship to eventually drive a wider wedge between the two families and themselves." The sound of that essay made me quite giddy. Romeo and Juliet was one of my favourite classics works by Shakespeare. I enjoyed doing assigned work on the book because I understood its messages and underlying meanings a lot easier than most people. Somehow I managed to relate their situations to real life; reality. Their time really was the same as ours; the only difference is that we face different circumstances now then they did; and sometimes our time can be more judgemental. The worst punishment for loving the wrong person in those times was death. Nowadaways we have methods of torture and separation which could easily break both people concerned. Things were sometimes easier before humanity managed to excel and change things for the "better" even though sometimes I find myself wondering whether it was for the worst.

"Ok." I gently took the things from Alice's outstretched arms, forcing myself not gasp when my quivering hands (sweaty probably, a sad side effect of my condition) collided with her cool, collected ones. When she was sure I had them in my grip; she smiled and took a step further back; back to her vehicle. She obviously had somewhere to be.

"Thank you." I told her seriously. She'd given me something to do until Charlie got home; and judging from the news on the television he'd still be out for a while.

"You're welcome." Before I could say anything else she was retreating; basically skipping back to Volvo; which had the passenger door open and waiting for her to enter so they could take off. I suddenly remembered that I hadn't assured Alice that she didn't need to pick me up and drop me off in the mornings and nights. It wasn't fair to make her waste her time because I'd been stupid enough to crash my Chevy truck when I overreacted to something.

"Alice..." Before I could finish my line of thought and my sentence she'd already closed the passenger door and they were gliding away silently while she waved goodbye until they turned the corner and disappeared. That caused me to sigh again. Great; I hadn't been able to reassure Alice that she didn't need to waste her time and I didn't have a contact number for her to pass on the message. Well; I'd just have to mention it to her tomorrow morning and hope for the best. I didn't want to offend anybody by rejecting a sweet offer which had obviously come from the depths of Alice's heart.

Once I'd gone back inside and retreated up to my bedroom to complete the homework Alice had handed me; I'd forgotten all about Alice's assurance that I had a ride to and from school.

Why on Earth had I chosen to go back to school in my last few weeks of living?

Would I need calculus in the afterlife?

Charlie returned home just before ten o'clock. His stomping feet and jostled movements gave him away to me; and with a relinquished sigh, I packed up the book I'd been reading –a battered copy of Wuthering Heights- and headed down to ask him how his day had been.

I found him untying his thick material boots with anxious, jerky movements. With a famished sigh he unlocked the first one and kicked it off so it skidded several feet across the kitchen. I took his jacket from the kitchen table –where it'd been folded beside his gun- and left the kitchen to hang it on its hook. Charlie joined me a second later, with his gun and boots in hand. Once everything had been replaced in their appropriate places; we both went into the kitchen and took seats.

I hadn't had anything to eat yet; but I hadn't prepared anything either. Without having to be asked, I got back to my aching feet and picked up the cordless phone; searching through the phone book on the side until I found a decent pizza delivery place which promised delivery within half an hour twenty four hours a day. It rang three times before a bored sounding person picked up the line with a sigh.

"Hello, this is Domick's Pizza Parlour. Can I take your order?" Placing a hand over the receiver I mock-whispered to Charlie.  
"What do you want?"  
"Whatever you're having Bells."  
"Pepperoni, light on the cheese?" I double checked; smiling at something small we'd found comfort in. Every little moment was precious in mine and his eyes. Charlie smiled and rose to his feet; heading towards the kettle. When he gestured towards a mug I'd had since I was six I smiled and nodded, motioning that I'd like a drink if he was having one. While Charlie clattered and banged, assembling two cups of tea with milk and one sugar, I spoke back into the receiver.

"Yes, I'd like a large pepperoni pizza light on the cheese please."

"What's the address?" The gangly voice demanded in an almost cold tone. I made a note not to leave a tip for this particular person; especially if they delivered the food. I recited my address to her and hung up before her unfriendliness could go onto the next level, which would really offend me.

"You seem ticked off Bells." Charlie acknowledged as he handed me the prepared, steaming cup of tea with a weak smile. Sighing once more in frustration; I slumped into the colourful kitchen chair and used the heat radiating from the ceramic cup to warn my hands while I worked myself up to explain why I was in a bad mood. Charlie took the seat opposite me and sipped once, twice, thrice from his cup before setting it down and staring evenly at me.

"Its hit home hasn't it?"  
"What?" I stared at him blankly. What on Earth was he getting at?

"The leukaemia. Leaving. It's hitting home with you."  
"No, of course not. I understand that...everything that's happening to me can't be stopped; I accepted that long ago. The problem is that I want desperately to make other people realise what they have, and they're just letting it slide past unnoticed. Why doesn't anyone understand how precious your time is on this planet?" I hadn't meant to unleash my frustration on my unsuspecting father who'd no doubt been dealing with a murder case earlier today but the questions slipped from me uncontrollably. Charlie took another sip of his smoking tea before even attempting a reply.

"I think it takes something...potentially life threatening to make you understand truly what you have here; and because most people live their lives sheltered from harm and hurt...they don't get to experience that high and face the realizations afterwards." I considered what my father had said. Was that how most people worked in this day and age? They stayed inside the safe confides of their little squares, not doing anything potentially dangerous in case it hurt them in any way, shape or form. Yet I also understood now that if you didn't do something dangerous and exhilarating then you'd regret it because you'd never feel the adrenaline rush which our bodies crave.

Dying was like that adrenaline rush. I was excited to see what was waiting for me on the other side but a larger, more potent part of myself was scared to leave those I loved behind me, to leave everything I was familiar with behind. That part of me wanted to reverse time and destroy the cancerous cells which were ending my time with the sun and sky; with night and dark, the stars and the natural beauty of the planet. Those were just the natural components on this Earth. The man-made things I'd miss were even stronger, and they inspired sour emotions in me. I'd never be able to go to University, I'd never be able to marry and have children. Travelling the world could be nothing but a false memory in my dreams when I fell asleep.

It was horrifying to think that I wouldn't even be sleeping once I died. No more dreaming; no more answers within the essence of your heart. As mean and evil as it was; sometimes I wished my fate on someone else just so I could continue living this life I'd made for myself. I knew what I had now; I begged and pleaded with whoever it was up there for it not to be too late for me but I knew in my heart I was going to die, I couldn't stop fate.

"Ok...we're going to end this conversation because it's only going to depress us both." Charlie didn't look like he agreed with me, but he reluctantly nodded and let me change the subject anyway.  
"I saw the news this afternoon. Did you find any leads on the Port Angeles murder? It must have been terrible finding those bodies like that and then having to search out the murderer."  
"We have no clue whatsoever as to whom it was. They didn't leave anything; just a footprint which was imprinted into some mud. What can we do with a footprint? Everyone has different feet but we don't register them on networks. The idea never came into the police force's mind." Charlie seemed to be kicking himself for _not _thinking about such a stupid idea. Who would honestly want to scan people's feet in a database in case footprints were left at a crime scene? It didn't help that most people –criminals included- wore shoes, which meant their footprints would be obscured and the prints would be useless anyway.

"It wouldn't have helped dad. Don't beat yourself up over it." I stretched across the table and took his large hand in my smaller one; trying to comfort him. I knew what he got like when he couldn't solve a crime. It'd almost killed him last night when he'd brought me back from the hospital and that person had been speeding. Letting them go unpunished...Charlie hadn't been very happy. I was surprised he hadn't noted the number plate to take up the matter later.  
"I know it wouldn't have helped kiddo...but...I can't help thinking that those two people, those dead people now; their families will want the murderer found as a type of justice and all we offer is something we can't even use. It makes me feel so useless. What good am I at my job if I can't even find a murderer who is stupid enough to leave evidence? There has to be something somewhere."

"Dad..." My grip on his hand tightened and I frowned at him.

"Listen to me. You do what you can to help people. You do a lot to help people. Everything possible. Don't blame yourself when the one case you get that you can't solve is the one that bothers you the most. It's only natural to stress over things you can't do anything about. Do you know what normally helps with me when I'm in those situations?" Charlie's smile was back –and I didn't miss the way his teeth stuck out at cute, little odd angles when he smiled at me- and he nodded for me to continue my speech.

"A full stomach, a refreshing shower and a good night's sleep." Charlie smiled at my antidote to his frustration at not being able to solve a crime and ruffled my hair; disconnecting our hands as he wandered into the living room to watch TV until the pizza arrived. It took a good forty five minutes before a youngish teenager boy pulled up on a noisy moped with a rapidly cooling pizza box; but the food was cheap and we were extremely hungry, so I paid the kid and stuck the pizza in the microwave to reheat. Charlie grabbed some plates and filled two glasses with water while I took out the box and laid four slices each onto our appropriate plates.

My dad gobbled them up as quickly as possible without hesitation while I just took feeble little bites. It was almost half past eleven by the time we'd finished with our cold-crusted pizza and it'd been washed away with the cutlery. Our conversation had centred on what had happened yesterday and what I'd been doing today. When I mentioned to Charlie that Alice had dropped my work off for me; he seemed happy that I'd made a friend in my last days who wasn't in hospital.

"How is Angela by the way?" Charlie asked as we both settled on the couch. It might have been late but neither of us was tired; well, Charlie insisted he wasn't tired but I saw the way his eyes kept drooping, which gave him away.  
"I don't know. I didn't phone the hospital today." I told him honestly. Guilt suddenly spread strongly through my system. I'd had all this free time today and I hadn't even spared a thought for Angela's welfare. How selfish could you get?

"Don't worry about it Bells. I'm sure she's fine. You can always phone after school tomorrow." That sentence brought a smile to my face.

"I can go back to school?"  
"On one condition. You promise not to scare me like that again?"  
"We both know I can't promise that Charlie. I'm a natural born klutz. I'll try and return in one piece. How is that for a promise?" Charlie pretended to consider my words for a moment before chortling and nodding in agreement.  
"Two more days of school Bells and then you've got the weekend stretching out in front of you. What do you want to do?"

"Well...Saturday I thought we'd go down to La Push. You mentioned seeing your old friends Billy Black and his children. Did you say his son was called Jacob? Jonathon? Something along those lines. I thought maybe on Sunday we could go fishing or something. Some time between us." Charlie smiled; genuinely for the first time since I'd arrived.

"I'd love that Bells. We'll have to be extra careful though, fishing plus Bella is a dangerous mix. Especially with hooks, sharp pointed objects." We both laughed at that joke. When Charlie yawned –trying to stifle it with his hand in an "I'm just stretching" move- I sighed and almost shooed him away upstairs.

"Charlie. You're tired. Go to bed. I'll be fine." I spoke in short, clipped sentences to show how serious I was. My father sighed; but another yawn won him over and he retreated upstairs. I found it quite amusing how he hadn't demanded I be in bed as well like a normal parent would; especially considering I had school tomorrow.

That fact eventually made me retreat up the stairs to my warm, welcoming bed. Why hadn't I come to bed sooner? The clocks tolled midnight outside as well as the one Charlie had on the mantel downstairs. They made unusual chiming sounds which acted as my lullaby as I lay; changed on top of my bed covers, waiting for sleep to rouse up and claim my mind.

Once more; on the twelfth chime I was fast asleep.

I was so lost in my daydreams before I fell asleep that I didn't notice the guardian angel outside my window; silently watching over me.

I was just washing up my breakfast bowl when I heard the knocks on the door. I'd informed Charlie that I had arranged a ride to and from school with my friends from now on...until...well, I hadn't had to specify. I had told him that my friend's just thought I was waiting for my truck to be repaired. When I died next week or the week after at some point it would surprise most people. I was well adapted to keeping my disease secret; and I thought I was doing a good job.

With a quick glimpse in the mounted mirror beside the front door; I proved to myself that I didn't look as much like a ghost as I usually did. For the first time in...a very long time...I'd actually put on some kind of make up which added colour to my cheeks and some lip gloss had brightened up my peeling lips considerably. My outfit had been picked with a little more attention. Instead of basic shirt and trousers; I'd selected a lacy white blouse with fluffy sleeves. I had a black waist belt tied on; paired with a pair of mid-length cropped three quarter length jeans and –after some serious thinking- I'd picked out some sandals Renee had forced me to pack, even if I didn't wear them.

There wasn't anything wrong with them. They were black and they were flat. It was the price of them that had sent me sky-rocketing. Renee had spent a fortune and she'd banned me from retuning them to the store, which in itself was more than expense. You needed to have a credit check to be let inside no doubt.

To match my clothes I'd washed and blow-dried my hair especially, so it was silky, wavy and controlled in a sense. Hidden in one of my small jewellery boxes I'd found on a dressing table in an abandoned drawer, I'd found a couple of black metal moulded butterfly burettes which I'd fitted in as well. I was wearing a silver necklace with a butterfly on the end and my family ring. Faced with a little more spare time, I'd painted my toenails and my fingernails a brighter pink to add to the illusion of life.

I didn't look as bad as I usually did.

"Hey Bella. I love your outfit by the way. You won't need a jacket, it's not cold." Alice was standing in the doorway, dressed in a red and black dress which reached her knees with silver leggings underneath. She was wearing silver stilettos with...extremely high heels. Her make up and hair looked like they'd been done professionally while for accessories she'd gone with black and red bangles, beads and chunky rings. She had a black and red leather bag which I guessed was Gucci from the label I could see on the side.

She smiled at me again as I stared at her in confusion.

"I said I'd give you a ride to school...but I don't own a car so Edward's car pooling with both of us." True to her word; her brother's Volvo was parked on the curb a couple of metres away, engine running with the passenger door and the backseat door hanging open. The other three Cullens weren't present; and for a fleeting second I was scared that I'd pushed them away from their way to school.  
"Alice, where's the rest of your family? I don't want to be the reason..."

"They took the other car. Rosalie wanted a reason to show it off anyway. I feel sorry for the idiot who scratches the paintjob." Still seemingly impatient she took my battered orange backpack and held it away from her in mild disgust.

"We still need to go shopping by the way. Your school bag proves that." Still holding it out of my grip she took a firm grab on my elbow and started to yank me outside.

"We're going to be late." She coaxed. Reluctant to ride in their car and cause them unnecessary distress but unwilling to be rude and to refuse their help straight off; I nodded and locked up the house as quickly as possible. As we walked to the Volvo Alice began a conversation on something I hated more than my leukaemia. Shopping.

"So...I was thinking we could either go on Friday or on Saturday if you're free. A whole day's probably better than half a day."

"I'm sorry Alice but I'm doing things with my dad down at La Push during the weekend. I'm not doing anything tonight or tomorrow though; and we have next week."

"And next weekend..." Alice mused, already making calculations as she slipped into the backseat without a comment, leaving my backpack in the passenger seat up front. I stared at her wordlessly for a moment, but in the end I just gave up and took the front seat without complaint. She'd done the same when Edward had taken me back to school on Tuesday after the accident with Angela.

"Ok. I have plan." Alice announced, sticking her head through the two front seats as soon as Edward pulled away from the curb and began driving. I saw him smile briefly at her enthusiasm before his attention went back to the road.

"Hit me Alice."  
"Ok..." She paused for dramatic effect; which almost made me laugh. Last time she'd tried to impress me I'd ended up crashing a vehicle and almost killing her. It was a good job Edward was driving this time. What were the chances I'd make him crash if I overreacted? He was a good driver; he didn't get easily distracted from what I'd seen.

"We go shopping in Port Angeles tonight because it's nearer so we get longer shopping. There's a dance coming up in a couple of weeks and we have to be there. It's going to be amazing." This is where I should have politely told her I wouldn't be attending because I was going to be buried by that time, but instead I nodded and remained polite.

"We'll find our dresses tonight...then on Friday we can just...hang out or something. I think that'd be nice. What do you think?"

"I like the last idea Alice. I'm not fond on the idea of shopping; especially when someone else is intent on paying." Edward coughed to cover up the chuckle which threatened to explode from his mouth but Alice still glared at him regardless. As soon as we pulled up in the school parking lot my mouth fell open and virtually hit the floor.

One of the most amazing, sleek cars was parked in the Cullens usual parking spot. Rosalie was leaning against the red BMW with unmasked pride in her expression, and when one senior guy got a little too close to it she shouted something rude at him. When he remarked with something I couldn't hear Emmett stood up from out of nowhere and the senior basically ran away with his tail between his legs. Emmett and Rosalie began kissing after that...very passionately. The other Cullen...Jasper, wasn't anywhere to be found.

My search was cut short when we pulled up in a parking space and Alice shot from the car like a bullet, heading over to Rosalie and Emmett, and what appeared to be Jasper hiding behind the car if that was even possible mean as it was a convertible. She kissed him quickly in greeting and they made their way inside. Emmett and Rosalie followed soon after, which left Edward and I alone, still sitting in his car.

Awkward.

What confused me however was that Edward didn't seem to be in a rush to leave the vehicle. Maybe it was because I was still sitting inside showing no signs of leaving and he didn't want to leave the equivalent of a stranger inside his car, and then the polite thing to have done would have been nod, say thank you and escape as quickly as possible.

I hadn't forgotten this morning to pack in the dream catcher I'd originally determined that I'd give to Edward either, so now would have been the perfect time to hand it over with a bold thank you. It would have given me a reason to leave as well.

"What are you thinking?" Edward suddenly asked out of the blue; turning round in the driver's seat so that he was staring directly at me with his whole body facing in my direction. The position itself wasn't all that different but the fact that he was starting a conversation willingly with me about my thoughts made my heart skip in beats.

Before I could stop myself speaking, the words came out of my mouth.

"I have something for you and I'm wondering what's the best way to give it to you without embarrassing either of us or starting bad rumours which aren't going to help our situation." It was hard to miss the pointed stares students shot at the Volvo; or at me and Edward in the front seat, lost in our little world. In a conversation I was enjoying.

"You have something for me?" When he smiled; he showed his perfect, pearly teeth and even the sight of those made me shiver in delight. Was there a part of him that wasn't perfect?  
"I do, but..." I was suddenly extremely nervous. How could I give him something so simple and plain when it was obvious he was rich and could afford something more unique and definitely something that'd be suited to him more? Why was I even trying to be in the same league as him when it was obvious we were out matched?  
"Forget it. Thinking about it I've just realised how stupid it is. You could probably go out and buy one easily." Blushing red I picked up my backpack from the floor of his passenger seat and reached for the door handle. Before I could so much as pressure the handle to open the door; a cold hand rested on my forearm and I turned around in surprise. Edward was smiling; his lips pulled back all the way in his friendliest facial expression.

"I'd love anything from you Bella; and it gives me and my sister more reason to buy you something in return." Okay; that made me regret so much as mentioning the dream catcher in the conversation. Shopping? Justified shopping with Alice Cullen and Edward Cullen? The people who seemed to have unlimited credit card access? A bad option to have locked myself in.

"It was a silly thing anyway..." Feeling exhilarated and awkward at the same time from his grip on my arm which was preventing me from leaving the vehicle, I wasn't sure whether to shrug it away or just stay still until he eventually dropped his arm. What was I meant to do in this situation without hurting his feelings?

"I'd like to know what it is. Won't you show me Bella?" The crooked smile and hypnotic eyes were back; and I didn't stand a chance against them. Still feeling like it was a failure when it came to a gift, I shook my head as a refusal.

"It's not...appropriate. You won't like it." I finally sighed, getting the words out. Edward just carried on with his dazzling gaze, and the sudden impulsive urge to lean forward ever so slightly and cover that vital distance between our heads; our lips was almost addictive. What would it take to kiss this God just once? Even if it seemed to be an accident? I knew he would never kiss back, and he'd probably pull back in disgust but at least I'd manage to finish one of my own personal aims on my wish list before I passed away.

Was it worth the risk?

My train of thought was lost when Edward's arm trailed off my forearm and moved up higher until his fingers were caressing my left cheek tenderly. Feeling like someone was trailing heaven's light down my skin already with his delicate touch; I leant into his hand and sighed against his skin. His touch put me under a spell which I was powerless to break.

"Please Bella." His voice just added to the blessed out effect. How could someone be so perfect and live here on this planet? In this world? He belonged in heaven, among angels and the clouds. All the highest, most deserving beings.

"Can I see what you want to give to me?" Without questioning my actions I leant down and disengaged the dream catcher from the front pocket of my orange backpack.

His eyes never left mine; his fingers still trailed along my skin; but slowly and steadily his touch receded as he clasped the dream catcher gently in his hands when I handed it over, being careful of the feathers at the bottom. As soon as his touch and eyes left my face the spell was broken.

The illusion I'd been under –of perfection, of heaven and him belonging with angels- faded, and I was left in a Volvo with a breath-taking, bronze-haired guy who was holding a gift I'd been determined not to give him. How had that happened?

He'd dazzled me I realised suddenly.

He'd used his good charms and amazing good looks to trick me into handing over the present I had for him.

I didn't know whether I was mad at him for doing that, up in the clouds because he'd been that close to me and it'd been amazing to feel his touch on my skin or worried that he wouldn't like my present. I did feel quite happy that he'd cared enough to want my present enough to dazzle it out of me; even if he'd done it against my will.

He continued examining it with wonder clear on his features as he took in each detail.

"I bought it back in Phoenix. I've been clearing out a few things and when I saw it...I immediately thought "Edward." If you don't want..."  
"Thank you." His tone wasn't his usual sarky one. It was filled with genuine pleasure. As I watched in shock and amazement, he hooked it onto the main mirror in his Volvo and sat staring at it for another full minute, raising his hand to touch the feathers with the gentlest touch a second after those minutes passed. I watched him with interest. I'd never seen someone be so careful with anything. Most people didn't realise the vulnerability of normal objects. They never stopped to consider it.

"It's mesmerising." Edward spoke in a hushed tone; one I could barely hear. I wasn't sure whether the comment was therefore made for me to hear and answer to or whether he was actually talking to himself. His eyes seemed drawn to it; like it was a magnet to him every time he tried to look around the school to see where everyone was.

The bell obviously hadn't rung yet; but the timing couldn't be far off because the parking lot was almost empty. The only people that remained were a few who were huddled at the far corner of the parking lot; and they were approaching the school entrance as well.

Time to get moving I suppose.

"Edward...we'll have to be getting into school soon. The bell's due to ring any minute." There seemed to be an impossible force still rooting me to the chair, refusing to let me leave until this had played out completely. Edward continued smiling as he nodded, showing he'd heard my statement.

Before I knew what was happening he leant forward and kissed me on the cheek.

The sudden contact sent sparks through my whole body. Electricity drilled into every nerve ending and set me alight, tingling with nerve pulses. Everything about Edward and that brief kiss was amazing, breath-taking, to die for. I'd sell my soul for that kind of contact a second longer. He smelt so sweet but spicy at the same time; like a balance between the most potent boutique and the most delicious delicacy.

From the playful, teasing glint in his eyes I was hoping he didn't see the intense reaction he'd inspired in me. No need to embarrass myself further. Underneath the playful glint in his eyes though I saw something else, buried in the depths of Edward's onyx like eyes. For a second I mistook it for regret; maybe he regretted kissing me on the cheek; maybe he regretted accepting the gift because it meant I'd be trying to get close to him now. As I looked closer I began to hope that maybe the emotion was something positive; like a genuine fondness.

How amazing would it be if Edward did actually _like _me as a person? If he did want to spend time with me because he liked _me_? What more could a girl ask for?

"Thank you Bella." He said sincerely; glancing at it again as he took the keys from the ignition of his Volvo.

Before I could properly move and disjoint my bag from the passenger seat, Edward had got out the driver's side and was standing there in a posh but polite manner with his hand extended to help me from his car; the passenger door open in his other hand. Feeling gifted to get some much hand-to-hand contact from the equivalent of a Greek Adonis I took his offered hand feeling giddy and light-headed.

My backpack spun round in my hands until I'd placed it on my shoulder; well, I tried to do that. Me being the idiot I am I managed to spin my backpack round and I forced it to hit me on the elbow; which in turn made me yelp and I dropped the back onto the floor while clutching my wounded limb. Edward scooped up the bag with one hand and put it onto his own shoulder while his hands quickly replaced my one as he checked my elbow with a serious expression on his face.

"Are you okay?"  
"Yeah. It was just a shock, sort of a jarring. It surprised me." I lied. He continued to prod at the sensitive spot for another minute or two, refusing to move until he was sure I was fine and it took all I had to grit my teeth and pretend I was fine. Eventually Edward sighed and backed off, leaving my throbbing elbow in peace. A blow that like wouldn't have hurt a normal, healthy human and Edward must have known that, which is why he began the twenty questions. Before he could continue the interrogation and I no doubt revealed something I didn't want to I frowned and looked pointedly at my bag on his back. He didn't comment on my gaze; and I also noticed he wasn't heading towards his first lesson, which I didn't know. He was heading towards English.  
"Edward...you don't have English first." I was confused. He kept walking at the same stride but he turned to look at me, still smirking in a truly amazing way. He'd have every girl swooning over him everywhere he went if he unleashed that smile on them. Already I felt like jelly.  
"It's your first lesson isn't it?"  
"Well...yes, but it isn't your first lesson."  
"I'm walking a beautiful lady to her destination, it's polite and the most gentleman thing to do."  
"From the twentieth century." I said lightly; still frowning at him; "Woman earned the right to carry their own bags years ago." He just smiled at me and kept walking and I sighed in frustration. I hated letting someone else make a fuss over me when it wasn't necessary. I hated it when it was necessary.

Eventually we reached the doors to English and he stopped, leaning against the doorframe with his trademark rugged, crooked smile which made my heart wince in wanting. He'd kissed me on the cheek, he'd caressed his fingers over my cheek, and he'd loved my gift. What did that mean for a potential relationship? Would he let me kiss him? Would I be able to justify it as a goodbye/parting thing?  
"I'll see you at lunch Bella. Or in Biology." Even as he virtually dismissed himself he didn't leave. Something seemed to be bothering him. His usual confident air had collapsed and faded; and I was finding I liked this new open, emotional Edward as well as the other one. He was easier to relate to.

"I really loved the dream catcher."

"You don't think it was too corny?" I asked, my frown increasing. That's one of the things that had been bothering me. I'd known him a couple of days and I was handing him a gift?  
"I think it was beautiful, just like you. I will treasure it with my life. I'll see you at lunch beautiful Bella." Before I could comment on his words which almost made me melt in ecstasy he turned on his heel and waltzed away to his next lesson.

I kicked myself for not kissing that angel before he went back where he belonged.

Away from me.

A/N: Ok, we all know I don't own Twilight so we're going to stick with that theme. I enjoyed writing this chapter; especially the Edward and Bella close moment near the end. There'll be plenty more of those coming your way guys so keep tuned in. This story is really starting off in my mind so you should be getting more regular updates. It depends on how much free time I have to write and beta the chapters. I hope everything's going good for all my reviewers and best wishes to you all. Read and review. Thank you for continuing your support in this fan fiction.


	7. Chapter 7

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Seven _

Behind One or Two Closed Doors

English passed in a complete blur; the only thoughts which rotated in my mind concerned the words Edward had spoken to me before I'd let the angel get away. I was really kicking myself over that one. All it would have took to kiss him once on the lips would have been an accidental leaning forward on my part and wow. I've have had my first proper kiss with a God.

"Bella." Jessica was leaning over the back of her seat, her eager eyes planted squarely on my lovesick expression; which I was probably broadcasting to the whole class right about now.

"Yes?" With a visible effort I tried to concentrate on something that wasn't Edward. It wasn't easy. The bronze-tint –when caught by the light- in Jessica's hair reminded me of Edward's luxurious locks. I was suddenly envisioning myself running my fingers through the silky strands to give his hair a tousled look I absolutely adored.

Oh, I really was doomed to be spending the last week or so of my life completely head over heels for Edward Cullen. Yet...that didn't seem like a bad thing. Edward was a break from reality for me...a dream with no responsibilities in it; an end without the harsh consequences of leaving those I loved.

"Bella? Did you hear what I just said?"

"No." I hadn't meant to sound so blunt but Jessica was becoming annoying. I was happy submerged in my idealistic thoughts of Edward and here she was dragging me from them because she wanted _gossip_? For a brief moment I considered telling her everything...about Edward keeping my dream catcher; about him loving it. The kiss on the cheek.

Of course; I'd never really consider telling her anything. It'd be round the school like wild fire; which in turn would probably scare Edward away full stop. How could I even let that become a possibility when he already meant so much to me?

"Well...I said..." Jess made a point of huffing her breath out like it was causing her distress to repeat something. I bet she was actually enjoying collecting gossip to pass onto Lauren and whoever she hung out with. Ever since the accident with Angela; I'd determined that staying away from the other students was an appealing option. Angela and Ben were the only pupils in this school who didn't seem...false, hidden under pretence from me. I hated it when people tried to be something they weren't, which was hypocrital coming from a girl who was fooling everyone into thinking she was alive when she was technically dead.

"You've been here four days. You missed yesterday and half the day before and yet you still bag Edward Cullen. How did you do it?" I heard unprecedented awe and the tingling of jealousy in her tone as I searched desperately for a way to evade the subject having made my decision to keep what had happened between Edward and me secret.

"I haven't bagged Edward Cullen Jess. He's just...a friend." Referring to Edward Cullen as a _friend _obviously wasn't a concept Jessica could comprehend because she continued staring expectantly at me like I hadn't even answered her question (though technically I hadn't.)

Even though I knew it couldn't be possible, it felt like every other student in English was listening in on this talk, wanting their questions answered as well. Curiosity really did kill the cat. How was I going to avoid the subject when Jessica was this determined to get answers?

"Well?" She demanded, interrupting my mental panic; "How did you land Edward Cullen?" Was it me or did she say that slightly louder than necessary? Was that just my nervous mind tuning up the volume so that my paranoia was sure everyone else had heard it? Even as I thought this; I noticed several heads swivel round to glance at us before returning back swiftly when they noticed me looking.

"I don't know...I just keep running into him. It seems to be fate or something."

"So you're saying it's your fate to date Edward Cullen?" Jessica sounded sceptical of that idea; like I'd just told her I was pregnant with her brother's love child or something. The teacher was lecturing up front but he seemed completely clueless when it came to overhearing our conversation. Shame; I desperately needed a way out of explaining this before it went drastically wrong and I messed everything up with the Cullens and Edward.

Edward especially. And Alice. Those were the only two Cullens I'd actually met properly. I'd had a run in with Emmett on my first day but it hadn't been anything particularly drastic.

"Well...I enjoy talking to him; and I hope he enjoys talking to me. It's just like...we relax in each other's company...like a natural attraction or something." Had I just said that out loud? I was only supposed to be _thinking _it! Now Jess was going to spread round the rumour that I was practically saying Edward and I were dating. How did I reverse the damage I'd just done without making it look suspicious in Jess's eyes?

Just as expected though; she jumped at what I said like a dog for a bone.

"So you're saying you're like...dating?"  
"No, not exactly. We're just friends."  
"But you enjoy each other's company?" The sceptical look was back; and the disbelieving one. With casual innocence she leant forward and put on the face a teacher would have when they were teaching a toddler to read one of the simplest books around with only a word on every page.

"Bella honey...here in Forks...I don't know whether you have it in Phoenix, there's something called "denial." From what you've told me, you and Edward are practically dating."

"But we're not." I protested; digging myself into a deeper hole as she raised a single, plucked eyebrow in my direction with questions in her sparkling brown eyes.  
"Really?"  
"Yes."  
"Then why do you keep denying it? And why are you so quick to deny it? That's normally the sign of a guilty conscience." Once again; I was almost burying myself with my own shovel as I sat there awkwardly in my seat; waiting for the teacher to notice a conversation that clearly wasn't on her lesson. Why in the world hadn't she noticed that Jessica had turned away from her completely to torture me with twenty questions?

As I waited for Jessica to run low on questions...I still hadn't answered her one about being quick to deny my relationship with Edward and she was getting impatient.

"Bella!" Ok; even Jess had limits; and she was refusing to beg. Instead she was just settling for whining at me until she wore me down; and she was close to doing that. Honestly...if I had to think in detail about any more of my answers before I replied to Jess I really was going to be sick to my head.  
"Please! I need answers. Are you and Edward Cullen dating? How did it happen? What stage are you at? Has he kissed you yet? What was it like? Is he as much a God when you're kissing him as he is when you see him walk down the hallways or when he's eating in the canteen? Come on Bella! I need answers!"

"Well, Miss Stanley. I have answers but can you tell me what in particular is bothering you?" Mr Mason asked, crossing his arms across his chest and he glared –like a hawk (now instead of before? Really? Was he serious?) At Jessica; who'd gone a beetroot red. I doubted she wanted to repeat her gushing for older, more experienced ears.

"I was just...wondering why...Romeo had to take the poison in the first place? Surely there's plenty more fish in the ocean?"  
"That's an interesting point of view Miss Stanley." Jessica actually looked relieved that she'd managed to comment on a book we weren't actually studying in this lesson. We'd moved on from Romeo and Juliet. Now it was Wuthering Heights. Of course, Jessica didn't know this and she was under the impression that she was on a roll so she became the person who dug themselves into a deep hole.

"I don't get why Juliet had to kill herself either. They were both stupid, lovesick teenagers! So they had sex! There are plenty of people who'd be willing to sleep with her! Why was Romeo so special?" The bluntness in her statement made me blink several times and I wasn't the only one. The rest of the class had fallen silent and were barely restraining themselves from giggling at Jessica's mistake. Even Mr Mason was barely stopping himself from letting out a chuckle.

"You can talk to me about Romeo and Juliet during lunch Jessica. Right now we're talking about the relationship of _Mr Darcy _with the other characters. Please keep your topic straight in the future."

Jessica didn't say another word all lesson and I basked in the beautiful silence.

How long was it really going to last with Lauren Mallory and Jessica Stanley in the same school as me though? They were just the females. What about Mike Newton and Eric Yorkie? I was going crazy from all this unneeded attention. Couldn't they find something else to focus their attention on?

Edward was the only I wanted to concentrate on me.

Lunch came slower than I would have liked. Apparently Mike had heard more than I first thought and now he thought he somehow had the right to demand every detail from mine and Edward's relationship. Honestly; he was acting like my father!

The bustling and hustling of the cafeteria were welcoming sounds to my ears. After spending three lessons trying to change and alter my answers while keeping to the same guidelines I'd given Jess I was thoroughly exhausted with keeping up a pretence. Part of me wandered what would happen if I did spread the rumour that Edward and I were dating.

What would he say? What would he do? How mad would he be at me? It wasn't worth the risk. Edward already meant too much to me. I couldn't bear the concept of losing him because I made a stupid mistake and spread a futile rumour which could never be true no matter how much I wished it.

"So Bella..." Mike was standing by my side like a golden Labrador retriever with a lunch tray which was already full in his hands as I lined up with a water bottle in my hands. My stomach was doing back flips as I contemplated having to spend a whole _hour_ fending off Jessica's and Mike's questions combined. Maybe I should just head home because I was "ill."

No, I couldn't do that. Charlie would find out and he'd immediately assume it was because my leukaemia was starting to get the better of me. He'd be scared that he was losing me sooner than he was ready for. How could I force that upon him?

That's why I took in a breath and told myself to buck up and face it like a grown up. I only had a week or two left; I could handle deterring gossip. Honestly, dying didn't scare me all that much but facing the king and queen of spreading rumours did? How twisted was that?

"You have Biology after lunch. Next to Cullen." If I was giving out awards for stating the obvious Mike would win the gold. And maybe the silver and bronze as well.

"I guess I do."

"That's two dollars love." The lunch lady who worked the cashier extended a wrinkled but warm looking hand for the bills I had rolled in my hand and I quickly handed it over; eager to escape from more of Mike's "state the obvious" while he paid for his extremely big lunch from loose change in his pocket.

"Bella!" Jessica was calling me over already and I was mentally screaming. I could escape right now, run out the cafeteria doors and pretend I had somewhere to be. That'd be the easy option but I wasn't ready to explain. Where was my knight on a white steed when I needed him?

"Hello Bella." Ask and you shall receive. Feeling like liquid inside and out I spun round on my heel; and like an idiot lost my balance, almost collapsing on top of the unsuspecting teenage God who'd taken time out of his unearthly schedule to come and visit me. Amazing really.

"Edward, hi." Already I could feel the blood in my cheeks budding up absolutely. Damn it! Why did I always embarrass myself when I wanted nothing more than to impress someone for once in my life? Did someone up there hate me that much? I guess I'd find out soon.

"Would you like to eat lunch with me and my family? I noticed that you seemed oddly hesitant to go over to your usual table...and I really do owe you a thanks in return for your gift."  
"It was nothing really." That blush just wouldn't go away! Why did Edward have to be so damn sexy, cute and thoughtful all rolled into one?

"Nothing? It was amazing. Unique. Original. Hand-crafted."

"I didn't make it though Edward. It was something I brought from Phoenix...I just thought it was suited to you." Because you're as perfect as the dream catcher and I wish you would gift yourself to _me_! I mentally shouted in frustration as I tried to stop my mind from coming up with countless possibilities. I could be "clumsy" Bella; being myself I could fall over my feet and land near his lips so I could brush past them. I could reach into my pocket for change and drop it all. Edward being as kind and caring as he was would bend down to help me and we'd look into each other's eyes and we wouldn't be able to stop ourselves.

Sadly all they'd ever be were delusions. And the sooner I accepted that the better it was for everyone. Well...me and Edward but...oh, it doesn't matter.

"Your instincts were right. It suits me perfectly; you must be really perceptive." Edward's eyes were so condemning and serious at the same time...like he was sharing his soul with me. Yet at the same time there was joy and teasing in them as well. There were so many sides to Edward I didn't know; and yet I wanted nothing more than to learn and love each one.

Hold on. Hold up right there. Love?

I thought I'd just wanted a date with him. So I didn't die as someone who'd never dated a boy. Never kissed a boy. When did loving someone come into it? Should I turn down his offer before I could in too deep? Before I got the chance to hurt him beyond compare? There were so many things I didn't know, so many things I could do wrong while I was still alive. Dying might not even be a problem if things went wrong before then.

"Thanks, I think."  
"So, would you like to eat with me and my family?"  
"I'd..." I'd been about to say "I'd love to" with as much enthusiasm as you can possible imagine. This was Edward and the mysterious yet perfect Cullens we were talking about here! I managed to stop myself before I made a complete idiot of myself though; "I'd like that. Jess and Mike won't be able to quiz me all lunch. I already have a headache." To reinforce my point I rubbed my head tenderly and frowned when I encountered a proper headache. Here I was thinking it'd disappeared when Edward had come over. Maybe it'd just been forced down in his presence.

"Would you like something to eat first? I don't think water makes up a healthy lunch." I noticed the way his eyes moved down to the water bottle clutched in my hand like a lifeline or the disapproving glint in them. Once again; I wasn't about ready to explain that because of my leukaemia I didn't eat all that much.  
"I'm not hungry at the moment, and I'm planning on doing a big dinner for Charlie. I want to leave room for that." Edward didn't seem satisfied with my response but he let it go.

The silence in the room was making me extremely self-conscious; and I swear I heard several audible gasps when Edward took a light grip on my hand and gently tugged me towards his beckoning siblings (except Rosalie.)  
"Alice...you've already met Bella, but Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie..." I didn't miss the stiff stare Edward shot at his adopted sister before turning back to his smiling siblings; "This is Isabella Swan. But she prefers Bella." Jasper said a short but sweet hello with a casual distance edging into his tone. He wasn't particularly unfriendly but I didn't think I'd become best friends with him any time soon. Not like I had with his girlfriend. He might have been a bit angry with me also for crashing my truck and almost murdering her. Surely that would make any boyfriend angry?

Emmett smirked as I slipped into the seat Edward had yanked out of its place in the table for me. As soon as I'd gotten comfortable on the cushion he scooted it back in and took a seat beside me; fiddling with the bottle cap from my suddenly open water. Had that been him? Had he opened it when I wasn't looking? There were a lot of things that didn't add up with the Cullens. The accidents...the fact they didn't eat...their cold skin...their eyes –so breath-takingly inhuman.

"So Bella...what do you think of Forks so far?" Emmett leant forward intently; like my answer was the only thing he cared about. His posture suggested that he was teasing me in some way; but I couldn't figure out how his question could –in any way- be rhetorical. Surely asking how I was doing at school wasn't sarcastic, it was pleasant? Curious?

"It's...unusual."  
"Unusual how?"  
"I seem to attract car accidents for starters. That never happened in Phoenix." Edward stiffened when I mentioned almost getting squished by both Tyler's van and my truck. Jasper and Alice seemed to be distracted by something interesting on the other side of the cafeteria while Rosalie just sat glumly with her arms crossed across her chest; seemingly unhappy that I'd invaded her table. Emmett was the only one who had a direct reaction; which was to laugh like there was no tomorrow and like I hadn't almost been killed by two out of control vehicles. He was coming across as a joker already. It was safe to say that I also liked him a lot already. He seemed like one of those "do what I want without thinking before I act" people and I needed a friend like that to balance things out.

"So...you genuinely like Forks...minus the murdering vehicles?"

"It's...very green." I said lightly; trying to figure out a way to explain just what I felt about Forks. I wanted to make it my home before I passed away; I truly did, but I missed the sun and hot deserts from Phoenix. I missed sitting outside at night in nothing more than shorts and shirt with a gentle breeze tugging at the tips of my hair. I wanted to experience that one more time...but it didn't seem like I ever would.  
"Green?"

"Phoenix was very hot; sandy. Sunny."

"So you like the sun?" Emmett glanced at Edward for a split second before turning back to me; bombarding more questions my way. Somehow I didn't mind the questions why they came from Emmett; they were easy to answer, and I didn't even stop to consider the prospect of lying. The Cullens wouldn't gossip; they didn't run the school's grapevine. Whatever I said was safe with them.

"Yeah; I think it's a lot more pleasant than the rain and constant clouds."  
"We've lost in the sun…it's not all it's cracked up to be." There was something hidden from me underneath Emmett's commnet but I couldn't piece together the meaning to what he was saying.

"You…travel a lot?" I didn't mean to sound so sceptical of the idea. I think some of the inevitable sadness from dying –losing any oppurtunities I could possibly have wanted- was catching up with me as others explained experiences they'd already had and ones they could carry on having in the future while I was cold and lying in a buried grave; rotting away into the earth while maggots chomping on my stiff flesh.

That was a plesant mental image. Not.

"We've been almost everywhere…Carlisle and Esme like to hike. It's a hobby. So…how long do you plan on being in Forks?" The sudden change in subject made me edgy and suspicious –did they know about my leukaemia? About me dying in a week or so?- but I took in a wobbly, shaky breath and looked Emmett square in the eyes when I answered.  
"Until I feel like leaving I guess." Emmett didn't even look at me when I answered; his eyes spun round to Edward while a frown was plastered on the bronze-haired angel's features.  
"You're right Edward; she's a bad liar. I can tell from over here and _I'm _not exactly the most perceptive person on this table." My mouth must have been dragging on the floor in shock because Alice took pity on me and explained.

"Emmett thinks you're only passing through."  
"Why would he think that?" I didn't think I missed the "shut up" look which Edward shot at his adopted sister; nor did I miss the way Emmett seemed to be gradually sinking into his chair. Maybe lunch with the Cullens hadn't been such a good idea after all…Jess's and Mike's questions seemed worth it rather than dealing with this.

The Cullens seemed to know everything about me already.

"It's…a hunch."  
"Well…" I was faced with an important decision right now. I could admit the truth and take the penalty; which would probably be endless questions; or I could attempt to lie again (I knew I'd fail at that already.)

Which was a safer option?

"It's right. I'm here another week tops. I'm leaving the end of next week."  
"Really?" Edward's head shot up when I admitted that through my teeth; and his eyes connected with mine. Inside them I could see a deep-rooted sadness and a vivid regret at the prospect of me leaving so soon. The very presence of his gaze made me heat up several notces as my heart skipped rapidly about; uncontrollable as the teenage God I'd had the pleasure of spending time with scooted his seat closer to mine.

Emmett shot Edward a meaningful glance while Alice was smiling knowingly; her eyes sharp on Edward's. Jasper and Rosalie didn't seem to have any reactions; Jasper was smiling slightly though (if it could be called a smile.)

"You're leaving?"  
"Are you going back to Phoenix?"  
"That's no fun! Can't you ask to stay longer?" Emmett, Alice and Edward commented all at the same time. My head was almost ready to explode from the pressure coming from all sides. Why had I told them I was leaving next week? What if someone else had heard? What if the Cullens pieced it together when I didn't return back to Phoenix?

These worries seemed useless though. It wouldn't matter once I'd actually died what the Cullens would do. They couldn't stop my leukaemia from consuming my body and ending my life. That was the end of that. No argument. Story finished.  
"Yes I'm leaving." I said in reply to Edward's question; "No, I'm not going back to Phoenix and Emmett…I can't stay any longer. My ticket's…non-refundable." He had no idea how true that was. Dying wasn't something I could alter so it suited _me_. I had to make it so it suited dying.

Silence began to overtake the table again; and I awkwardly took a glug of my water; wondering why I'd agreed to come over here to face the endless torrent of questions.

"So Bella…where…where are you planning on going?" Into the ground in a coven.

"Somewhere I've never been before."  
"But…where?" I won't know until I get there I suppose. No one gets back from heaven exactly do they?  
"Somewhere…sunny. Warm. I don't know what it's called."

"You're moving to somewhere you don't know the name of?" I knew the name of where I was going to go. It would be either heaven or hell…but if I said that he'd piece together too much, and so would his family. On the other hand; all these questions…it was like they already knew. Maybe Carlisle –the doctor from the plane and the Cullens adopted father- had told them my name without meaning any harm and they'd put two and two together.  
"My mum does. I can't…pronounce it." I knew from what Emmett had said earlier that lying wouldn't work. They'd see right through me, so I was trying to stay as close to the truth as possible. Before Edward could shoot any more questions at me about my location next week after I "left" I decided it was time for a swift change of subject.

"Where have you lived then? You obviously don't spend a lot of time in the sun…you're so pale." It was a double meaning in a sentence; and I was pretty proud of myself. I'd noticed the moment I arrived that the Cullens were deadly pale –like corpses- but it was a complete mystery to me. Why were they that pale? Did they have a disease? Had Carlisle given them a chemical injected into their blood stream or something? Was it natural?

I did want to know about their past though. I was curious as to that factor.

"We've been…almost everywhere. Too many places to name I suppose." Edward seemed upset that I'd switched the subject but I pried on without hesitation; making sure that the conversation never got a chance to return to me and my abrupt departure.  
"So…have you been to Egypt?"  
"Yeah; now _that _brings back some memories." Emmett took over the conversation and started describing –in detail- the time they'd locked Edward in one of the tombs in the pyramids because he'd refused to go climbing up them with his brothers.

The rest of lunch passed in a blur. Edward didn't say another word.

Edward led me into the empty Biology classroom ten minutes early after "escaping" from his siblings; who in turn had been asking me endless questions about my escapades in Phoenix once Emmett had worn himself out repeating every memory they'd had in the last two years. I now knew a lot more about the Cullen family that I bet no one would know in their whole lifetime.  
"I'm sorry about Emmett Bella. Sometimes he acts like a child."  
"I think he's funny. But sweet at the same time."

"Funny I'll give you but sweet? You obviously weren't seeing the same Emmett that I'm forced to live with."

"Maybe he was on his best behaviour." A smile crept onto my features as he pulled my seat free and gestured to it with open arms; inviting and welcoming ones.

"Thank you." That blasted blush was back to embarrass me further. Why could I just face Edward without turning tomato red? Was that too much to ask for?  
"So…you never answered my questions. Why are you leaving?"  
"I…I don't really get a choice."  
"Does your mother want you to come and live with her?"

"It's not that." I knew I was landing myself further and further in trouble but I couldn't bring myself to lie to Edward.  
"Then…what is it?"  
"Nothing in-particular. I just have to go. Have you got notes on yesterday's lesson?" Edward hesitated for a moment; obviously unsure of how to proceed his questioning when I was obviously trying to avoid the subject.  
"Yes, I do." He finally sighed as he removed his folder of elegantly done notes and removed the right page. With disbelieving eyes I read the two pages he'd noted on and glanced uneasily at my own scribbly writing from my past work.

There was nothing alike when it came to Edward and I. He was perfect, primped and just…everything I'd never be. Everything I'd never get a chance to be.

"Would you like a hand?" Edward was smiling at the distracted posture I'd put myself in and with reddened cheeks I nodded my agreement. The movement was so sudden that at first I couldn't believe he'd actually done it. With an unexpected smoothness in his motions he reached out steadily with his hands and took a grip on my pen; smiling crookedly as my fingers closed on it instinctively. Why did he want my pen?  
"Bella. You can't have that bone without connecting it here first…" Edward started to sketch a hasty yet perfect diagram with a sketching technique as unique as him; his cold but sensational hand against mine as he scribbled. Once he'd finished he began labelling it without so much as glancing at his notes.

"Edward...I..." Before I could open my mouth to say "thank you for helping me" the weirdest but greatest thing happened to me. Against all odds he released his grip on the pen all of a sudden and turned to gaze at me with certain eyes.

The next thing I knew his lips were on mine; his arms wrapping around me protectively.

The kiss was everything I'd imagined. Bolts of electricity rushed through my system and set everything going crazy. Edward's skin seemed to be conducting the energy I felt flowing between us so extremely. Great rushes of blood shot through my veins at double their normal pace; my heart must have quadrupled its pace.

His lips tasted of everything I could think of. All the things I loved. The hot summer night's on the porch with the breeze brushing through my hair; the dream catcher I'd given him, all the private moments we'd had together since I'd first met him those three days ago.

There was something I didn't know about Edward...whatever made him perfect yet pale, strong and...just timeless. A part of me was yearning to know every mystery that surrounded him. Edward was a perfect character in a story I loved. He was my knight in shining armour as I'd thought earlier. Before when I'd mentioned falling in love...I wasn't sure what it felt like but if it wasn't this, they could take love back and exchange it because I was keeping _this_ until I was forced to return it.

Eagerly; I leant forward into Edward's grip; wanting to taste and feel more of him than was available to me at the moment; than was being presented to me. For a single second he seemed to kiss back with a ferocity so strong I was almost knocked off my feet, but just as quickly as it'd begun –just as spontaneously- he'd pulled back with something like regret mixed into his expression.

All of a sudden my heart fell deep into hiding. I'd put myself on auto-pilot as I tried to ignore what I knew was coming. That look...those eyes; so filled with sadness and regret already. He hadn't wanted to do that, he'd just got caught up in the moment. How could it ever begin to mean as much to him as it did to me? A whole universe separated us from each other...an extremely large universe with barriers blocking us from each other.

"I...Bella, I don't..." Edward seemed lost for words; and because I couldn't stop myself I licked my lips for a second, trying to get the remnants of Edward into my mouth so I could taste his delicious aroma again; so I could imagine myself kissing him just...once...more.

That was obviously some kind of turn on because Edward came forward again and our lips locked more forcefully this time. Whatever will I'd had; whatever part of me had been demanding sanity; reminding me that I couldn't get too close to anyone because I'd be leaving them soon, had been shunted away completely and locked up in the deepest, darkest corner I could find to gather dust. To be forgotten. How could I even consider leaving Edward –leaving _this_- when it was all I'd have to take with me wherever I was going? How could I stop when I wanted this more than anything?

I knew it made me selfish; and I'd beat myself up for it later but Edward and I seemed connected; like our souls were connected and moulded together as one. The way he kissed me; it was soft and gentle, sweet and tender. Not a single moment hurt my aching, decaying body when even daily chores usually taxed me and made everything seem like I'd got bruises I kept catching. His lips were soft and moist, smooth and like velvet against mine as he brought up one straying hand to roam through my tangled brown hair. Caressing tugs felt from the roots of my hair but I didn't mind; it was relaxing and peaceful. Familiar yet different at the same time. Everything Edward did...even the way he moved his lips slightly as he kissed to get a better, more effective, longer-lasting taste made me twinge in delight. Kissing an angel was definitely one of those "once in a lifetime" things that everyone should want to do.

Things were just made more amazing; everything seemed to get hitched into brighter colour, more effective sound. Harmonising words and songs which gathered round your ears and overwhelmed and intoxicated your senses.

I have no idea how long we remained glued together –like two people sharing one body- but I knew it was the best time of my life so far; and I knew it'd beat anything that was waiting for me after I died. That much I was sure about.

What broke us apart eventually was someone clearing their throat impatiently; seemingly ticked off with something.

"Bella...did you need to copy the notes?" Mike's voice was angry –even though he was directing his glare at Edward when he spoke in his clipped tone- and Jessica was huddled behind him; her eyes wide as she sensed something she could pass on indefinitely through the gossip grapevine. The thought of everyone believing I was Edward Cullen's girlfriend made me go dizzy with amazement and pride. If he would seriously considering dating someone like _me_ than there was hope for anyone out there.

"There's no need. She's copying mine." Edward said lightly but in a frustrated tone as he returned Mike's glare tenfold.

"You looked like you were distracting her."

"I was giving her a physical demonstration of the human emotions and how they react in certain circumstances." Jessica scoffed behind him and muttered something that sounded like;

"If that's what you call it." Before Mike opened his mouth to cheep back some cheap retort which neither Edward, nor I would appreciate.

"Thanks for the offer Mike but I'm ok with Edward's notes." The silence continued for a whole second before Mike let out a sigh of agonising fury and shifted to the back of the classroom to take his assigned seat while Jessica yanked a seat over to him and began talking non-stop at a whisper volume.

With Mike burning his eyes into the back of my head –making me feel violated and stalked- I wasn't willing to begin another tantalizing, captivating kiss with the tempting guy next to me; so instead I picked up my pen once more, sighed quite loudly to make a point to Mike that he'd ruined my fun and scooted over closer to Edward.

"So...where were we note-wise? I think we were talking about this bone..."

Having Mike watching our every move like a police officer in an official interview with an accused party got beyond annoying. Several times he found an excuse to move to our table temporarily when he thought we were getting a little too close. I knew he'd shown me around when I first arrived here; and I was thankful for that but I might have to point out to him pretty soon that he wasn't the owner of me, and Edward was the person I'd chosen to spend my free time with.

Gym passed uneventfully. I got hit with the badminton racket once on my forearm but I managed to mask the pain which would no doubt be budding up on my expression.

It took me the whole of gym to remember one thing however. The way I'd gotten to school. Edward's silver Volvo was parked outside –with my gift dream catcher hanging from the mirror- and I had another journey to make with Edward. Alone. Our kiss in Biology seemed like the freshest memory on my mind; the taste and texture of his lips, the way his hands had strayed over my body. It'd felt marvellous. He'd touched parts of me –inside and out- that I'd never had touched before.

"Gym's dismissed. Everyone go and get changed. Tomorrow's a theory lesson so you don't need your kits." The Coach said lightly; already heading towards the exit of the gym with an expression that said "I need a beer and a hand massage."

Jessica and Lauren descended on me like vampire hunters to their prey.

"Jessica said Edward Cullen was kissing you at the beginning of Biology. She was saying that he'd basically needed a crowbar to tear you apart." Jessica nodded, proving her statement true and I took in a gulping breath before shrugging my shoulders like it wasn't a big deal. The daggers Lauren was shooting me said it was more than a big deal; and that she wasn't very happy a newbie had managed to snatch away one of the few elegant bachelors in the school. Here I was thinking she wanted Tyler to herself; when in fact she was after Edward Cullen.

"Yeah...it was...unexpected to say the least." My own voice sounded weak and vulnerable; and from the expression on Lauren's face she was planning on using that against me.

The changing room door hung open with hushed conversations continuing inside. Originally, Jess and Lauren had changed on the other side of the room amongst a group of their followers but when it became obvious that they wanted more answers; their belongings miraculously moved appeared beside mine.

My shirt came off and I replaced it with the one I'd picked out so carefully this morning. Just as I zipping and buttoning up my jeans –attempting to hide the bruises on my legs from several accidents- I noticed something bizarre when my forearms came into view. There were violent black and blue bruises sprouting up in the shapes of fingerprints. It took my brain over a full minute to reach a conclusion, and even then I had aid from Lauren (Jessica seemed to be there as support or something.)

"Was he a bit rough Bella?" Her voice had gone snooty and all-knowing.

"Maybe you need to leave him to someone else. We wouldn't want you to get _hurt _now would we?" Spitting out the truth –that I bruised easily because of my leukaemia- would have been a rather a stupid idea but boy, was it such a tempting possibility in that moment. To see the smug expressions on both of their faces sink when they realised what it meant...I bit my tongue and stopped the on flow from flowing from my lips with a great, visible effort.

"Oh my God! I'm right aren't I? I always knew from looking at him that there was a reason he hadn't got a girlfriend. It's because he can't keep his strength down to a minimum. He'd basically squish someone like you." Truthfully I'd noticed that Edward was stronger than he appeared to be but there was no way I was letting Lauren get away with basically calling Edward a bullying, abusing boyfriend (not that he was my official boyfriend or anything.)  
"I'm going to make one thing clear to you Lauren." I was slipping on my shoes as I said this; which meant I was avoiding her eyes. That wasn't a brave "what you said wasn't true" move so I finished tying them up before I continued my bashing.

"Edward is not -I repeat not- abusing me; and if all you can do with your time is spread nasty, filthy rumours than you need to get a life. Have you ever tried community service? I hear it's great for pent up anger." Jessica was trying to stifle a giggle while Lauren balanced a finger in my direction with an unpredicted fury.

"I think you're the one who needs help Swan. If you think...for a second that you'll be enough for him –that he won't drop you like that-" She clicked her fingers for example; "Then I think you have a screw loose somewhere up here. But then, we already knew that so it's not news to us. That's why you're here right? You chased some hottie in Phoenix –become a stalker- and your mum and step dad were so ashamed of you that they dumped you here." My fist was curling in on itself instinctively; wanting to connect with that hideous smile which had melted onto Lauren's expression when she realised she'd got me with a comment I had no response for.

"See...I got it in one right?" She hadn't guessed the truth.

I was here to say goodbye to my father before I passed away.

Part of me wondered whether she'd regret what she'd said when I was dead and gone. Would Lauren even care?  
"You know what Lauren? Believe what you want. I know the truth and the people I care about know the truth. What a snob thinks doesn't really bother me." As I said it I realised that it was true. I didn't care what she and the other people in this changing room thought. Angela had really been the only person I'd been friends with concerning females; and she was still in hospital recovering from her concussion or something along those lines.

Before Lauren got the chance to shoot some sarcastic comment back that would no doubt leave me speechless I grabbed my school bag and kit and headed towards the changing room exit. As I continued through them all the way outside I was stupid enough not to look where I was going and who was in front of me.

Edward Cullen being the one in front of me.

My balance –as usual- was thrown when I made unexpected contact with him –his skin sent shocks of electricity down mine as well which set me off being uneven on a flat surface and all- but his cool hand latched onto mine and straightened me up; preventing another bruise from spontaneously appearing.

"Thank you." I said genuinely with a smile. What'd happened in the changing room...that was nothing. What those girls thought wasn't true so why should it bother me in the slightest?

"Would like to help making some more notes from the classes you missed yesterday?" Edward's question was completely leaving me the choice; but I had no idea how I could possibly want anything else. Edward –the teenage God- lounging around in my house for potentially hours helping me with making notes? Last time we'd "made notes" he'd ended up kissing me before we were interrupted. Who wouldn't want more of that?

Something else seemed to be bothering Edward as well though. His eyes were connected with the ground like something particularly interesting had caught his attention.

"Is everything all right Edward?" His head shot up and I got my first glance into those swirling pools of trustworthy gold I loved so much.

"I don't want you to leave Bella. Not next week, not next year, not ever. I think I'm in love with you."

A/N: That was potentially worse than leaving it on a dire death scene right? I couldn't resist; plus I had to give you something special mean as I won't be updating for the next two weeks before I have mocks to study for. I hope you're all enjoying this story; and to those who think this might be going a little fast, I can't help it. Bella and Edward are meant to be together; I have to write them together pretty darn soon! I don't own Twilight nor the lovely characters but I love writing them in new scenes which other people with enjoy. Please review.


	8. Chapter 8

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Eight _

Sing the Chorus

One moment we'd been talking about copying up Biology notes; and then Edward was dropping _this _massive bombshell on me. His words didn't seem real, there was no way he'd fallen for me. No possible way. Faster than I could comprehend, scenarios were running through my head, speeding through my stressed brain at the speed of sound. Edward said he was in love with me –or he thought he was. I was going to be dying soon –next week!- and he'd said he couldn't lose me at the beginning of that sentence as well! How could he possibly have fallen for me? Compared to him I was nothing more than a mere mortal.

"I don't know how it happened or why it happened Bella." I was shocked by Edward's confession but apparently so was he. His tone sounded unsure; wavering. Who would be able to resist him when he exclaimed things like that in the middle of the parking lot? My heart was already drawn to him; he was already my everything. I knew I'd fallen in love with him from the first moment I'd looked into his eyes and seen the determination; the kindness, the other-worldliness.

"But I'm sure of one thing; and that's that I'd have it no other way. Every time I...wake up in the morning," He hesitated when he said the second part of his statement, like there was something wrong with that fact but he carried on when I fixed him with my confused stare, which meant I didn't blink once; "You're the first person I think about. When I come home, when I'm reading, doing work, hanging out with my brothers and sisters...the only thing that's ever on my mind is you Bella. When you manage to find danger in the safest of situations...it scares me. It scares me _a lot _because I'm terrified of losing you. I don't want anything to take you away from me. Whether it's intentional or by accident." As he'd been speaking, Edward had inched closer, and his captivating body was just centimetres away from mine when he finally finished his confession.

The honest-to-God words that I was preparing to say got stuck in my throat. They refused to emerge. I wanted to tell Edward he was everything to me as well, that I'd never do anything to hurt him that I'd never leave him. For a moment –a single moment- I allowed myself to forget that I had a date with death. It didn't matter that I was going to die, that I didn't get a choice in the matter. Edward made me feel safe; he made me feel wanted and loved. We had this intense connection –both physical and emotional- that I wasn't willing to threaten in any shape or form.

So why couldn't I tell him my feelings? Was my conscience stopping me from breaking his heart? Was it stopping me from promising him something I could never give him? Was it so wrong of me to want happiness? Peace of mind before I died? Was it so wrong to want it from Edward?

"Edward...I;" What could I say?

A feeling in the pit of my stomach –a part of me I didn't want to ever take control- was ordering me; urging me to tell Edward the truth. Before it was too late. We'd only known each other a few days. He could move on, fall for someone else. He couldn't possibly have fallen so hard and fast for me in such a short period of time. There was still a chance to save his heart from being crushed.

"Edward, we can't be together. It's not...I have to leave. I have to go, and I don't want to hurt your feelings by leaving you behind."  
"Bella..." Edward sounded saddened by this fact but not at all surprised. It was like he'd had the foresight already to realise that I wouldn't react lovingly when he made his confession.  
"No Edward, wait. I haven't finished." The problem had been before, not knowing what to say. Now I didn't know what _not _to say. Did I tell him about my leukaemia? About dying and never coming back? What would he say? Or did I attempt to lie badly and cover my sick butt?

I knew which my heart wanted to do. It didn't want to hurt Edward with the truth; he'd claimed to love me. Knowing I was going to die...it wouldn't be immensely pleasant for him. How could I condone that? How I could force that knowledge on him?

Suddenly leaving –not to die but just to leave- sounded like one of the best ideas I'd ever had. I could just disappear to die. Edward would never know I was leaving; he wouldn't be able to follow me. He'd move on and carry on living.

"You can't love me Edward. I can't return that love. I just can't. Next week I'm leaving –I don't have a choice- and I can't bear the thought of leaving you more hurt when I have to leave you high and dry. I'm never going to come back Edward. Never. You'll never see me again. Never." Not unless being presented in a coffin at a funeral counted. Charlie would probably send him an invite.

Edward seemed broken; like he'd collapsed in tatters inside himself and his body was the only thing supporting him. Chattering sounded behind us and soon the silence and peaceful atmosphere of the empty car park gave way to bustling noises which gave me a chance to distract myself; to think of something to say which would take that distraught, haunted look from Edward's eyes.

However, it seemed like fate had other ideas.

"I have to go." Edward announced suddenly; sounding distant and cold. Detached. Damn it! I really had said the wrong thing.

"Edward, wait."

"Alice'll drive you home." He told me simply, already weeding his way through the crowds of leaving students. Getting further and further away from me; from my apology. Why did I always make a mess of everything? Why couldn't I tell Edward the truth? Why couldn't I give him what he wanted and be done with it? Would it really kill me that much to be selfish for the last few weeks of my life?

It'd obviously make Edward happy, and it wasn't like I didn't have the feelings for him. I was pretty sure I'd fallen head over heels for everything about him –every _tiny, little part of him- _and there was really no coming back from that. Already; knowing that he was upset by my rejection was yanking on my heart and making it twang painfully. I was so engrossed in my pain that I didn't notice Alice had arrived beside me until she tapped me on the shoulder lightly; a frown tugging at the tips of her expression.  
Edward had obviously told her.

"I don't understand Bella. Why..."

"I really don't want to talk about it Alice." I cut her off before she could finish that inevitable question. I had no answer; which meant I already knew it'd been a mistake. The only preventing me from hunting Edward down right now and kissing him with a passion was the grip Alice had on my forearm.

"Ok. The Volvo's over here." Seeming grim as she walked sloppily towards the Volvo; I realised that Edward wasn't the only one I'd hurt with my rejection. Alice had obviously known how Edward felt, and now that I'd shook off his proposition of love she was left hurt as well. Typical Bella move. Hurt everyone in the room beyond repair.

The crisp, black leather of the Volvo was temptingly relaxing. The dream catcher I'd given Edward this morning was still hooked up on the mirror; dancing smoothly in the gusts of air that blasted in when the Volvo car doors shut with softened _bangs. _Alice slid the key into the ignition and slipped the purring engine on with a sigh. It wasn't a normal sigh though; it was an "I'm confused and I don't know why you won't clear things up" kind of sigh I knew was going to make things extremely awkward for me.

Going home didn't seem like such an appealing option either right at this moment. A quiet house where I'd be forced to think about everything that'd happened ever since I arrived at Forks? More time and chance for my conscience to eat me up and spit me out? No. I wasn't settling for that.

"Alice, is it possible you can drop me off at the hospital? I'm going to drop in and see Angela. I've been meaning to." The smallest Cullen hesitated for a moment; but in the end she let out a reluctant nod and accompanied it with another sigh.

As we powered down the road down the road; reaching just over eighty; Alice began the inquisition; which I'd known was coming. Tress flecked by us quickly, like nothing was wrong in my reality. I suppose for trees; the worst things they have to face are harsh storms and bolts of lightening. Humans had things much harder.

"I don't understand why you said no to Edward. You seemed to like him just as much-maybe more- than he likes you." The fact that Alice was using the word "like" instead of "love" didn't go amiss on me.

"Are you one of these people who don't do serious relationships? Are you nervous when it comes to commitment? I don't understand Bella. He means a lot to me; he's basically my family even though we've all been adopted and I hate to know that he's hurt. Especially when he doesn't need to be hurt." After Alice's "little sister" speech, no one bothered to break the silence as Alice pulled into the parking lot of the hospital and found a front door parking space; which she keeled into with accurate precision.

"Alice...I'm not going to be here come next week; near the end of it that is. I don't want to hurt Edward any further by getting him in any deeper. I'm never coming back after that. Once I leave that's it. You'll never see me again."  
"Bella, don't be ridiculous. You're only going back to Phoenix. You can come visit after high school; you could go to the same college as us. We could come down and see you. There are endless possibilities!" How I wished I _was _going back to Phoenix; back to my mother and step-father. Back to the porch with the wind rustling through my brown hair.

"I'm not going back to Phoenix Alice."

"What do you mean? Where else could you be going? Did your mum choose somewhere even more exotic for you to live in?" Alice sounded shocked; like she couldn't believe I'd just shot down her comment. I, on the other hand, was suddenly desperate to escape the predicament I'd fallen into. This was close to becoming an extremely sheltered moment; which in turn could lead to me slipping in some accidental information which may give away my future to Alice.

How could I let that happen when it was inevitable after that, that the information would find its way back to Edward?

"I'm going to see Angela now Alice. Thanks for the ride."

"How are you getting home?" I hadn't considered that option. I'll phone Charlie and ask him to take me back home, I announced finally. Alice seemed satisfied with this, watching silently as I wiggled free from the Volvo and closed the door lightly behind me so I didn't scrape the paintwork or anything. A second later, the electric window shot down and Alice poked her head out, her black hair blowing in the wind slightly while mine was out of control, covering my face almost completely. I'd have to get inside fast obviously.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning. We can go shopping sometime next week...or tomorrow." Before I could comment she'd hidden herself inside the vehicle again; closed the window and a roaring sounded as she forced the car to reverse swiftly as she changed gears and shot forward, waving as she passed me. Sometimes Alice could be intensely scary.

I just didn't think she realised that herself yet.

Angela's hospital room was decorated with twenty boutiques of various, colourful flowers; their fragrances vivid and vibrant to smell. There had to be every kind of beautiful flower here; roses, lilies, bluebells, violets, daises etc. There were too many to count.

The room itself would have been dull without them. Angela only had a sixth of the room but hers was by far the most colourful. Her bedcovers (a dull white like at all hospitals) had an old-fashioned patchwork quilt draped over the top of them. Lying in bed –on top of the covers but under the blankets- was a very healthy looking Angela; who had her head buried in one of our homework assignments; one of many according to the binders piled on the side beside her bed; which also contained a pitcher of water which was only half empty.

She looked up when I wandered into the room, and her smile was almost enough to make me forget about my worries. To forget about rejecting Edward and pissing off Alice. Almost enough obviously wasn't good enough though. Those worries were still lingering in the back of my mind; bugging me out of existence slowly.

Another problem for another day apparently.

"Bella. It's nice to see you again. Can you believe my luck? I almost got us both killed!" She sounded ashamed and aghast at the idea that she could accidentally hurt me in any way; especially when the accident with Tyler's van hadn't been her fault. She'd just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. Kind of like me; but maybe I was in the right place after all; thinking about how I was going to die anyway. Why should dying soon be a problem?

"It's not your fault Angela. None of it was." Wincing slightly at the complaining coming from my aching feet; I spied out a free, unoccupied seat and sank into it with a grateful sigh.

"I'm sorry I didn't come to finish you earlier." My excuses fell free from my tongue without being voiced. I couldn't give Angela some made up reason why I hadn't come to finish her earlier. There was none.

"I'll come by tomorrow as well." I added as a compensation for not coming sooner.  
"No, no. Don't waste your Friday night coming to babysit me! I don't want that! I'm sure you have plans." Angela pushed her homework assignment to the side with a look of relief and yanked her blanket a little tighter round her shaking body.

"Are you cold?" I asked quickly, looking for a change in topic before she could start telling me I wasn't allowed to visit her at all. I felt like it was my responsibility to come and check on her.

"Plus, you can't visit me come tomorrow anyway." She beamed at me then and jumped on the bed slightly; getting extremely excited.  
"They're releasing me tomorrow morning. I'm not allowed at school until Monday though; and even then mum said she'd rather I stayed at home for a while. Just to be on the safe side. If I have to spend another moment of her mothering I think I'm going to go insane..." Angela laughed lightly as I smiled in return at her.

"It's good that you're getting out of here so early. How are you? How have you been?" This replaced Angela's smile with a frown and she shook her head; probably to try and clear the jumble of thoughts that had gathered there.

"I'm fine now. No aching, no pains. My neck's not sore any more; even though it's got a killer crick. As for the actual accident...and the parts after it immediately? I can't remember. The last thing I remember is coming over to talk to you and the rest of its blank." I had to admit, I'd heard Charlie say plenty of times that people from accidents sometimes couldn't recollect their memories of the events leading up to it, the accident and the immediate after effects. He said it was normal and nothing to be worried about.

"Charlie told me that loads of people lose their memories after big crashes and accidents. Apparently it's normal." I said, trying to soothe her nerves slightly; which were showing obviously through her disguise.

"I bet it's been lonely in hospital right? No one to talk to for most of the day. It drove me insane." I held my tongue when I realised that I'd let something slip. That I'd basically just told Angela that I spent a lot of my time back in Phoenix in hospitals. She caught onto my mistake as well; which was something I didn't necessarily want her to do.

Why couldn't she let it slide and pretend she'd misheard me? I could make up an excuse she was likely to believe if she only gave me a chance. When I spoke I'd been thinking about the weeks/months I'd spent lying in a hospital bed, almost paralysed with drugs and other chemicals I didn't even know of. It'd been horrible.

In the end I'd put a stop to it; saying I wanted to die in peace with my family outside the hospital. It'd taken a while but eventually they'd discharged me and I'd been free to go and die.

"You spend a lot of time in hospital? Why? Did something happen in Phoenix? Were you hurt in an accident there or something?" Suddenly; the idea of lying to Angela, dodging all her questions seemed stupid. I knew with every ounce of my being that she wouldn't leak my secret to another living soul; not if I asked her to guard it with her life. Unloading it on someone else would make me feel better; it'd help me unload.

"I have leukaemia Angela. I'm going to die before the end of next week." She blinked at me; uncomprehending for a full minute before her eyes bugged open and her mouth fell open. Just as quickly as her reaction had come she'd dissolved in tears which refused to fall from the buds of her eyes. Her bottom lip was quivering.

"You poor..." She couldn't stutter anything else; so she just leant forward and enveloped me in a warm, welcome hug. Her grip was quite tight –and it was tugging at my arms- but I'd never tell her that. Her fingertips were directly over the bruises Edward had made when he'd grabbed me slightly too hard.

"Angela...its fine. I'm fine. I accepted it a long time ago. I'm here to say goodbye my dad. I was scared of making friends here because I knew I'd hurt you when I...left." Once again; I couldn't bring myself to say "died." It was a bad word in my vocabulary.

"Oh my God! How could I not have noticed...how could I not have pieced it together. You were acting distant; and you winced at things that shouldn't have hurt...I should have realised something was wrong. It's all my fault." I wasn't sure what Angela thought she'd done to blame herself for but I knew that she was innocent of any charges. All she was guilty of was trying to be a good friend to me; and she was guilty of succeeding.

"Honestly Angela. Don't blame yourself for this, you can't control who gets cancer and who doesn't."  
"Haven't you had any treatment?" She bit her bottom lip, distracted.  
"It didn't work."  
"Isn't there any other option?"  
"Dying." I said automatically. She winced at my matter-of-fact voice and I immediately felt bad. I'd dropped this on her with absolutely no warning and here I was making it worse by stating the obvious in a harsh tone. Was there no end to my selfishness?

"I'm sorry Angela. That came out wrong."

"It's true though isn't it?" Once again the tears were back in her eyes; and this time they _were _overflowing from her buds onto her flaming cheeks.

"I just can't believe...why you? You're one of the sweetest people I know..." I knew I definitely wasn't one of the sweetest people around; Angela was kinder than me by half but I didn't have the heart or energy required to shunt her comment away so it hung in the air between us; well and truly killing any conversation which might have brewed between us. What were we meant to talk about?

"What have you been doing all day then?" I asked lightly; sinking into the soft, cushioning of the beige hospital chair as Angela hugged the blanket even closer to her for support. I knew it was a lot to take in; and she was actually reacting in a perfect way. She hadn't fainted or screamed. Sure, she'd cried and hugged me and said I didn't deserve it but I'd expected that much. It was something people would find sad after all.  
"Homework. How long have you...you know? When were you diagnosed?"

"Earlier this year." I couldn't remember the exact details.

"Wow." Angela murmured under her breath; throwing herself back onto the pillows of her metal barred bed with a grunt.  
"Wow's one word for it." I agreed, glancing at the homework assignments on the table. Surprised to see today's ones among them I turned to Angela with questions in my eyes.

"How come you have today's homework? Did someone drop it off?"

"Yes. Dr Cullen. He's my...doctor. He said Edward dropped it off for me at reception." The thought of Edward going out of his way to make sure Angela had her schoolwork to keep up on made me feel slightly jealous. I suppose it was a good thing Edward would have someone else to concentrate his love on when I passed away. Angela was a sweet person; he'd get to like her enormously I was sure.

"Angela...can I ask you a favour?" I hated to put Angela on the spot but I remembered that I hadn't asked her to keep what I'd told her a secret.

"You want me to keep your leukaemia a secret don't you?" She raised her eyebrows at me when I gave her a "how did you know what I was planning on doing" eye widenening.  
"I figured as much. You came here no telling anyone so I figured that was for a reason. I'm...happy that you trust me enough to tell me though. Somehow I think knowing is better...we can treasure our time together more."

"I'm looking forward to that." I told her sincerely; "Hey, do you like shopping?"

"It depends what kind of shopping it is. And who for. I can't really by for myself."

"What about shopping with Alice Cullen?" I asked Angela lightly; hoping she'd accept. I wanted Angela to share in some memories before I left. I wanted to remember them. She hesitated for a moment and then nodded reluctantly.

"I'm not sure Alice would want me intruding on a shopping trip she's planned for the two of you."

"She'd love it." I told Angela genuinely; "It means another person to shop for." I hadn't actually been shopping with Alice –I'd crashed my truck into a tree before we'd got there and I'd had to spend the beginning of the night in hospital- but I knew Alice had the enthusiasm and money to buy people new wardrobes in a few hours. She'd been planning on buying me a new wardrobe; which is why I'd swerved off the road. Normal people didn't have the money to buy other people large amounts of clothes.

"Then...I guess its ok. But only if it's ok with Alice." Angela pointed out.  
"I'll ask her tomorrow." I promised, smiling easily at Angela as my eyes flashed to the groggy clock mounted on the lime green wall in the corner.

"You have to go don't you?" Angela asked with a smirk. I did have to go –Charlie would be back soon and he'd be wondering where I was- but I didn't want to leave Angela all alone here with no one to talk to.

"I can spare another half an hour." I told her finally, stopping my attempts to leave the cushioned seat. Charlie would be ok. Angela needed company now.  
"Bella. Charlie will want to spend time with you. Go home, I'll be fine."

"Don't you want some company though?" I asked her doubtfully; glancing at the ward she was staying on. Three of the six overall beds were unoccupied; Angela took up one while an old woman who was snoring took up one in the centre of the room and a teenager with blonde hair and green eyes lay reading a comic book in the other right in the left hand corner of the lime green wall. The lights blinked and fizzled up ahead before settling back into their normal rhythm.

Angela pointed at the doorway; then at me.

"Go. Charlie will want to spend time with you before...you know. I could never forgive myself if I took any time away from him by keeping you here talking to me."

"But..."  
"Go." Angela repeated with a tinkly laugh this time. Giving up; I managed to draw myself free from the confides of my comfy chair and I stretched like a cat who'd just woken up from a long nap. Angela laughed again and waved as I circled round the chair and began heading for the exit of the ward.

"I'll see you on Monday." She shouted after me, smiling slightly with amusement which slowly sank into sadness when once again; the burden of the future settled onto her shoulders. I really shouldn't have laid that weight on her back. She'd spend time worrying over nothing now because I'd been careless enough to spill a secret that wasn't meant to be known by anyone but family.

My self-hatred trip was interrupted by a familiar voice from halfway down the corridor I was walking down –the one neighbouring the ward I'd just walked free from.

"Bella! Wait!" Carlisle.

Carlisle Cullen.

He looked as amazing as the first time I'd seen him and the second; in the private hospital room after the accident with Alice. He was wearing a white lab coat which suited him immensely; but under it I could see his black trousers and brown leather shoes. His hair looked like it was gelled but something told me it wasn't. The colour looked light blonde; almost white in the dull lighting down the hallway.  
"Carlisle. I just wanted to say thank you again; for what you did on the plane. I didn't mean to be an inconvenience to you."

"Nonsense; I was happy to help." Balancing in Carlisle's hand was red clipboard; and when he noticed me looking he smiled and pulled it closer to his chest.

"I just called because I wanted to know whether you wanted a lift home. I was just leaving." To be honest; receiving a ride home from Carlisle would be ideal –and it'd mean not disturbing Charlie to ask him to pick me up from the _hospital _(honestly, telling him I was in a hospital wouldn't go down well) but I didn't want to inconvenience Carlisle.

"It's not out of my way." Carlisle insisted; still smiling as he began to remove the white lab coat from his body.

In the end; the sensible part of me won out and I nodded once.

"Thank you. You seem to be helping me out a lot lately."

"It's nothing. I enjoy helping you." Carlisle said with a subtle shake of his hand as quickly scanned something on the clipboard before looking back up at me; "I just need to go and put these back in my office. Shall I meet you outside in the parking lot?"

"Yes." I said instinctively; "I'll meet you down there." He nodded and turned in the opposite direction to me; the way he'd come.

"I won't be a moment." He promised; already halfway the distance from me as he'd been a second ago. Not wanting to make him wait if he somehow reached his car before I did –I wouldn't put it past these Cullens; they were unusual at their best but amazing and intriguing at the same time- I headed to the lift at what could be classed as a walking sprint, pressing the button three times before I finally stopped and forced my hand down. The mechanical box seemed to take forever to come up; and when it finally did I was shocked to see one of the least likely people in the planet standing in the elevator.

Edward.

I knew there was only one more ward above this one; which meant he'd either been visiting someone on the top floor or he'd come from the bottom floor to meet his father or see Angela. I waited patiently for him to exit the lift; but when he remained inside I took a deep breath and stepped into the confined space with a hesitant smile.

Almost immediately the doors slammed shut behind me; and the feeling of being whooshed downwards overwhelmed my body, playing with my brain's sense of balance. Feeling slightly dizzy; I took a grip on the railing provided inside the box and checked the buttons. Edward had pressed the ground floor one; and apparently there weren't any calls from any other floors; which meant a straight journey down. Having Edward burning holes into the back of my head was stressing me out already, and we hadn't even gone down two floors yet. There were another eleven to go.

Then the worst thing happened.

There was a grinding sound from above and all motion stopped.

Something red flashed on the counter with the floor buttons and then it blacked out; the lights overhead blinked once and then cut off completely. Shocked and scared slightly at the change of events I jumped slightly and looked up in curiosity and questioning wonder. Had the power cut off in the whole building or was I just lucky enough to be locked in an elevator with Edward when I'd rejected him earlier when he'd said he loved me?

What Alice had said to me in the Volvo on the way here and when we'd got here suddenly rang in my head. Was I scared of commitment? Was I scared of committing myself to someone just to leave them? What if I got to this next place and all I wanted was Edward, because I was sure that's how it was going to work out if I allowed myself to feel and express the love I already felt for him; and it was rapidly growing by the second. Being locked in an elevator with him wasn't going to be easy.

"It should come back on soon." Edward said from the very corner of the elevator; as far from me as possible. There was the sound of someone slumping onto the ground, and I followed his example, folding my legs underneath me easily. Well...I'd rather be stuck in an elevator with Edward than with Mike or Jessica. I wasn't sure I wanted to imagine what Mike would do if I was trapped in a lift with him all alone. The very concept sent shivers down my spine. Jessica wouldn't any better with her questions and insults. I'd probably punch my fist into her face before we managed to get out of the enclosed area.

"What do you resent me for Bella? Why can't you love me back? Is there someone else? Is that where you're going to? Or do you just...not like me? I'm not going to judge you Bella, I just want to know." Trying to evade the subject –I was in a dangerous mode tonight; especially after telling Angela about my leukaemia- I played with my fingertips and looked down at them in the darkness; trying to make them out with my lousy eyesight.

"Is there someone else?" Edward persistently prodded. I couldn't force myself to leave him without an answer.  
"Of course not. You're the first person I've met that's...I don't know, managed to get into my heart. I thought I'd locked it down and thrown away the key. Don't get me wrong Edward, I do love you. I can't stop myself from loving you; everything about you is perfect. Your hair, your personality. Your body, your school work. You're the sweetest person I've ever met and I love you for that. For being yourself."

"You...love me?" He sounded daring; like he was breaking a law by allowing himself to hope for my love in return.

"Yes." I announced lightly; breathing quite heavily; wondering how he'd react. He'd only said before that he _thought _he was in love with me. What if I scared him away by pronouncing my love loud and clear when all he wanted was a quick fling which he could move on from with no strings attached? Would he really have told me he loved me if that's all he wanted? Oh, my head was so confused.

"When I told you earlier...from your reaction I thought I'd scared you away."  
"You almost did." I told him in a scolding tone; "I would have appreciated some warning." If I'd have been able to see him I could bet he would have been smirking in that breath-taking way he did. Something shuffled from over the other side of the elevator and I found my eyes straining in the darkness.

Just as suddenly as the shuffling had sounded; a pair of ice cold arms wrapped me from the side and I let out a little yelp of surprise.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to scare you." Edward said immediately, releasing me from his ice cold grip.

"Bring those arms back here mister." I told her sternly; not thinking about what I was getting myself into. I'd already done the damage and admitted my feelings to him. I was done behaving for one night. Tomorrow I'd probably look back and regret getting myself in this deep. Tonight? I was willing to let my conscience and common sense slide.

Edward was so close. His presence was intoxicating. His frozen arms appeared again –I could make out the faint, white outlines in the dark- and then I was leaning into them when they wrapped themselves tightly around me; yanking me closer to their owner until I collided heavily with his chest. I wiggled to get comfortable in his hold, and when I was finally satisfied; I wrapped my arms around myself and wiggled a little more just to annoy Edward.

"Comfortable?" He asked with amusement leaking from his tone. I didn't miss the way his arms tightened when I shifted to pull away.

"Am I making you feel awkward?" I teased. He yanked me closer and I felt his stomach contort as he smirked.

"Not at all. It takes a lot to faze me."

"Really?" Edward shifted slightly in response to my query; and then one of his hands was trailing up to my chin and he'd lifted it up to meet with his awaiting marble lips. It was even more amazing then the kisses in Biology. Those had been impulsive; pure body reactions. This time it was so much more. I was hyper aware of him in the darkness; as I couldn't see him directly my mind made up for it by concentrating on the different aspects of him. The way he kissed me; tilting his lips up slightly so he didn't stand a chance of biting me or anything. A lot of males did that according to my mum. I wasn't sure why I chose that moment to recall such an unusual piece of information; but it made me blush fiercely. Edward might not be able to hear my thoughts but they were embarrassing none the less.

He pulled away slightly and rubbed his hands on my cheeks; cooling them instantly. It was like ice neutralising fire; two elements that suited each other perfectly even though they were opposites. That did seem quite ironic –Edward was perfect, everything I'd never be. We were opposites too.

"What are you thinking about?" His lips lowered to my neck and began littering kisses there, leaving me breathless. Didn't he want me to answer his question? If kept doing that I wouldn't be doing anything for a while.

"Bella." His tone was light, teasing. He didn't stop kissing my neck; if anything he kissed it with a deeper passion; one that almost knocked the wind out of me. I definitely wasn't going to be able to answer his question at this rate. Reacting to his touch, I leant forward and reached out with one of my slightly quivering hands, trying to find my angel in the darkness. Almost immediately, his cool hand collided with mine, and he guided it towards the rest of him. When I was sure I knew the location of his mouth, I leant forward once more and almost instantly sent sparks exploding between us.

He couldn't kiss my neck while I was occupying his lips, which gave me a chance to regain some semblance of human thought. Not much of a chance however, mean as now I was in direct contact with his _lips. _Could things get any more perfect?

Then of course they managed to.

He introduced his tongue into the kiss; forcing an entry open through my mouth. If I thought just lip kissing was amazing; adding tongues made the tastes all the better. Having no proper eyesight because of the darkness I could smell him extremely well; better than normal. He smelled of a weird mix of Latin spices and peppermint; which reminded me of an English granddad sitting on a sandy beach in Barbados. An unusual image to have in your head when you're kissing your...was Edward my boyfriend? I wasn't sure. We'd said we loved each other, we kissed. We spent time together. Were we dating? Could I really set him up to fall like that?

My answer was chosen for me when Edward began sliding one of his hands through my tangled brown hair; unknotting it. His touch sent tiny shivers shooting down my nerve endings; which in turn made me kiss him with a renewed passion and fierceness. I felt him smile against my lips as I pushed myself onto him even more; settling into his lap with a happy moan in-between the kissing.

Before I could rethink my actions –how they'd affect us overall as well as short term- I slipped my throbbing hand under the cover of Edward's shirt and felt his sculpted chest; loving the feel of it beneath my fingertips.

"This has to come off." I told him, mumbling it against his lips.  
I wasn't sure whether he'd hear me; but apparently he did because he nodded obediently and began undoing the buttons. Hating the lack of his hands, I took over and tried to concentrate on that task while he claimed my lips with his again. It wasn't easy I can assure you.

I finally managed it though; and the shirt was dropped onto the floor of the elevator silently, slipping free like it weighed nothing more than a feather –which it probably didn't. Edward smiled broadly as I started tracing circular patterns on his chest. I found myself beaming in response; happy that he was enjoying himself as much as me. I knew he was perfect –which meant he'd be able to satisfy me with anything he did- but I was glad I was living up to his standards to.

The stupid part of me that didn't think of her actions began to take things to the next level without so much as considering the consequences. My fingers started to slide the shirt I'd put on this morning from my body but suddenly Edward's hands were _there_, stopping me.

"What are you doing Bella?"  
"I can see more of you than normal so I thought I'd even the playing field." I told him sternly. He hesitated, obviously unsure of how to continue –probably wondering how best to drop me because I was desperate- but before he could comment I found myself slamming forward into him and recapturing our kiss. All sense disappeared. His hands helped me remove the shirt until I was sitting there in my bra while he was shirtless.

He trailed his hands along my chest and down to my stomach before bringing them back up into my hair; brushing through the strands like they were silk to his touch. I let out a sigh of satisfaction from his touch.

"Is this the part where we officially start dating?" I inquired; leaning back slightly so Edward had a chance to reply to my question. In reply, he grabbed me again and yanked me forward so I was kissing him full out. I positioned myself so I'd turned round in his lap.

We were facing each; we were kissing and his hands were all over me when the worst thing possible happened.

The doors whirred open to reveal a smirking Alice, who had her arms balanced on her hips.

"Am I interrupting something?"

A/N: Ok, not being able to write this story has been killer. The mocks went...okish. I failed my maths already and they haven't even been marked yet. I'm just physic so I know these things in advance. What do you think? Review and send me your opinions. Thanks for reading. I don't own Twilight or any of the characters but it sure is fun writing stuff that'd never happen in reality to them.


	9. Chapter 9

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Nine _

An Athlete on Steroids

Alice Cullen was going to pay for ruining this moment. I knew she probably hadn't known what was happening (from the delighted, all-knowing smirk on her face it was _like she knew,) _but that was beside the point. What she did _after _she caught us made up my opinion of making her pay.

"You know...being locked in an elevator can't be all bad. Let me fetch Jazz and we can have a party." Standing beside her were several doctors and nurses –one of the doctors was Carlisle- and three maintenance workers who seemed to be trying extremely hard not to check Edward out (they were all women.)

Edward shifted beside me; an uncomfortable frown building up onto the contours of his Adonis type expression. His ice-cold hands took a firm yet reliable –unbelievably soothing- grip on my slightly clammy, shaking ones in a show of unrivalled support. My grateful smile wasn't just for show.  
"Alice." Edward barely acknowledged his sister –ignoring her stuck-up frown type smile easily- and climbed to his feet, both yanking me up and supporting me at the same time, like I was some vulnerable glass doll which he was afraid would break any second and disappear from his grip. That wouldn't happen if I could help it.

"The lift's fully functional again." One of the female maintenance workers claimed without so much as glancing inside the metal box I'd been locked inside with the love of my life. The other two nodded their agreement; their eyes fixed indefinitely on Edward; lock sick smirks smeared onto every single one of their pretty, blemish free faces.

The one who'd spoken –her black and white nametag declared her name was Mandy- even had the nerve –when it was obvious Edward and I had been kissing in a sexual way- to approach him slyly –she probably thought it was sexy- and trick her fingers up his collar, fiddling with the buttons.

"If you're interested in finding a special someone to warn you up at night..." I didn't imagine the shudder which ran through Edward's whole body as he pushed her away slightly too hard. Good; the hairs on my arms prickled in a territorial rage. Edward was mine. Seeing other women paw over him –practically drawling- sent jealousy coursing through me in waves. Dangerous, dishonourable waves but feelings that had to be expressed nonetheless. I knew Edward was something not completely human. Perfection like him couldn't come from Earth; from humanity. There were no flaws in his Godlike complexion; his personality was sweet, kind and light-hearted. Everything about him oozed angel. From heaven. With wide wings as silky as satin and as beautiful as Heaven itself.

Who knew? Maybe I'd already died and somehow I'd ended up in heaven. Maybe Edward was my eternal prize for behaving myself in my past life. How was I meant to know? I didn't care what world I was in; what'd happened. The point was I had Edward –against all odds- until the end of next week. I was going to make the most of that time. The only point that plagued my mind –torturously I might add- was the truth. How I'd admit to Edward that I was dying; that he'd lose me even after he'd barely had me a short amount of time. The sooner I told him the better, I knew that with every ounce of my being.

"We'd better...head home. And drop Bella off on the way." Carlisle said swiftly. "Have you got your car with you Edward?"  
"No. Alice brought it." Edward seemed distracted when he spoke to his father; his other free hand crept sexily down to my waist and he pulled me closer to him; like he was afraid I was going to be blown away from him. He smelt absolutely intoxicating. The only want I could conjure into my mind was the want –no, need- to kiss him again. To feel his lips soft and silky against mine; to have that rush of perfection, of adrenaline rushing through my system like there was no tomorrow. For all I knew, there was no was tomorrow. I could die tonight in my sleep; happily. I could have a sudden relapse any second and that'd be it. I'd disappear forever. No goodbyes, no nothing. Just the cold abyss of nothing.

A thought was tugging at my sub-conscious; trying to force me to remember something, but for the life of me I couldn't remove it from the tangle of other memories which polluted my brain; some heart-breaking, some gut-wrenching and some just completely impossible. Nothing was dislodged and brought forward.

"I'll take Bella home. Alice, do you mind sharing with Carlisle?" Edward giving his adopted father a funny look; like he was confused about something. Alice nodded once –accepting without a quarrel for which I was grateful- and without a comment, she grabbed Carlisle's arm and began shunting him towards the exit doors on the ground floor. I was shocked that we'd actually been on the ground floor this whole time; that the only problem had been the doors not opening.

Kissing in that lift –almost going further- had been remarkably like a dream to me. One I'd never wake up from if I had the choice.  
"I know where Alice parked. I saw it on the way in." Edward nodded once to the maintenance women;  
"I'm already spoken for, and I'm not looking for someone else any time soon thank you." His tone was stiff and furious with the pouting worker, and he shunted past her without a comment, making a point of being uncharacteristically unpleasant when he passed; not even bothering to say goodbye. The other two watched him with saddened eyes, muttering something under their breath to each other like they were participating in a game of Chinese whispers. I had a pretty decent idea of what they were mutely commenting on.

Why was I with Edward? What did he see in someone so imperfect when here he stood, almost a God on Earth? They were the same questions I'd continually ask myself until I died. Nothing made sense any more; and even though Edward was my everything now –the reason I didn't want to leave him behind, to abandon him to the cold clutches of this world- the fact that he'd chose me to spend his life with, unknowing that I wasn't going to be around longer than a week? I must have got trapped in a fairytale.

"Are you okay Bella? You're awfully quiet." We followed in Alice and Carlisle's footsteps; I could almost see the imprints of their shoe soles on the mud-capped floor as I walked. A granite, block-of-ice arm was still latched onto mine; cool in its majesty. Edward's other arm was still around my waist; reeling me in closer to him, yet every part of me –my heart, mind and body- wanted to get closer. To close off whatever boundaries still held us apart.

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" Edward began to remove his hand from around my waist –his other hand had already released my shaken hand; I was already aching for his touch back- but I snagged his hand, plucking it from midair and frowned at him, almost snarling in shock.

"You've done nothing to make me uncomfortable. I'd never been more comfortable in my life. Do...I make...you...uncomfortable?" I was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting for the final blow to hit me. Edward couldn't be in love with me. It had to be some bizarre twist of fate. A last game to tug on the hamstrings of my already shredded and tattered heart. Any moment now, Edward would declare that this had all been a mistake and that all we'd ever be was friends. Distant friends. He'd walk away from me and the pain and heartbreak would overwhelm me and no doubt end my life seven days early.

"Whatever gave you that idea Bella? I've never felt more comfortable in my life. There's something about you which manages to calm down everything around me; something that manages to call the war inside me to a truce so I can think clearly for once in my life. You're like a miracle to me. One I don't intend on losing any time soon." With that smile tugging at the corners of his lips –the crooked one which sent my heart into somersaults and back flips of pure ecstasy- he recaptured my hand and waist; settling his hands back in their rightful places.

"Would you like to do something tonight? We could go out for something to eat; or we could go and see a movie." Was he...asking me out on a date? I'd never heard such an idea which sent butterflies into swarms in my stomach. I'd never gone on an actual date with a male before. My friends back in Phoenix had managed it from a young age. They'd all been pretty and confident. I was so used to being the outcast.

"Or I can cook you something. We can go to a private place and talk. It's up to you Bella."

"I'd love to Edward. But I can't tonight." The horrible realization almost made me feel sick; but I wasn't. I owed Charlie time with which he could spend with me. I loved Edward dearly; with all my heart but my father still got priority. Edward had tomorrow, and Sunday and the whole week after that. Edward and I had time. Charlie and I didn't.

His face fell slightly when he spoke but he was kind enough not to comment or ask why. He just fixed me with a bright beam.

"We can...do it tomorrow? If you want? A real date." Once again; his smile multiplied; turning into an enthusiastic expression which made him more Godly by the minute. Every second I spent with him, I felt like I was drunken by his brilliance. Like I was tipsy because of his blinding light and radiance. By his sheer perfection.

"I'll organise everything." Before I could blink; he'd leant down and kissed my forehead with as much passion and romance as he had in the elevator, except this time we had a relatively public audience. Alice and Carlisle had disappeared ahead, already in the warm confides of Carlisle's vehicle no doubt. From here I could see that it was a scarlet Mercedes; or at least I assumed it was a Mercedes from the unusual little trademark sign on the front. Crowds hung behind us, cluttering up the hospital with injuries I didn't dare look at in case there was even a single drop of blood. The sight of the stuff made me feel weak, dizzy and light-headed. The last thing I needed was to spend _another _night in hospital. I only had so many nights left after all.

The silver Volvo was still parked at the very front of the hospital, right near the doors, and Edward opened the passenger door after unlocking the vehicle like a true gentleman. The very sight of his jaw-dropping smile sent tingles up my spine and shivers into my nervous system as I accepted his offer and sank into the plush, leather seat; relieved to find the car cool. The cherry coloured flush rising in my cheeks was a dead giveaway to when I was embarrassed.

In five seconds, Edward had circled round the vehicle and was climbing in the driver's side with precision and accuracy. The key went in; the engine purred to life like a well-tuned radio with no interference. At first he'd didn't pull free from the parking lot, he shifted his body and spun round to face me, genuine truth sparkled in his eyes, fuelled with emotions I'd only ever dreamed someone would feel for me as I felt for him.

"I love you. You know that right? My life...revolves completely around you. Losing you would destroy me. We're soul mates. There's no way I'd be able to carry on without you." His confession left me breathless, winded and on an all time high all at once. He was terrified of losing me yet he had no idea that he'd face that horror sooner rather than later.

"But why am I dampening the mood? I really am clueless when it comes to romance. I just wanted you to know that Bella. That I love you more than anything else in the world. You're my everything." At this current moment Edward seemed like a dream. The best one I'd ever which was about to come to an end because there was no way this could be real. He was an unrivalled beauty so vibrant that even a proud, dignified lion would whimper in its majestic shadow. How could someone as weak, meek and feeble as me even dare to imagine standing beside him as his partner? His equal? It wouldn't work; it'd be disgraceful and unfair to people who'd earned the privilege.

What had I done to deserve Edward?  
I shoved that thought aside. I didn't care whether this was reality or heaven. I didn't care whether I'd died or whether I was still living. Even though I knew I might regret it later, I put no thought into self-hatred. For the moment it didn't matter if Edward didn't need me. If I hadn't done anything to earn the heaven of having his company; of having a relationship brewing between us.

Four words were all that mattered.

My whole universe vibrated on them; the whole axis of the Earth spun because of this fact. This one tiny phrase kept my heart beating alive and well; full of fire. I'd never really die when I felt like this.

"I love you too."

Having Edward declare his love to me and me return it had only made the situation worse. I'd been right in my attempt to dismiss his loving comments before. I was an evil, demonic monster who was going to crush his heart because I was too selfish to tell him the truth. To admit what was going to happen to me.

Edward had told me to phone if I wanted to meet up and have that special night tonight instead. Instead of admitting I wanted a date with him –there wasn't anything to admit, I wanted to get romantically close to him more than I wanted to breathe, maybe even survive my leukaemia- I'd been considering and asking to meet up so I could tell him the news. Break the truth to him in person. Telling him about my death sentence over the phone was whimpish and cowardly. Edward deserved better.

But every time I thought I'd managed to talk myself into telling him the truth, a sour thought always strayed into my brain and I whimped out of it. By the time Charlie rolled into the house; I was a bag of nerves, reaching for the phone one second and then shunting it away with incomprehensible force the next. Why couldn't I make a decision already? It wouldn't kill me. But maybe the stress of this whole decision/situation would.

"Bells?" Charlie called my name tentatively but with a hint of desperation. I was aware that I'd normally be downstairs preparing his dinner right about now, but my thoughts had pre-occupied me. Yet another I was too selfish about. Charlie deserved an effort from me. I was already abandoning him; how could I even contemplate dying when I had so much left to make up for?

None of this was fair.

"You here kiddo?" His tone was even more desperate; like he was scared I'd fallen over somewhere and keeled over. Like I'd left him alone already.  
"I'm here dad. I'll be right down." I heard the sound of Charlie's relieved sigh downstairs.

"Okay kiddo." Footsteps retreated from the stairway into the lounge, and minutes later the television snapped on, blaring sounds all the way up to my room with its door positioned wide open. Once more, I found my hand inching towards the phone, intent on telling Edward the truth but I slapped it lightly and climbed up from the bed, leaving the phone in place.

I couldn't even consider telling Edward yet.

Neither of us was ready for that hurdle yet, which is why I headed downstairs and replaced the phone in the cradle.

If I didn't know anything in this world; the one thing I was certain off was that the news I was dying? It'd be withheld from Edward for a little longer. Telling one person was enough for one day.

Charlie was shocked I'd actually spilled the beans to Angela.

"She won't tell anyone." I assured him, glancing once at the clock on the corner of the television which had popped up in surprise. It was already eleven o'clock and I hadn't so much as yawned. I really was shocked. Normally my leukaemia forced me to bed early because every part of me ached and I could barely keep my eyes open from lack of energy. Maybe, with the end approaching I was finally getting a break. Maybe not, I didn't care.  
"I know Angela. She's a sweet kid. But it doesn't mean she's silent. What if she accidentally tells someone at school?"

"She won't." I insisted.

"It's a lot to take in. Learning that one of your friends is going to pass away because of a...disease." Charlie scowled when he spoke of the cancer which was taking my life. He hated the thought of what he'd go through when I finally left and I didn't raise the subject, knowing it'd make him uncomfortable. Maybe it was about time I forgot about making him comfortable and faced the facts.

But not tonight. I wasn't ready, as I'd mentioned before to face Charlie or Edward.  
"She'll keep the secret dad. I trust Angela. She'll be back to school on Monday, so I'll be able to spend some time with her one night of that week okay? I'm heading to bed now, I'm wiped."

"Night kiddo. I think I'm going to head up too. I swear, I had no idea it was this late until you mentioned it." The TV was switched off and we both stretched slightly, eyeing the stairs with disbain. Neither of us felt like climbing up them to warm, welcome beds. We wanted them down here already.

"You first." I gestured to the stairs and indicated Charlie. With a lazy walk, he managed to drag himself up half the staircase before he turned to check if I was following. I was. We ascended the rest of the staircase silently; and we parted ways at the top to go to our appropriate rooms.

I had a human moment and then shuffled into my bedroom, crawling under my welcoming covers with a sigh of utter bliss.

Those hypnotic, welcoming eyes shone through the shield of my blind outside. I could see a silhouette perched outside watching over me, it had Edward's eyes. I had no idea whether I'd already fallen asleep or not. I didn't care.

Knowing some part of Edward was close to draw enough.

My guardian angel watched while I slipped into unconsciousness, protecting me from all around me. Keeping me safe, warm and loved.

Never losing that legendary crooked smile even when I descended too deep for dreams to wander in my brain.

Being at school was a relief. The car journey with Edward had been amazing in all its brilliance but it was hard not to miss the awkward tension between us. Edward knew I was keeping something from him and he wanted to know what. I knew the feeling when the suspense of something you didn't know beat hard against your curiosity, causing you to feel all sorts of wild emotions and to think up endless scenarios which couldn't be true.

Mike, Eric and Jessica tried to continue questioning me about Edward, about our relationship. I think the males were asking questions which focused on how he treated me and whether I thought it'd last that long. Mike even had the nerve to ask me to the cinema with him even when it was plain I was dating Edward Cullen. Jessica had looked at me with fierce, ferocious eyes. in no way, shape or form was she any friend of mine but I was too tired and frankly –I didn't care enough- I didn't tell her to move away from me and to stop pointedly asking questions. When she'd accused Edward –her and Lauren- of assaulting me, of being violent, I was pretty sure I'd smack her, bruise her pretty face and never speak to her again. Yet here she sat before me like nothing had happened. Maybe popularity made you do crazy things.

"Are you eating with...the umm...Cullens again today?" Mike's voice was barely above a stutter –and a nervous one at that- as we headed towards the canteen. The conversation was light around us –Jessica, Lauren, Eric and Tyler had tagged along behind us- and I doubted it was because they had nothing to talk about. They were waiting for an answer to Mike's question.

"I don't know." I replied honestly; shrugging my shoulders and upping my pace slightly, hoping to avoid another question from Mike. One I no doubt wouldn't want to answer. Too late.

"Are you and that Cullen kid serious?"  
"His name's Edward." My teeth gritted rather noisily, clenched against the annoyance leaking through our pour on my face. Couldn't Mike mind his own business for once and let me just...relax? Let me not have to worry about saying the wrong thing.  
"Are you serious?" Mike repeated.

"More serious than you can imagine Newton. Your mind goes to what? Junior High when it comes to sexual activities so leave the complicated stuff to the pros." Emmett had somehow snuck up behind me –all the bulk as well- as silently as a snake slithering along a path under shelter, stalking its prey. Mike frowned up at Emmett; and up, and up. Emmett was just so much bigger, taller and muscled than Mike put together with Tyler and Eric. I'd hate to get on the wrong side of this guy.

"Now, if you'll excuse me pea brain, I want my brother's girlfriend to get away from bad influences and come and find some real fun." Before Mike could muster up a weak argument which would no doubt set the guilt of abandoning him when he'd been so nice to me rolling; Emmett grabbed my forearm rather tightly and yanked me through the doors of the canteen and towards the line for food.

Silence descended almost immediately. Anyone who'd been eating dropped the food in shock. Anyone who'd been chewing stopped grinding their teeth against their sustenance. Conversations were cut short and then silenced. Emmett didn't seem to notice this in the slightest.

"What do you want to eat? Turkey and tuna?" He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively as we joined the back of the short line. Before I could move he'd picked up two trays and handed one to me with a sketchy bow which brought out the dimples in his smile. I must have blushed when he mentioned turkey and tuna. That was what he'd wanted on my first day of school when I'd got in his way and he'd almost knocked me over.

"Sure." With that same, oddly perfected smile; he grabbed a pre-packaged box and slapped it down onto the tray.  
"What about pizza? Everyone loves pizza,"

"Do you?" He shot me an "I wasn't including myself in the statistic" look and shook his head, trying to keep the disgusted glare from his expression.  
"I'm...vegetarian. Can't eat that stuff."  
"What? Pizza? That one doesn't have meat on it." I pointed to a pizza slice which contained almost everything except meat. In front of it, a small, white notice read _Suitable for Vegetarians. _

"I don't pick and choose. What about this?" He held up a bottle of water and placed it squarely on his tray, extending a second bottle I hadn't noticed he'd grabbed in my direction. I thanked him and continued filling up the moulded plastic which was almost scorched at the ends. For such a big guy, Emmett didn't pick up that much food. It was like he wasn't hungry or something; or he was nervous and he was afraid to eat.

After paying for our separate meals, he waltzed straight over to his usual lunch table –where all the Cullens were already settled- and took a seat beside the beautiful Rosalie, who was frowning. She leaned in and whispered something in his ear which made his smile fall, and he grabbed her hand and shook his head brutishly. Alice and Jasper were also deep in a conversation –but this one seemed to be going well- which was lodging on the edges of turning into a kiss. Feeling like I was intruding on a private moment; I sank into the seat beside Edward and poked at my food, not wanting to eat and spoil the surreal atmosphere which had zoomed around this table and enveloped it in glitter dust. It was like we were in a completely different world to everyone else. Like there was a veil between reality and this dimension; the one I was sharing with the most magnificent creatures I'd ever seen.

I almost asked them right then and there whether they were another which wasn't human. I knew how crazy it'd make me sound but I had this intense urge to clear the air between us. Between Edward and I. He had a secret but so did I. Maybe we could do a compromise and find out what we were hiding from each other.

The dream I'd had a couple of nights ago; about Edward and his family helping me out of a black area if I just learned their secret. If I stayed long enough to hear it; if I tried hard enough to hear it. The images from that dream haunted me; it was like I'd been presented with the answer on a platter and I'd stared uselessly at it, needing everything spelled out to me for it to make sense.

The accidents; the weird occurrences. Everything had to deal into what they were and I was just overlooking something. Something important. Maybe I wasn't willing to stretch my mind to the extremes, and because of that I'd never be able to accept what they were. Maybe to a human it was impossible for whatever they were to exist. Maybe they were scared it'd be too much for me.

"What's wrong Bella? You've been distracted ever since last night."  
"I just...have some choices to make."

"Are you still leaving at the end of the week?" Jasper asked lightly, emerging from his intense conversation with Alice with barely a flutter. Alice spun round to pin me with her hawk-eyed gaze.

"I've never wanted to say "no" more in my life but yes. I have to leave at the end of next week. Maybe earlier."

"Bella, there's something we need to tell you..." Alice looked at me with her intense gaze; Jasper was looking at his girlfriend with the weirdest expression, like he was shocked, nervous and angry all at once. Like he wanted her to tell me but he was scared of the consequences. Emmett was smirking like a big goof –I already liked him- while Rosalie almost had a roasting fire in her eyes which could physically scorch me to death.

Edward was the worst though. He glared at his little sister with unrestrained anger; with red-hot fury.

"No we don't Alice. We talked about this already." My head whipped from Alice to Edward, measuring his expression. Was learning his secret worth risking his love? His happiness? Was Alice about to admit that they were angels sent here for some bizarre reason? Had I slowly gone insane from the strain of eventually passing away? My belief in things _non-human _had grown since I'd been diagnosed.

I didn't believe that being a human was all we had. That after we died –passed away- there was nothing else. There had to be something else out there, something strong, pure and welcoming. Something we'd fight for our entire lives. Something we'd do anything to reach, and if that place existed then what else could? The world was full of mysteries we were too scared to uncover so they remained veiled from our eyes.

I wasn't short-sighted like most people.  
I was okay if Alice was about to tell me something surreal and unusual. Something a normal human would phone the guys in white shirts with crisp needles for. Something that'd no doubt get them all locked in a padded cell and me along with them.  
"You have to tell her Edward."

"No." His glare was worse than Rosalie's; and having it directed at Alice was making my feelings go all hay-wire inside. What had happened to make him so angry at her? What had she been about to tell me that Edward hadn't wanted me to know?

"So you're just...going to hide it? Pretend it's not a huge hurdle that you have to face sooner or later?" Alice rolled her eyes sceptically when Edward growled at her. I repeat, _growled. _Why on Earth had that sound came from his throat?

"Alice, I'm warning you. No more talking about...that subject." Before Alice could comment, Jasper took her hand and shook his head in a gentle reassurance of listening to Edward's advice. I was slightly disappointed; I wanted to know the secret.

"You're going to run out of time." She whispered in a barely audible voice. Emmett looked at his adopted, little sister with those playful eyes slowly broadening to become serious. Rosalie lost her scowl. Jasper seemed to be taunted with something as he shifted in his seat. Alice only had eyes for Edward; not angry ones at being shunted but sincere, warning ones. Mournful ones.

"Maybe you should go Alice." She narrowed her eyes at him and shoved her seat back without a word; retreating from the canteen with Jasper in tow. Both left their trays on the table for someone else to take. It seemed like they were in a rush to leave.

"Edward."  
"No. If you want to talk about anything but normal topics leave with Alice and Jasper Emmett." The big Cullen seemed to sulk for a moment, poking a fork at the food he'd eventually selected. Rosalie played absent-mindedly with the tips of her hair while Edward just sat there...brooding. They were all ignoring the stern silence which had descended on the canteen after the argument between the elusive Cullen siblings had ended.

The pressure of silence was getting into my head and knocking everything against each other, causing me to worry and stress over everything and anything; practically driving me crazy. No one spoke for a full five minutes; and then Emmett –being the joker I knew he was- managed to lighten the mood.

"Do you want to hear more of our vacation stories Bella? There were loads I didn't get to tell you yesterday." Yanked back from my deliriously worried and stressing state, I nodded once and shot him a grateful smile he'd probably decode as being unnecessary.

"Well...there was the time we were at the Lake District and Alice was getting stalked by this insane tour guide fifteen years older than her and female..." And so began the reel of family moments which sent sparks of delight and home sparking through me.

Edward didn't come to Biology. He didn't say anything about why; he just kissed me goodbye and wandered out of the building and into the parking lot like it was normal behaviour for someone to skip a lesson so publicly. It didn't matter, without my _boyfriend _–I loved the word right now, not as much as I loved Edward though- I was prone to word attacks by Mike; who sank into the seat as soon as it became obvious I was alone.

"What was with the Cullens at lunch today? They were acting weirder than usual."

"Private sibling fights. Every family has them." Mike frowned at my dismissive tone but he didn't take the hint and remained in Edward's seat. Mr Banner wandered into the room with a white box full to the brim with some weird kind of equipment I didn't take the time to register; which would not be for my benefit later on.

"Bella." Mike snapped his fingers in front of my face –right near my nose, practically on the skin- when it became obvious I wasn't listening to a word he'd said.

"I said; it's not normal for them to fight. Normally they're silent and stuff. Almost invisible." The fact that they were no longer remaining as statues seemed to be bug Mike no end but he wasn't stupid enough to state that fact out loud. At least I hoped he wasn't. Edward might be within hearing range or something. Or the words could get back to him. I might not like Mike but I hated the idea of him going up against Edward and his brothers, especially Emmett.

"Well...every family has some speed bumps."  
"Okay class..." Mr Banner shut up Mike's next comment cold and stared at him for a moment.

"Newton, why have you switched places?"  
"Bella was lonely Mr Banner." I almost scoffed at this statement but the teacher beat me to it.  
"I think Miss Swan can manage on her own for one lesson. Come up here for the example and then go back to your original seat." At first, Mike didn't react. He just sat there awkwardly; staring at the teacher like he'd just told him Santa wasn't real or that he'd had a winning lottery ticket worth millions but it'd expired. With a shove in the gut from my elbow –which hurt me later on- Mike was propelled out of his seat and to the front of the classroom. He'd left his bag at his normal seat; which saved him from tugging it all the way to the back and wasting everyone's time.

Mr Banner removed a needle from the box in a clear, crystalline case and brandished it for everyone to see. With quick movements, he snatched one of Mike's hand and extended a finger out straight. The next thing I knew; he'd stuck the pin and a bead of red blood leaked free from Mike's finger slowly; like it was a leech suckling his skin for sustenance.

"We're going to be finding out your blood types today. Everyone –in a minute- take a needle and a slide to put the blood in please." The whole class almost jumped forward eagerly but Mr Banner shushed them impatiently.

"To process the blood, simply put the finger _on here..." _He pushed Mike's finger onto a piece of flimsy white paper and mounted it in-between two pieces of glass. His fingers held it steady as he presented it round to the class to stare at. Before the stench of fresh blood could overwhelm me and empty the contents of my stomach, I raised my shaky hand into the air.

Any second now; that horrible, rusty smell would intoxicate my lungs and no doubt knock me out clean, which was the last thing I needed.

"Yes Miss Swan?"  
"May I go to the nurse? I feel faint." It was the first time I'd ever asked bluntly but I couldn't bring myself to care. All I wanted was to escape the close confides of this room; to escape the sulphuric stench which was about to attack me any second. If I could just get out before it came and sank into the flesh of my bones...I'd be alright.

"Would you like someone to come with you?" Mike already had an offer on his lips but I shunted it quickly.

"No, I'll be okay on my own thank you."

"Ok. Make sure you copy up the notes before next lesson." I nodded my agreement and quickly left the classroom, dragging my backpack behind me. I was a couple of seconds too late. The smell sank into the room like some sort of deadly gas; still and silent until it attacked, slaughtering everyone inside mercilessly.

The walk to the nurses office was quick but daunting at the same time. She'd no doubt refer to my records and assess every single part of me for any bad symptoms. I had no idea why medical people made such a fuss when they knew I was going to die anyway. It didn't make sense. Did they feel a sense of responsibility to give me a day or two longer than I'd originally thought I'd be granted with? Was it just to give them a sense of fighting to save me even when it was mission impossible?

When I arrived the room was empty. Completely empty except for the nurse, who smiled warmly at me.

"Isabella Swan. We're doing blood typing in Biology. I...couldn't take the sight and smell."

"Just take a seat honey." She pointed to an unoccupied bed with a sheet of plastic rolled out over the top and I obeyed her instructions; feeling uneasy as I dropped my bag down onto the floor and kicked my body up slowly; scared of inspiring my leukaemia to take a kick at me. It seemed behind in torturing me lately; everything had almost been normal again. There was no pain, no exhaustion, no aching. Maybe I was too far gone to suffer from such side effects. I had no idea but I was grateful it'd finally packed up.

The nurse flicked through something on her computer and let out a sigh.

"I thought so. Your records say you have leukaemia. The final stages." She spun round on her cheap, vinyl chair and fixed me with a sympathetic look I from everyone who knew the truth about my condition. Sometimes I felt angry that others acted so upset when they were just secretly relieved it wasn't them suffering from the fate.  
"I've got until the end of next week apparently." My voice sounded rehearsed, like I'd told this story three or four times over. While she clicked away at the computer I took my time in examining the room, taking in the details.  
"Just come in here a second honey." The nurse beckoned me to some sort of side office, and feeling confused as to why she'd want me to come there, I followed anyway and sat down in the seat she offered me. When she turned on her heel and walked out once more without even an explanation; I was all ready to jump up and demand to know why she'd done such a thing.

Groaning sounded from outside, and someone was complaining loudly about something. The nurse appeared a second later.

"False alarm. I thought it might be something bleeding." She let me back outside again, blocking whoever had come in. I could hear a booming voice from behind a curtained cubicle.

"For the last time, I'm not on steroids. I'm just strong." The voice sounded vaguely familiar. Another voice –this one Coach Clapp's- came from behind the cubicle as well.  
"Knocking a basketball hoop off the wall –nails and all- is not normal. No one is able to do something to that degree. Why isn't this needle going through your skin?"

"I don't know, and for your information; it's easy enough to break a basketball hoop, you just need to hit it from the right angle."

"And is it completely normal to lift seven females on your shoulders like they weigh nothing more than flour? There's something wrong with you young man, and if it isn't steroids then what is it?" Silence met the Coach's speech. The other person didn't reply.

My brain was working overtime, trying to figure out who it was. Their voice sounded so familiar; like I'd heard it a second ago. Who was strong enough in this school to do the things the Coach was accusing? That's when it hit me. I recognised the voice as Emmett's.

He'd been accused of doing supernatural things. Stupid things that a human wouldn't be able to manage. The nurse shook her head and let out a slight chuckle.  
"Some people don't realise the value of life. I'm sure with your leukaemia claiming your life; you've learnt to appreciate the little time you have left right? Five, six days. A week tops." Silence fell on the other side of the curtain. The nurse glanced uneasily at it, like she'd been caught gossiping by someone of high importance.

My own heart was jumping double time as I tried to think of excuses why they'd suddenly gone silent. There was no way Emmett could know about my disease. No way could he know about my deadline. His family were close; he'd tell Edward; and Alice. I wasn't ready to admit the truth to them yet. I got the feeling Alice already knew something was terribly wrong from her speech at lunch today; when she'd been saying about running out of time.

Time was one thing I was running drastically low on.

"I have to get back to class. Nurse?" Coach Clapp emerged from the curtain and glared at Emmett when he made a move to get up and out of the cubicle.

"You stay inside there Cullen." Emmett sank back down again, peeking at me through the curtain edges with a shocked, upset expression on his face; just like someone had told him his favourite dog was dying or something. An animal he cherished and loved.

"Can you get another needle from the store for me? This one seems to be broken."

"Of course." The Coach handed the needle over and some sort of paper to the Nurse I didn't know the name off.

"Thank you." Both left the room to go about their business; Coach Clapp held the door open and allowed the Nurse to go first with a smile. When they'd both bustled off down the hall, Emmett broke free from the cubicle and stared at me for a second.

Neither of us knew what to say. How did you start a conversation when you'd just learnt one of you was dying? At least I didn't have to keep insisting on lies that I knew no one believed about when I was leaving or why. He knew everything now. Emmett cleared his throat a couple of times and looked out the window; seeming to think before he opened his mouth and said something which would no doubt make this a lot more awkward than it needed to be.

When he finally seemed to have collected himself, he turned back to me with one of the most serious expressions I'd ever seen on his face. One of loss, mourning and sadness.

"Why didn't you tell me us you were dying Bella?"

A/N: I've had a lot of reviews asking about what's going to happen to Bella; so I'm going to be kind and tell you all a little bit; enough to put your minds at rest. Yes; all the Cullens (including Edward) are going to find out, as you've seen in this chapter with Emmett. I'm writing two alternative endings to this story (one where she dies and one where she gets changed) but I'm going to publish them at the same time and there are going to be warnings on the top, of which is which ok? I hope this clears things up for everyone. Thanks for reading and please remember to review. I don't own Twilight or any of the characters (unfortunately.) What a bummer.

P.S. For all those who are unsure; the Cullens are vampires and all the pairings are usual.


	10. Chapter 10

**********CHAPTERS 1- 10 BY lilsparkingauthor, POSTED HERE TO AVOID MULTIPLE POSTING RULES.**

**Sleeping Angels**

Bella has leukaemia. With the last couple of weeks approaching before her time is up, Bella decides to go and spend some quality time with her father. While enrolled in the high school for the last time in her life, Bella meets the Cullens and falls in love with Edward Cullen. But with the hands of time ticking her last minutes down how can Bella bear to tell her one love that he's going to lose her before he has a chance to spend any time with her? Sometimes love hurts but will Edward be strong enough for the alternative?

_Chapter Ten_

Love is not Enough

Taking into account the current predicaments I'd been finding myself in lately; I wasn't surprised things had burned down to this conclusion.

Someone had to find out at some point. It was inevitable. Emmett was a good choice as well. I'd rather it be him than Jessica or Lauren. Or Mike, Eric or Tyler. I'd rather Emmett find out than Edward. Even though Edward would soon know. His brother wouldn't keep something like this from him. Not when it was his brother's girlfriend at stake. I'd never expect anything different from someone honest and loyal to their family.

"Why? I wasn't ready to tell anyone. It's a difficult thing to work into a conversation don't you think?" Emmett didn't so much as crack a smile. Not even a tiny one. I was already missing those dimples of his.

"It's something you should have told us. Told Edward at least."  
"Wasn't Alice acting like she already knew anyway? I'm not the only keeping a secret." I demanded my tone harsh and suspicious. Emmett seemed caught out for a moment.

"_We _want to tell you the truth. Edward keeps saying no."

"Why? You know my secret now; and you're going to tell Edward and the others..."

"I'm hopping you'll tell them first. Edward especially. He's been through a lot." Emmett's eyes were shaded with worry and nerves; something completely unsure of fate and destiny. Every part of me ached to know what their secret was; my brain couldn't think about anything else. Learning that Alice could possibly already know that I wasn't going to be here come next week was a major honesty factor. There was a lot I had to face if I wanted to be honourable in death.

"You're right."  
"Aren't I always?" Emmett's tone had sunk into that familiar tenor of teasing; his lips had stretched into that familiar smile with his heavenly dimples. The only thing which showed any of his _real _emotion was his eyes; and they were foggy, misty and confused all mixed into one. Like an animal that'd been treated for a dire injury but in the process had been separated from its pack with no way back home.

"But...just give me some time okay? I'm not...ready to tell him yet."

"When are you going to be ready to tell him? You said before, it's not the kind of thing you can drop into a conversation."  
"I just need to figure out what I'm going to say first."  
"Well...start with "I'm dying of leukaemia." I have a feeling he'll get the message." Emmett's tone had turned into one of condescending; like he was stating the obvious to a child. Brief flashes of anger flashed in his eyes, unwelcome and confusing but still there. Still stuck in his depths like a chill to your bones. Was Emmett angry at me for having leukaemia? For not telling them the truth? For coming here in the first place, meeting their brother? For leading Edward along when all along I knew I'd never be able to stay with him?

I wouldn't blame him if he was thinking those things. If he blamed me for hurting Edward beyond repair because I was too selfish to admit the truth. To leave those around me free from hurt and harm. To leave without hurting anyone; causing them distress.

"I didn't mean to hurt you. To lead him on you know. I really did come here to die; to say goodbye. I guess my heart doesn't know the difference or the pull was too strong to deny. The honourable thing to do would be to leave Edward alone, to put that distance between us so he can learn to live without me. It's unfair for it to have even reached this point..."

"No. That's not the right thing to do Bella." Whatever had been screaming through Emmett's eyes –uncontrolled and rabid- halted almost simultaneously; the seriousness in his tone drew my thoughts to a standstill and forced me to re-evaluate my words. Where had I gone wrong? I'd promised to leave Edward alone, to let him carry on living without polluting his world further with my presence.

Did Emmett want more than that? Did he want me to disappear back to Phoenix? That was one thing I wouldn't do. One thing I couldn't sacrifice on the life of me. Charlie was here; it was his time. His goodbye. His closure.

"I'm sorry Emmett. I can leave Edward alone but I can't _leave_. Charlie needs me."

"Leave? I didn't say anything about leaving Bella. I just..." Before Emmett could explain more fully what he'd been barking up the tree at with his comments; the Nurse came bustling back into the room, packing a clean, new needle which looked razor sharp. She examined it momentarily, moving it from left to right; its silver, metallic surface glinting in the fluorescent lighting- and then without warning she plunged it towards Emmett's arm.

A feeling in my gut was telling me it'd never go through. Whatever the Cullens were hiding; whatever they _were_; needles didn't pierce them; and true enough, it got to the texture of Emmett's marble skin and snapped like a twig underfoot somebody pacing through the woods outside. Another strange occurrence.

"I tried to tell Coach. My dad uses these weird moisturisers and stuff. They harden you skin up."

"I'm sure tat wouldn't prevent a needle piercing your skin young man." Even as she said it; the Nurse looked unsure. Carlisle was obviously well known among the staff, renowned for his medical abilities. Why would Emmett include Carlisle if it wasn't true? He was an honest man who did his best to help everyone.

"Would you like me to phone him and ask him?"

"And disturb him from his work?" The indecision flashed once more in the Nurse's eyes as Emmett started to head towards her station; where the phone was waiting there, powerless at the current second but almost a ticking time bomb waiting to devastate the word.  
"No. There's no need to disturb Carlisle. I'm sure your explanation is satisfactory."

"Great. I'm going to get changed then." The big doofus bundled out of the room and disappeared down the hallway; sprinting faster than a normal person would ever be able to accomplish. The Nurse watched in fascination as he finally turned a corner and was lost from our sights.

"Extraordinary family." She mused.

"Extraordinarily lucky." I corrected; not wanting her to reflect on anything else the Cullens had done in the past which was unusual beyond compare.

She didn't seem to notice my words as she disappeared back into her office, intent on something that would no doubt knock me into the realms of boredom.

Biology wasn't an appealing option. Half the lesson still remained of blood typing; which wouldn't be of any benefit to me. Managing a face plant on the floor was a sure way to persuade everyone I was completely normal. Think again Swan.

So the question was; how did I waste half an hour with doing nothing? It was boring and I'd never occupy myself. Returning to Biology would be a cleverer option.

An indulgent part of me urged my legs in the direction of the parking lot. The scenery there had to provide some sort of cover so I could skip class and not get spotted by anyone of authority. The shadows might play with my imagination and create slightly terrifying images but it was worth it. At least I wouldn't be bored. Self reflection wasn't something I wanted to waste time doing but I knew it was somewhat necessary if I was truly going to keep my word and face Edward; admitting the truth. Facing the consequences of my admission. Finding out his secret before I passed away. One final indulgence to satisfy me as I passed on into the next dimension or whatever.

"You're awfully quiet." A voice said suddenly. My wandering had brought me to the silver Volvo. Complete with its owner inside, lounging freely while playing with one of the volume knobs on the radio. I couldn't hear the melody playing but it sounded suspiciously like Clair Du Lune. I loved Debussy. It was some of my favourite music.

"I didn't know you'd be here." I'd learnt –from that statement- that I was particularly good at stating the obvious. Edward obviously didn't know what to say to my stupidness either, because he just chuckled lightly under his breath and reclined further in his seat. The passenger side was hanging open freely, clearly left there as an invitation.

Was now when I admitted the truth to him? Did I tell him my secret _right now _and ruin any moments we could have together of _normal _interaction. I knew I'd be treated like glass –maybe like something even more delicate- once Edward knew about my disease. I knew I'd see the loss and sadness rifling through his eyes. I knew the pain of losing someone you loved would run through both of us and connect us in a way we'd never been together before.

"I guess I have a lot to think about."  
"Penny for your thoughts?" Edward's voice was gentle, kind, caressing. I wanted nothing more than to listen to it forever; like a constant CD I could just have in the background, never stopping. Never disappearing; never ending. An eternity of Edward was sounding pretty good right about now.

"I was thinking of the best way to say goodbye." I blurted out rather stupidly, sliding into the ready and waiting passenger side of his idling vehicle (the engine had been switched on to function the radio after all.)

Edward's head spun slightly so he could look directly into my eyes, destroying any hopes I had of keeping my head clear. Had his eyes always been so telling? So alluring? There was something new about him right about now...something...fierce. Desperate. Determined was the word I was looking for.

"Why would you need to say goodbye?"  
"Because I'm leaving next week."  
"Bella...I was hoping you'd change your mind. I'm not sure...a world without you is worth it. Not any more." Oh boy.

"Don't say that Edward. Please. You have so much to live for. Don't waste your life by choosing me over everything else."

"But I would." Edward leant forward intently, clicking the chilling tenor of Clair Du Lune off without a second glance at the radio. His intoxicating scent wafted over to me and engulfed me in its warm embrace. The most welcome, perfect aroma. I'd gladly drown in Edward's smell.  
"I'd do anything for you."  
"Anything?" My tone had sunk into a serious note. If I asked, would Edward find himself someone else when I died? Would he manage to be happy? I couldn't mean _that _much to him. He was sheer perfection –a God- so there had to be someone equally as perfect as him out there. Waiting for their chance.

"Yes. Anything."

"Would you move on if something...happened to me?" I couldn't help getting nervous. We were nearing dangerous territory. Words were waiting anxiously on my lips, waiting to break free and admit the truth. He has a right to know, the part of me with a conscience insisted. You claim to love him yet you haven't –refuse to- tell him your biggest secret. If you really love him then you'll be able to make this sacrifice.

Do it. Stop being a coward.

"I'm not going to lose you Bella." Edward's eyes had narrowed in confusion; he reached out with an ice cold hand ran it along the length of my sweating cheek. He paused briefly on my lips, staring at them with wanting in his eyes. I'd never had this sort of relationship with a male before. Everything was so _new_, so tempting. I wanted to do so much with Edward before I ran out of time. Yet how did I tell him that without it coming out sounding cheap and tacky?

Romance was core in any relationship. That and honesty, which was why I needed to spill the beans before I lost my nerve; which was small to begin with.

"Edward...you are going to..." Before I could finish my admission, someone knocked heartedly on the window. A little pixie someone.

Alice had a habit for interrupting some...telling scenarios. First in the elevator and now...when I was about to tell Edward my secret. There was no way I could admit it now. Not with Alice listening in as well. Both of us sat in silence for a moment, stiff and awkward; then Edward finally let out a sigh which blew air into the dream catcher balancing from his centre mirror as he clicked open the passenger door again –had I closed that when I came inside the car? I must have- to allow his sister access to our private sanctuary.

She was completely oblivious.

"Hi guys. I just wanted to give you these. Pardon slips, so you don't have to go to last lesson. After what happened with blood-typing and everything..."

"Wait, how did you know?" My mouth must have been hanging open in shock. Edward seemed even more surprised.

"Were you hurt? What happened?" Alice answered before I could.

"Bella can't stand the sight of blood. She went all faint in the class and had to go see the nurse. She ran into Emmett there. He got accused of taking steroids _again_. That's the eighth time with year so far. I'm counting."

"How do you know all this Alice? The blood typing only happened...half an hour ago. You would have been in class."

"I needed the bathroom. I witnessed the _whole _thing. From the classroom to the nurse's office. Sue me, I was curious." Every single part of me went stock still. Alice had said the _whole thing_. Did that include my conversation with Emmett? The truth coming out about my leukaemia?

Suddenly my nerves shot up higher than ever before and I squirmed in my seat. Alice glanced at me once, no doubt wondering why I was suddenly acting like I was trapped between two lions waiting to hunt.

"I'll take her home then Alice."  
"I'm coming round later to check on you Bella. Plus, I think it's about time I met Charlie. Properly anyway." Before either of us could comment, Alice started for a long while straight into Edward's face, clearly trying to communicate something I wasn't meant to hear or eavesdrop on; then she sighed and tapped the side of the car lightly, slamming the door closed.

As Edward reversed and drove slowly out of the parking lot, Alice waved us away, something suspicious and saddened in her eyes.

Her visit tonight wasn't going to be easy because those saddened, doe-like eyes said everything.

Emmett wasn't the only Cullen aware of my secret.

"You've been silent ever since Alice interrupted our conversation." Edward said lightly as he pulled the silver Volvo into the drive of my white house with its rotting planks and rusting gutters. Home sweet home. Once the engine was cut and silence gained rein inside the vehicle again –sheer, undisturbed silence- the heavy burden of things unsaid descended on my head again. It was wrong not to tell Edward but I couldn't rouse myself to say the words. I'd been ready to admit it to him back in that parking lot but Alice hadn't just interrupted; I was beginning to think it was intentionally.

Maybe she wanted to talk a few things through first. I wouldn't blame her. Learning that your brother's girlfriend –who was clearly head over heels, obsessed for- was going to die in the next week had to come as a shocker. I was surprised she hadn't blurted it out right then and there, regardless of Edward's presence.

"Thinking about?" Edward mused, watching me sideways through his eyes. His whole body was held straight against his seat; his face was facing forwards but somehow I could feel his fiery gaze on me. Centred on nothing but me, my eyes. The lying and deceiving appearances based there.  
"Yeah. I seem to do a lot of thinking nowadays. You must have had a bad influence on me." The joke wasn't meant to lighten the atmosphere; I was merely saying it because I was stuck on anything else. A single, serious thing could blow my secret wide open.

"What were you about to say? Before Alice interrupted? I heard you say "you are going to..." and then you never finished the sentence. Not even when she left."

"It doesn't matter."  
"It does." His insistence must have been my downfall because after I let out a loud gust of breath –one I let loose to prepare myself- I decided that there was only one right thing to do. Begging, pleading, hoping for something –someone- up there to go right for once in my numbered life; I spat out the words required.

"I'm not going to _leave _next week Edward."

"What do you mean not _leave_? If you're not going to be leaving then where are you going? What's going on?"

"I'm going to...I'm going to die Edward. Next week is my last week of living. I have leukaemia. The final stages." For a second; nothing registered in Edward's eyes. From his stance it looked like my words hadn't sunk in either.

Stretching between us was miscommunication. I'd lied to him and his entire family. It was right to tell them this, to admit the truth. Someone would have told him eventually, I reasoned. Carlisle or Emmett. Even Alice if I was right in thinking she already knew. Doing it myself was just a better method; more honest as well.  
"I don't...understand." I bet he didn't. If someone dropped that bombshell on me with absolutely no warning I'd be shocked as well. Uncomprehending.

"I came to Forks to say goodbye to my father. To Charlie. I never meant to lead people on...to lead you on. It would have been easier to just...make a point of telling everyone at school but I couldn't. I'd hate the looks of sympathy. I'd hate how people would be scared of saying the wrong thing. It'd be too hard to look in people's eyes and know I was going to hurt them by dying. By leaving them." I'd come here aiming to avoid that hurdle; yet I'd run right into an obstacle and held on for all I was worth.

Well, coming clean had cleared up one thing however. At least Edward had to fall no deeper with me. He could just...walk away. Forget about me before he fell in too deep and hurt himself beyond compare. Yeah. Like any of my plans actually work.

"You're...you have...I still don't understand, why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"It's not the sort of thing you drop into a conversation." I tried to avoid his eyes but it was almost impossible. The determination –like an unquenchable fire burned bright, its limits only barely restrained- but I saw new emotions there too. Ones that almost overwhelmed him and came flooding out. On normal occasion, someone would have cried to let all that repressed emotion out; but I knew Edward wasn't that sort of person. In his mind, a gentleman didn't cry. It simply wasn't done.

"Plus...I didn't want to make you feel like I was...trying to pressure you into anything. Admitting something like could come across as being double lined; it could have meant anything to you. I just wanted us to have some time together where you didn't know about the sword waiting to slam down on me. I wanted us to be like normal couples, even if it was just for a little while. I didn't want to hurt you." Edward seemed lost on all accounts after that admission.

I can't suppose he had experience with this sort of thing after all.

He probably only had to worry about escaping from females once he got bored of them in a relationship. He seemed to attract anything female within a twenty metre radius without any difficultly.

"You have leukaemia?" That eerie essence of gold said so much more than his words. He wasn't just asking if I had a disease; he was asking millions of questions within one. He wanted to know how long exactly, what was happening, if it hurt. Anything would suit him; answers that he wanted were all he could demand. He had every right.  
"Why tell me now? Why not before? Or why not at all? You said yourself it's not something pleasant; and it'd have made our time...less strained. All I'm going to be thinking about is the time I eventually lose you. I'm not sure I'm going to be able to handle the _thought_. I'm not even considering come the end of next week."

"I told you, because I don't want any secrets. Relationships are built on trust; and that was a mighty big secret hanging between us. You really think I should have kept it to myself."

"You didn't want any secrets between us? Our relationship?"

"And you had a right to know of course." There was something guilty glinting in his eyes. I knew he and his family shared a secret; I knew there was something going on that made them super strong, super fast. Edward and Alice had proved it between themselves in certain accidents involving me. Emmett had proved that their skin wasn't normal when that normal had refused to penetrate the skin. I knew honesty went both ways, but I didn't have a mean enough heart in me to demand that Edward spill his secret right now because I'd spoken mine.

It'd have to wait.

"Is that what Alice wanted to talk to you about?"  
"I think so. I think she overheard Emmett. The nurse said something and Emmett heard." Another strange point. Emmett shouldn't have been able to hear the words she'd been speaking. We weren't that near to him. The Coach hadn't commented; which either meant he was keeping it to himself or he hadn't heard full stop. But Coach Clapp had been nearer to me and the Nurse than Emmett. None of this made sense.

"Why didn't _she _tell me? Or Emmett?"

"Neither of them knew. Not until this afternoon." I felt the need to stand up for his siblings. From the sound of it, Edward was coming across like someone who was trying to blame his siblings for this bombshell; for this speed bump in the road; yet I knew it was nobody's fault. Fate had dealt a hand and I'd been unlucky enough to get caught out. Stuff happened, I'd accepted the inevitable long ago; it was –however- beginning to get remarkably getting harder to stick to that resolve when I knew that I'd be abandoning Edward; when I knew that he was going to miss me anyway.

"My father knows doesn't he? He was thinking some weird things back at that hospital when we got out of that elevator..." Edward suddenly cut off with his sentence, realising he'd said something which made absolutely no sense.

"Thinking? As in, in his mind? How would you know Edward? You can't read minds. It's impossible." In some ways, the change of subject was a relief. It stopped things from becoming too overwhelming.

"Just a slip of the tongue. I meant what he was _saying_. With everything you've just told me...I must be scatter-brained."

"I suppose you are." I didn't sound in the least bit believing but I knew I couldn't very well demand he tell me what he really meant.

The alternative to what I was thinking, to what he'd said was bizarre. Impossible.

There was no way Edward could read minds.

Not in this lifetime anyway.

After a few minutes of basking in the silence of each other's company –neither of us knew what to say- we decided to part ways. I knew my news would be a lot to take in, and privacy would probably be appreciated immensely. I'd give Edward anything I could. Even if it was time _away _from me when that's the last thing I wanted in this world. My time was being counted, it seemed stupid to waste it on trivial things like making others feel comfortable; yet I couldn't help myself. I'd give Edward every last second of my day without a complaint. You did that for people you loved after all.

"I'm glad you told me." Edward muttered, not sounding too sure of the words. I wasn't sure whether he was speaking and expecting a reply or whether he was simply stating a fact.

"I'm glad I told you as well."

After that, I headed into my home and Edward drove the Volvo away stealthily and silently without glancing back. That couldn't be a good sign. Worrying about something I couldn't do anything about, I trekked upstairs and retreated to the comfort of my springy bed, hoping for a few precious moments of peace and quiet.

I fell asleep almost instantly.

The dream was the same as I'd had a few nights ago; when I'd seen the Cullens crowding around me, sympathetic. Offering me something I didn't know about. Was it something to do with their big secret? While I was thinking these thoughts; someone snuck up behind me and wrapped their arms around my waist, pulling me into their slim frame, so cold I was sure I was embracing a block of ice for a single second before he spun me round gently and I came face to face with my Adonis.

My one perfect person.

"Bella. I was waiting for you."

"I'm here." I glanced up into the eyes of perfection and relaxed almost instantly against him, untensing in every part of my body. There was something about being with Edward which was just...right. There was no other way to explain it. The mood was light, romantic.  
"Yes you are. But not for much longer." His grip tightened, and I heard the protectiveness flare into life. I knew this time would come sooner or later, I knew it was unavoidable. A part of me bathed in it and hoped for it to continue. It meant love; it meant someone didn't want me to leave. It meant someone would do anything to keep me around a while longer. With that feeling came a sense of belonging which couldn't be beaten by anything else. It was a feeling above all else.

"I'm here as long as you need me. All that changes is my form. I promise I'll always be with you."

"But I won't be able to hold you." His arms realised me from their grip on my waist and he brought both hands up to caress my cheeks. I sighed against his touch and turned my face into his left hand, allowing the right to move through the silky strands of my brown hair, fiddling with them as a crooked smile stretched onto his lips. Even that looked strained. Tainted by my news.

"I won't be able to touch you and tell you "I love you"."

"You can still tell me you love me. I'll always hear you."  
"But you'll never be able to say it back. Not in a way I can hear." For the first time since I'd met this God, I was starting to see his weakness. The cracks in his perfected physique. It was slightly unnerving that _I _was the reason he had a weakness. It was even harder to think that _I was his weakness. _The only danger to Edward was losing me; I was certain of that with every ounce of my being suddenly.

It was like having an epiphany.

"I won't be able to kiss you."

"Please stop Edward. I can't stop death. I can't stay here when I'm being forced to go somewhere else. I'm sorry but we both know what's going to happen is inevitable."

"It doesn't have to be." Suddenly the sadness disappeared. Edward was excited, eager, dangerously close to ecstatic. What had brought on the sudden personality change? There was no reason for it. No reason at all.

"Edward. You can't stop death."

"There is a way." He bit his bottom lip; seemingly convinced that he'd found the perfect solution to this "problem." Part of me wanted to know, part of me hoped he had found a way to prevent me dying, because I didn't want. It scared me to think I'd never come back to Earth; that I'd leave these people forever. The unknown was a daunting factor which played deeply on my mind.

"What do you mean by that? I don't want you to get hurt trying to do the impossible..." Hope had leaked into my tone. I needed to squash it before I encouraged Edward to something reckless and irresponsible. What if he got hurt trying to finish this quest? What if he didn't succeed? What if he did? What would it cost me? Him? So, so many questions.

"But Bella, there's one thing you'll have to lose if you do this."

"Anything Edward. As long as you don't get hurt." He pulled me further into the warm embrace of his arms and inhaled deeply from the pungent stench of my hair; exhaling in something of a blissful way. He pulled me from his chest so that I could stare directly into his dazzling eyes. So I could see what he was saying. How serious he was.

"Bella...I can save you if you give up one thing." He went silent for a second, physically waging a war inside himself by the looks of it; it seemed like a side had emerged in victory when his features blocked up and squinted; but he continued nonetheless. Never breaking eye contact; "Give up your soul and I can save you Bella."

I woke up before I could deliver an answer. Whether the answer would have come from dream me or the real me I had no idea. There was only one thing I was sure about, and that was that I needed to know Edward's secret. There was no way I could go on pretending it wasn't important. This was the second dream I'd had. Both had been visual, they'd almost told me the secret.

Almost. Something had always kept me from learning the truth; and it ended as soon as I faced one of the Cullens. I'd shared my deepest secret, now it was their turn.

I was proud of myself as I marched down the stairs, solid –like concrete- on my resolve to find out the truth. Not a single ounce of uncertainty sank into my heart or brain; and when I saw little Alice lounging in the living room, on the couch, with her feet up, watching the telly on the lowest volume, the only thing that flared was my need to know the answer.

Why wasn't I asking now? She was sat before me, waiting for me to begin the conversation. I could lead it, I was in charge here.

"Alice."  
"Bella."

"Let's skip the fine print. You know I have leukaemia. You know I'm going to die. Emmett, Carlisle and Edward know, now I want..."  
"Edward knows?" Alice's eyes narrowed. Not in surprise but in uncertainty. It was like before, when Edward had practically said he read thoughts. That he could tune into people's minds. Somehow Alice had known already that I was going to tell Edward. She was more worried about his reaction to the news.

"In my opinion he took it rather well."  
"How did he take it exactly?"  
"We just...talked." I decided not to mention the dream I'd just had. It'd rattled me deep inside with the asking price which had been demanded. Dream Edward had asked what I was willing to give up staying with him; I'd said anything. Was that really true? Would I give up my soul to satisfy humanity? To stay as I was? To live a normal life with Edward and his family? Did I have the right to change the course of death?

The questions buzzing round my mind were anything but comforting. They rocked the boat inside me. One second it was leaning towards granting Edward what he wanted –anything- and the next I set my boundaries and stuck to them. I didn't give up so easily.

Which was more important after all? Edward or my soul?

No contest. Edward. By a mile. There was no point having a soul –being alive- without Edward there. Living simply wouldn't be enough.

"Talked about what?"  
"Things. Stop changing the subject Alice. I want to ask you something now. Something important. Something I don't want you to lie about."  
"I can't tell you Bella. I'm sorry but I can't." I ignored Alice's insistence.

"You said at lunch...you were talking about something weird. You seemed to know before the whole thing with Emmett. It was like you knew I had leukaemia already. How did you do that? How did you know about the blood-typing thing? How did a needle not puncture Emmett's skin? How did you stop my truck from colliding with that tree without getting hurt yourself? How did Edward stop that truck from sliding into me and Angela? How does Edward always know what everyone's thinking? How, how, how. That's all that's going through my head right now Alice. Questions. And it's driving me insane." Alice didn't reply at first to my plea for answers. She seemed to be debating something. Weighting the pros and cons.

"You have no idea how much I want to tell you right now Bella. Regardless of Edward, of what he's said. Ordered more like but still. You wouldn't believe us even if we told you." Something inside me jolted. It had to be something unexplainable. Something a normal person wouldn't believe.

"Alice, I understand that some people are closed off to different things. But knowing I'm going to die has opened me up to a lot of things. I believe a lot more now."

"You won't believe this Bella."  
"Try me." When I wanted to be, I could be persistent. I knew that from experience.

"Bella..." Alice sounded pained. Like I was personally making a struggle of something for her when it could be simple and easy. Well, I was dman well going to make it difficult then. Anything I could do to get answers was fine with me.

"Don't Alice. I'm not asking you to tell me everything. I just want to know why you do things aren't human."  
"We're not human." Her voice was low. Serious. Completely honest, believable.

It was a shame what she'd said wasn't all that believable. But for some reason I had no reason believing it. I hadn't been lying when I'd said I was a lot more open to the supernatural now that I was going into something completely shrouded in black myself.

"I knew that already." Alice glanced up at me, hope in her eyes. She'd obviously been expecting her admission to scare me away. It had done the opposite; all I wanted right now were answers. One of my endless queries was answered at least. They did impossible things because they weren't human. They were...what were they? I scanned back to my dreams, trying to piece together something.

The first thought I had was that they were angels. Sent down to bring me to heaven or hell. It made sense; there was no other reason these perfect people would talk to me, spend time with me. They were enormously rich, and almost famous at the high school. We came from two social circles.

Yet something felt off when I named them as angels. The definition didn't feel right.

Angels seemed...to tame. There was no way someone like Emmett could have wings and hold the key to getting into heaven. It wasn't physically possible. A character like Emmett would be someone playful, teasing; never down or holding a grudge.

My mind was going faster than usual, coming up with more and more possibilities until it took over my mind and refused to release me. Why wasn't Alice finishing her admission? Why was she leaving me on a cliff hanger? It was playing with my mind and causing me to imagine horrible, terrible scenarios.

"You're not...scared off by what I just said?"  
"Alice. You've made me intensely curious. What are you if you're not human?"

"I can't tell you anything else."  
"Alice..."  
"No. No amount of begging is going to change my mind."

"What if I promise to let you go shopping with me?"  
"That's going to happen anyway."

"What if I let you pay?" She raised her eyebrows at me.

"I was going to do that anyway as well. You're not tempting me much here Bella. Offering things I'm already going to get."

"Who said I'm going to let you go shopping with me? Who said I'm going to be around that long? I could keel over right now from an unknown cause. No more shopping trip because there'll be no more Bella." Alice winced at the tone of my voice –uncaring, cold- and I realised how harsh I'd probably sounded then. I wasn't trying to be mean, I was just angry that she hadn't unravelled the mystery yet. It was driving me up the wall not knowing.

"I'm sorry. I'm so used to...knowing I'm going to die." She winced once more, and I reminded myself that in the future I'd do best to avoid any mention of my impending death. This relationship was going to be like the one I had for Charlie. Neither of us spoke about it until it accidentally slipped into the conversation. It wasn't welcome in our midst because it meant time was running out. That scared us.

I knew it was bad to hide from the fact I was going to die. I knew it wasn't doing anyone any good because it'd just make the final separation all that much harder; but Charlie and I had a silent agreement. I didn't mention it and we just spent as much time together as possible. There was no point wasting the time I had left moping over what I'd never have when I had things left that I _could have_. What a stupid way to spend my last months.

"Right. I'll just...not mention any of it. We can pretend it's not there. This huge milestone that's not going away any time soon."

"I'm sorry. I must be coming across as being judgemental and things. You tell us your secret and we don't tell you ours. At least not completely." She hesitated a second, unsure whether or not to continue. After an invite from Alice, I slid onto the couch beside her and she wrapped her pixie like arms around me.

It was nothing like how I felt with Edward; but Alice had rapidly become my best friend, so it was comforting to be close to each other. To know that I'd always have someone to talk to no matter what, even if some subjects were sorer than others.

"I understand."  
"Well, that's good because I'm far from understanding any of this."

A/N: Here is Chapter Ten; and for once it isn't on a cliff hanger; well, it isn't my definition of a cliff-hanger anyway. I don't own Twilight, any of the characters of anything else which has been copyrighted by Stephanie Meyer, which is kind of obvious.


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N: Hello, and welcome to the continuation of Sleeping Angels by lilsparkingauthor. I'm TheSingingGirl, otherwise known as TSG, and lilsparkingauthor has most generously said I could continue with her story. We're starting here from chapter 11, so if you've found this via my profile, it will not make the tiniest bit of sense. Go to lilsparkingauthor's profile first. And without further ado, here is chapter 11!_

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We sat like that for a while, not really saying anything. I'd read somewhere once that friendship wasn't being able to talk to someone; it was being able to stay silent and not feel awkward. When I'd first got to know her, I'd thought Alice would be the kind of person who couldn't keep quiet, even if she were gagged, but I knew her better now.

"Alice," I started, but then stopped again.

She turned her head to look up at me. Even sitting down, she was tiny. "What?"

"You're not… is anyone mad at me?"

She frowned. "For not telling us? Well, I wish you had, but—"

"No, I mean… for leading you on. For trying to be friends with you and just leaving you to deal with it next week when I—"

She drew back and interrupted me before I could even say the word. "Bella, no! That's just ridiculous. It's hardly your fault that… that you're ill, and even if I had known, I'd still have wanted to be your friend. And Emmett. And nothing could change Edward's mind about you."

I bit my lip. Part of me believed that, and it was a much larger part than it had been even yesterday, but there was a part of me that was still unsure, and that quietly reminded me that he hadn't come back after I'd told him. I glanced at the clock.

"Charlie'll be home in a minute," I realised. "I'd better start dinner."

A funny thing happened then. Alice's face went completely blank. Not like she'd just realised something, or she was bored. It was instantaneous, for one thing. And she didn't seem to be quite _there_.

It only lasted about a half second, and then it was gone. I was going to ask her what on earth that was, but all of a sudden, the phone rang. I jumped, but Alice didn't react at all and I scolded myself for being so twitchy. I went into the hall to answer it.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Bells." Charlie. "I'm sorry, kiddo, but we've just had a missing person reported down at La Push. He's just fifteen."

I understood. "I hope you find him. How late are you going to be?"

"Don't wait up for me. I'll grab a pizza or something."

"Sure. See you tomorrow, Dad."

I replaced the phone and sighed. Sometimes, I wished my dad did something else. All the cases he got, they just reminded me of how people were so careless with life. Even if this kid had just gone off for a couple of days, he'd be making his parents so needlessly scared. And if someone had kidnapped him, murdered him, what the hell gave anyone any right to steal someone's life like that?

"Bella?"

Alice was standing in the doorway. To my horror, I realised that I was crying, and quickly wiped away the tears. "Yeah? Um, my dad's gonna be late at the station, so…"

"Are you okay?"

I nodded. "I'm just feeling a bit emotional, I guess. Lots going on."

"You can say that again."

She smiled, gently, and I tried to do the same back. "I'm sorry about all this, Alice."

At that, she rolled her eyes. "Don't apologise. Life's—"

"—too short." I finished. "You won't upset me, I promise. Like I said, I'm a bit too used to this."

She looked at me with something unfathomable in her eyes, but then it was gone. "By the way, Rosalie just sent me a text. She's coming over."

"With Emmett?" I asked. It was only reasonable. I hadn't said two words to Rosalie before, and I didn't think she'd even looked at me.

Alice shook her head. "Just her. She'll be here in a minute or two."

"What? Why? Does she know?"

This time it was easy to read the guilt in her eyes. "It's very difficult to keep secrets in our family. Emmett will have told her, even if Edward hasn't gone back home."

"Where else would he have gone?"

She didn't want to answer, that much was clear, but she recovered. "Going out for a drive, maybe? He likes driving."

I refocused. "Why would Emmett tell her? He even said that he hoped I'd tell you all, rather than him."

"They're so close," she excused him with a grimace. "They've been going out for ages, they can't keep secrets from each other. Same with me and Jasper. He knows as well."

"But—"

"Please don't ask me anymore," she begged. "I'd love to tell you everything, but I can't. I hope I can change his mind, but it's Edward's choice."

She turned her head towards the front door just a second before we heard the knock, and was opening the door before I could get there. Sure enough, I could see Rosalie's gleaming blond hair framed in the doorway, and I could just about hear the whispering between them. In the few seconds it took me to reach them, they seemed to have decided something, because Alice stepped back. For some reason, she looked wary, but resigned.

"Hi, Rosalie," I said.

"Hello," she replied.

Alice looked from her to me to her again, and then sighed. "I'll be off then. I think I'll go find Edward."

"Don't let him know I'm here," Rosalie warned her.

"You're not—"

"Of course I'm not. I'm trying to do the same thing as you."

I was getting thoroughly confused. "What are you trying to do?"

She looked at me, and I was surprised to see the fire in her eyes. "Change Edward's mind about telling you our secret."

I stared at her for a moment.

"See you tomorrow, Bella," Alice said.

"Oh, wait, Alice, I think me and Charlie are going to La Push tomorrow to see some old friends."

She didn't respond immediately, but she did exchange a loaded glance with Rosalie. "Right. Sunday?"

"Um…"

I didn't know. I couldn't forget that the reason I'd originally come up to Forks was to spend some time with my dad before I died. That hadn't changed. What had changed was that I now had more people up here in Washington that I cared about. That I loved. Didn't they deserve more time with me, too? Didn't I deserve some time with them? And where was Edward? How did Alice know he wasn't home?

Alice broke through my agonising. "I'll call you. See you soon."

With that, she was gone. I almost didn't notice that I heard no car start up. I was too busy staring at Rosalie Hale.

Rosalie was the last person I'd expected to call. From the lack of conversation between us, I would have guessed that she didn't like me. Or she didn't approve of my relationship with Edward, however she classified it (I knew I still didn't have a clue what to call it). Or she didn't like the intrusion into her family. Today, though, she wasn't wearing the scowl I was used to seeing, even if she still didn't look exactly happy to see me. Instead, she looked guarded, but purposeful. This wasn't a social call.

"Can I come in?"

Mutely, I nodded, and she made her own way through to the living room, leaving me to trail behind.

Dressed immaculately as always, her hair coiffed and her lips and nails painted a vivid scarlet, she looked completely incongruous on my worn and threadbare sofa; she perched on its edge as if she, too, felt that this wasn't her natural habitat. Though Alice was almost as absurdly beautiful, she was more natural here. Alice looked as though she could belong anywhere. Rosalie just didn't. Awkwardness hung in the air as we both took in this odd change of scenery.

"Can I get you something?" I asked, eventually.

She looked away from the embarrassing pictures on the windowsill to fix me with her piercing gaze. "You really don't know then."

It was tempting to blink and ask what I didn't know, but I knew it wouldn't do me any good. Instead, I forced myself to look evenly back.

"No, I suppose I don't."

A smile, wry as it was, rendered her face even more radiantly beautiful for a split second before flickering away once again. "But you know more than you should."

Almost warily, I sat down in Charlie's customary armchair and wondered, briefly, what he would think to find Rosalie Hale sitting here with me. "And you're not going to tell me anything more, are you?"

She considered me for a second. "I told you I wouldn't. At least not yet," she amended. "But time isn't exactly on our side, is it?"

"No," I agreed, slightly surprised she would refer to my time limit so easily.

She nodded, as if approving of my reaction. "Can I ask you a few questions?"

"Sure," I agreed easily.

There was a beat before she began. "How certain is it that you're going to die?"

I frowned. "A hundred per cent, excepting miracles."

Again that brief ironic smile. "You said the end of next week. That's seven days. How do you know so exactly?"

"Well, it's an educated guess, but they're good at guessing nowadays," I told her. "I might get a day or two more, maybe a day or two less. My body's giving up. It won't last much longer."

"Does it hurt?"

Both of us seemed surprised by that quick question. Slowly, I nodded.

Although she didn't bite her lip or fidget in any way, I suddenly got the feeling that Rosalie was nervous.

"Why are you here?" I asked her abruptly.

She frowned. "I told you."

"No, but why now?" I asked. "Just because you found out I was dying you decide to, what? Start talking to me? You want to tell me something Edward doesn't?"

"Why now," she repeated with the most shallow of laughs. "The girl with seven days left to live asks why now."

I could almost feel myself getting angry. "This is why I wanted to move: so people wouldn't look at me differently. I've had enough with the pity and the stares and—" I took a breath to calm myself. "I don't want you deciding how to treat me just because I'm dying."

She looked at me, hard. "You can't escape it, certainly not with us. You dying makes all the difference in the world."

"Why?"

"I can't say. Not yet. But let me ask you one more thing: are you ready to die?"

"Yes. No, wait, hang on."

I had been. Last week, I had been pretty much ready to die. All my boxes had been ticked, apart from spending time with Charlie, and I'd achieved a bit of that now. Renée was prepared, my few friends in Phoenix had drifted away through all my time in hospital. In short, I was okay with my time schedule. Sure, I would have preferred to live longer, but if I couldn't, I thought I'd at least accepted that.

Now, I wasn't so sure.

Everything had changed. I had new friends: Alice, Emmett. I didn't want to leave them yet; I wanted to get to know them. I actually wanted to go shopping with Alice, just to see how bad she really was. I would have loved to spend an afternoon just goofing around with Emmett, maybe see if his basketball skills really were as unbelievable as they seemed to be.

And of course, it wasn't just them.

Edward. How could I feel ready to leave Edward? We had only just begun to be together. We didn't know each other yet. I wanted to know everything about him, from his birthday to the birthday present he would never get but would always want. I wanted to spend time with him, kissing him, talking with him, going on silly teenage dates. I wanted to live out a future with him. I was still teenager enough to shy away from any concrete details about that future, but I wanted it, whatever it was.

And I didn't want him to have to leave me, either. He'd said already that he wouldn't be able to stand it; how could I inflict that sort of pain on him?

"No," I realised. "No, I'm not ready." The tears started to slide down my face and I tried to wipe them away. "Sorry," I told her, embarrassed to be crying in front of her.

She didn't come over to comfort me, but she didn't look uncomfortable or annoyed. Instead, her face softened slightly. "Don't be sorry. I can't imagine what it's like for you. And—"

But she cut herself off, and whatever false hope she was about to offer remained unsaid. I was glad. I didn't want to have to correct her.

"I'll let myself out," she said gently.

And I was left there, curled up in my father's armchair, crying and contemplating just how much I suddenly didn't want to die.

* * *

_A/N: Now, as you may have noticed, there's one major difference between my writing style and that of lilsparkingauthor, namely that my chapters are quite a lot shorter. About half the length, in fact. The main reason for this is that I can churn out 2000 words in a single sitting, which is how I prefer to write. However, I thought it was only polite that I ask you, the readers, which you would prefer. Review or go to my profile to vote in my poll with your preference and I will abide by your decision. Otherwise, I hope you feel that this is a good/true continuation of what is a brilliant story and I shall try to update soon! Thank you for reading._


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: I'm not going to make excuses for myself. Instead, I'll tell you the results of my poll: four votes for any length, three for long chapters and none for short. Hence, here we have a long chapter, with just a bit of experimentation. Enjoy!_

* * *

Saturday dawned bright – unusually so for Forks – and I decided to take it as a good omen. I'd needed that cry last night, though to do it in front of Rosalie was embarrassing to say the least, but I'd done that now. I wouldn't waste any more time on tears if I could help it. After all, I wasn't achieving anything with them. Resolutely, I decided that today, I was going to be absolutely positive.

That started off with eating breakfast for a change. Glancing through the cupboards, I quickly discerned that unless I wanted Charlie's customary fare of bacon and eggs, my only option was plain cereal. I had been intending to do a grocery shop but I'd got a bit caught up in other things this week. Keeping up with my purposeful mood, I added shopping to my day's plans. I hadn't driven since crashing on Tuesday, and I wondered if perhaps I should get Charlie to take me instead. Then again, there was no reason I would lose concentration so drastically if it was just me in the truck.

I glanced at the ceiling as I thought of Charlie. He must still be asleep. I had no idea what time he'd got in last night, but I knew he had taken the whole weekend off for me. Now I felt kind of guilty about that. What if him being at work helped them find this missing kid?

Nothing I could do about that, I reminded myself firmly. Positive day, remember?

As I sat down with my cereal bowl, I pushed my thoughts away from the missing boy. Naturally, therefore, they wandered straight over to the topic I'd been thinking about pretty much non-stop this week.

The Cullens. What were they? Not human, as we'd established. Beyond that, my mind drew a blank. What was there to be, apart from human? Angels, but I thought not. They were – he was too vulnerable for that. Superhero? But that seemed so ridiculous. Alien? Now I was just being stupid.

What, then, did I definitely know about them that made them different? Cold, hard skin. Supernatural strength and speed. Inhumanly beautiful, of course. They didn't eat or drink. And…

Something Rosalie had said last night abruptly came back to me: _You can't escape it, certainly not with us. You dying makes all the difference in the world._

Did she just mean that in that we had so little time left? Or was she talking about something else? Did death mean something different to them than it did to me?

But that was stupid again, I thought, remembering Edward's reaction to my secret. His reaction to death seemed pretty… well, normal, I supposed, if there was a 'normal' way of reacting to a situation like this.

My mind was still buzzing when I finished my cereal, no closer to any logical conclusion. Maybe that was why I wasn't paying enough attention as I scraped my chair back and started to head for the sink.

My foot caught on the table leg; the bowl fell from my hands; I tried to grab it and in doing so completely neglected to try and break my fall. The last thing I heard was the ringing of my spoon as it clattered onto the hard linoleum floor.

* * *

"_She doesn't want to die, Edward!"_

"_She doesn't want this either!"_

"_How do you know that? She doesn't even know it's an option."_

"_It's not an option, Alice! If I told her, can you imagine the pressure on her? That would be cruel."_

"_No, what's cruel is not giving her the right to make an informed decision."_

"_You don't know her, Rosalie."_

"_I know enough, you pigheaded idiot, and you should see that she's mature enough—"_

"_You hate this life! You didn't want to be changed at all!"_

"_She 's in a completely different situation to me!"_

"_How so?"_

"_She has you."_

"_Stay out of this, Jasper."_

"_Why should I? Edward, you need to calm down and look again at what you're saying."_

"_He's right, Edward."_

"_No. No…"_

* * *

When I awoke, I knew immediately where I was. Long familiarity with hospitals meant that they were completely unmistakeable to me.

What wasn't immediately clear was why I was here. What had I been doing? Today was Saturday, and we were going to see Billy and Jacob. I had gotten up, had gone down to the kitchen. That was it: I'd decided I was going to have breakfast! And then… oh, of course, I had fallen getting up from the table. Stupid sense of balance.

"Bella?"

I blinked, trying to clear my eyes of sleep, and focused on Charlie. "Hi."

Wow, my voice sounded terrible. I still wasn't quite there; when I tried to cough my throat clear, I didn't yet have enough strength to manage it.

"You okay, Bells?"

Once upon a time, I would have just said yeah, sure, but nowadays I took the question more seriously. I closed my eyes again and did a kind of mental inventory. For half a second I got precisely nowhere, and then sensation came flooding back. My whole left side felt bruised. No, forget bruised, it felt like it had been crushed, my hip and ribs in particular. And my head—

As soon as I became aware of it, my head exploded in pain.

"Ow. No. Head," I managed, screwing up my face before realising that stretching the skin like that just made it worse. I couldn't relax, though.

Somewhere beyond the boundaries of my awareness, Charlie was calling for Dr Cullen.

"Bella? Can you tell me about the pain?"

His beautiful voice cut through the pain haze.

"Head. Eight."

I'd done this so many times; I knew that the next two questions were going to be 'where does it hurt?' and 'on a scale of one to ten, how much does it hurt?' so I pre-empted him. Even a doctor as young as Carlisle would have asked those questions enough to understand my answers without actually asking.

I'd never yet said ten, just in case. Sometimes, people said that they couldn't imagine more pain existing than they were currently feeling, but I'd felt enough to know there was always more.

So much for my positive day. I wasn't sure whether it was the meds or the pain that knocked me out first.

* * *

"_Edward…"_

"_No, Carlisle, please don't say anything."_

"_You know I don't want to hurt you. But I think the others have a point about letting her make an informed decision."_

"_How could it be informed with such little time? How could she understand? And even if she could, she's a seventeen year old girl, of course she wants to live. She'd make a hasty decision and then regret it later."_

"_Why are you so sure? She seems to me to be a remarkably self-possessed young lady. I think she knows her own mind."_

"_But we can't know how the idea will affect her."_

"_Knowing isn't everything, Edward. Sometimes, you just need to have faith."_

* * *

The next time I woke up, the first thing I did was check for the pain. Sure enough, there it was, but it was much, much less intense. Like a dull throbbing, maybe only a three or four out of ten. I breathed a sigh of relief, wincing slightly when my ribs protested and opened my eyes to see what had changed.

The light was different, slightly brighter, and I guessed it was getting on afternoon now. It was harder to tell here in Forks than it was in Phoenix. Plus, hospitals were places where sometimes it seemed like there was no day or night at all. The electric lights were always on, always casting that same clinical luminescence over everything.

The next thing I noticed was that Charlie wasn't there. Sitting in his place, with his eyes trained on my face, looking for all the world like it was him in physical pain, was Edward.

I couldn't help it. Despite the pain, despite the setting, despite the terms on which we last parted, I smiled.

"Hey," I breathed.

He tried to smile back. "Hello."

"Are you okay?" I croaked.

He snorted gently. "Should I not be asking you that?"

"I'm used to this," I reminded him. "You only just found out." My voice sounded absolutely pathetic.

"Oh, Bella," he said, and he sounded like he was going to cry.

I'd kind of been intending to claw him out over the mystery of what he was and why he was the only one who didn't want to tell me, but in the face of his distress, how could I?

"Sh," I told him. "I'm not going anywhere today."

"But a week." His voice cracked.

"I know," I said. "Life's not fair, you know?" I half smiled.

He didn't answer; I don't think he could. With a supreme effort – my body, besides being on its last legs, was well and truly drugged up – I moved my right hand closer towards him. He saw the movement and caught my hand with both of his. His skin was cold as ever; I could tell that even though my own circulation wasn't at its best.

"Edward, it's okay," I said, trying to sound soothing and only managing weak.

He looked at me, and I changed tack. "Well, alright, it's not okay. But you've got a whole life ahead of you. You've got to remember that."

He was shaking his head, but he didn't contradict me. As it happened, Dr Cullen appeared at that moment, so he didn't say anything.

"Hello, Bella," the doctor smiled. "You're looking much better than you were this morning."

"Yeah, thank you," I replied, struggling to speak louder.

"How's the pain?" he asked.

"Four in my head, maybe three or two in my hip. I didn't break anything, did I?"

He grimaced apologetically, and Edward looked away. I squeezed his hand gently. Of course, gently was all I could manage.

"You have hairline fractures in your pelvis," Dr Cullen informed me. "Other than that, it's mainly bruising."

"Oh, that's alright," I said, relieved. I could deal with that; I'd had far worse in my klutz's life. "Where's Charlie? I mean my dad?"

Dr Cullen looked down at me, his golden eyes soft and sympathetic. "Your father's gone to get something to eat, but Bella, you should be aware that you probably won't be able to walk on your left leg again."

Edward stroked the inside of my wrist, light as a feather.

"Normally, I would give you crutches for a week or two, but the left side of your chest won't be able to bear your weight for a few days and by that stage—"

"I'll be too weak anyway." I closed my eyes for a second, then admitted: "I think I'd be too weak now, anyway."

"I'm sorry," he apologised.

"It's not your fault. Thank you, Dr Cullen."

"Call me Carlisle," he said suddenly, and from the corner of my eye I saw Edward look up at him. "I hear so much about you at home that it feels like you're already part of the family."

"Carlisle—" Edward began to protest, but he fell silent when his adoptive father looked down at him, not quite sternly.

Not quite because there was compassion there. And it was because I could see that compassion that I kept looking and noticed when the doctor's—when Carlisle's eyebrows rose slightly, like he was asking a question.

What was it Edward had said yesterday? That his father had been thinking some weird things at the hospital.

And then Edward shook his head.

"Okay," I said abruptly. "I know this sounds stupid. And I know you probably wouldn't want me to ask. But can you read minds?"

They stared at me, both of them shocked. But Carlisle was more surprised than Edward, I saw, and neither of them was looking like they'd never considered such a stupid idea. No, they just looked surprised that _I _had come up with this idea. They were probably glad that there was no one else in the room, too.

And then they both spoke at the same time.

"Don't be absurd," said Edward.

"How did you work that out?" asked Carlisle.

I smiled, triumphant, as they looked at each other, both clearly disapproving of what the other had just said.

* * *

"_Rose, why _do_ you want her to be changed? I mean, you always say—"_

"_I know, Em. And I don't want her to be changed, exactly, I just want her to be given the choice. No one asked us, did they? I couldn't ask you, and Carlisle couldn't ask me. And that was the most unfair part. But Edward can ask Bella."_

"_You didn't like her much last week."_

"_Last week she was a perfectly ordinary human girl who would have found out the truth and tattled to all her human friends and family and put us all in danger. And you and Alice and Edward, behaving like she wasn't just another teenage girl."_

"_Hey, you can't insult teenage girls. I'll have you know my wife's in her teens."_

"_You are so ridiculous."_

"_And you love me for it."_

* * *

I'd thought they were about to start arguing, but Edward cut in quickly.

"Charlie's coming back," he warned.

My smile widened into a grin. It seemed he wasn't going to pretend anymore.

"Explain later?" I asked.

He nodded, reluctantly.

The door to the ward swung open, and Charlie hurried back in. He looked relieved upon seeing that I was awake. Awake and not in too much pain. Poor Charlie. He wasn't used to seeing me like this like Renée was. He came to my bedside like he wanted to break into a run!"

"Bells! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Dad," I assured him. "I'm all drugged up."

"'Course you are," Charlie said, throwing a glance at the IV in my left arm. I'd barely noticed it.

"I'm sorry for giving you such a scare," I apologised.

"You should be," he joked half-heartedly. "Thought a bomb had gone off."

"Guess I woke you up," I realised. "Sorry. I was going to let you sleep in."

He rolled his eyes, as did Edward, I noticed. "Bells, I'm glad you woke me up. If you hadn't…"

"Okay, fair point," I conceded.

Carlisle stepped in, then. "Good afternoon," he said formally.

Charlie nodded at him. "Afternoon, Dr Cullen."

"Good afternoon, Chief Swan," Edward said.

Charlie started slightly, like he hadn't noticed that Edward was there. Perhaps he hadn't. I supposed I made a good distraction from the other occupants of the room, from my father's point of view.

"Chief, this is my son, Edward," Carlisle explained. "He and Bella are friends from school."

Friends, I scoffed internally. What a pathetic word to describe whatever it was between Edward and me. Then I noticed that Charlie was looking slightly alarmed, and realised what he would be thinking.

"Dad, it's okay, Edward knows, too."

He frowned, looking between us. "I thought you weren't telling everyone? First Angela…"

I bit my lip, realising how completely out of the loop my dad was. "Uh, yeah, but Emmett—that's Edward's brother—he overheard the school nurse yesterday and it would have been cruel if he was the only one in the family who knew."

That much was true, but it implied that I had then sat down with all of them and told them straight. Would that have been the right thing to do? Maybe, but it had been a Friday afternoon and I wouldn't have seen them all together until Monday lunchtime. Anyway, they had all known by the time Alice had come round in the evening.

"Right," said Charlie, distracting me from my train of thought. "Why were you with the nurse yesterday?"

"Don't worry, Dad, they were just blood-typing in Biology. You know what I'm like."

"I sure do," he muttered.

"Anyway!" I said, though the effect was lost slightly since my voice still had little volume. "Has Dr Cullen told you about the whole walking thing yet?"

"Yeah, he has." His face crumpled. "We'll sort it out."

"I'd like to keep you in for the weekend," Carlisle told me. For a half second I considered protesting, then realised it would be utterly pointless. "We can re-evaluate on Monday."

I stared as he named the day. "I won't be going back to school, will I?"

Carlisle shook his head. "I'm afraid not."

Another ending. No more walking, no more school. No more homework, no more studying. I would never see Mike or Jessica again. I hoped Angela would come visit me.

I walled that away and focused. "Okay. So when I do go home, will I have a wheelchair?"

"Yes," said Carlisle, and then he and Charlie started discussing logistics like sleeping on the couch because I wouldn't be able to get upstairs, and whether I'd need a nurse or a carer or someone while Charlie was at work. I tuned out and just watched Edward, who still hadn't let go of my hand, who looked like he would never be able to let go.

How short my week seemed now.

* * *

"_What's she like, Alice?"_

"_You'd like her. She's about five foot three, with thick brown hair, red tints that catch in the light, a beautiful rich colour. She can't have had chemotherapy because it's long, right down to her waist. Her eyes are brown, too, very pretty. She's pale, but that's to be expected."_

"_And her personality?"_

"_I'm getting there! She's very strong. And self-sacrificing. And I think she has a guilt complex; she keeps worrying about us. This evening she asked if we were mad at her for leading us on."_

"_The poor dear."_

"_I know."_

"_Will he change his mind, Alice? I couldn't bear to see him lose her."_

"_I don't know, Esme. I'm almost tempted to just tell her myself. Rose would do the same."_

"_Wait a few more days, dear. She's his mate."_

"_We don't have a few more days! And if I have to see her funeral one more time… I can't bear it, Esme, I really can't."_

"_I'll talk to him."_

"_You won't change his mind. The only one who could do that is Bella, and she doesn't know to ask."_

"_It will all turn out well in the end."_

"_I'd be happy if I could see that."_

* * *

It was only an hour or so later that my prediction that this would be a good day actually started to come true.

Admittedly, it didn't seem like it at first. Charlie and Edward were both still there, though Carlisle had gone off to tend to other patients, which meant I couldn't quiz Edward on his alleged telepathy, and it was all just slightly awkward. Charlie wasn't exactly a big talker, and everything I wanted to say to Edward would be weird with my dad around. Plus, I could feel the tiny amount of energy I'd gained from drug-induced sleep slipping away.

I was just starting to consider chucking Charlie out by way of telling him to get me something to eat when my good day arrived, in the shape of two people I hadn't seen for years.

"Hey Charlie!" called Billy Black. He was wheeling himself through a door being held open by his son. Although I had barely remembered him before he entered the room, Billy suddenly seemed familiar to me. His voice, rich and slow, threw me right back to my childhood and summers in Forks. He was smiling warmly, the russet skin crinkling merrily at his eyes and I couldn't help but smile too. "Hey Bella," he added upon reaching us.

And then he saw Edward.

I hadn't known it was possible for someone with such dark skin to actually go pale.

Thankfully, Charlie didn't seem to notice. "Oh, hi Billy. Hi Jake. What are you guys doing here?"

It was Jake, Jacob, with whom I'd made mud pies (I knew this only because Charlie had the pictures up in the hall) and whom I didn't recognise at all, who answered.

"Well, we figured that since Bella couldn't come see us, we'd come see her," he announced with an easy smile. He had the sort of face you could only imagine smiling. "I mean, we'd already bought the cakes." He gestured towards a plastic bag on Billy's lap.

Billy tore his eyes away from Edward, though he kept glancing back at him. "It was Jake's idea. He thought you might get lonely up here."

"Thanks," I said. I tried to think of something normal to say. "That's so nice of you. How are you both? How are Rachel and Rebecca?"

"Oh, they're good," Billy said, almost absently, and again he was staring at Edward.

I wasn't really surprised, therefore, when Edward leant forward to whisper in my ear.

"I'd better leave," he said. "I'll be back, though. I love you."

"You too," I said, knowing no one else would have heard what I was echoing.

He stood. "I'm going to head home," he said for Charlie's benefit. "Goodbye, Chief Swan. Goodbye, Bella."

"Bye," I said, trying to keep my voice casual, wondering what on earth that was about.

He left quickly, and Billy visibly relaxed.

"Who was that?" asked Jacob. Unlike his father, he didn't seem to have any adverse reaction to Edward's presence.

"Edward Cullen," I answered. "He's a friend from school."

Was it just my imagination, or did Billy stiffen further when I said the name Cullen?

"Oh, right," Jacob said, and now there was a reaction from him. He glanced at his dad, and he looked… embarrassed? So he knew the reasons behind Billy's odd reaction and didn't agree with them, I deduced.

Hang on. Maybe it was too much to hope for but… did he know what it was Edward didn't want to tell me?

I made up my mind to try to question Jacob further, if I could get him alone. Perhaps I wouldn't have to wait for the Cullens to tell me their secret. Perhaps I could get it from Jacob.

For now, though, I changed the subject. "So, thanks for my truck. It's great."

"You really think so?" Jacob asked, sceptically.

"Sure I do. It saved my life last week."

Well, Alice Cullen saved my life last week, but I couldn't exactly tell them that.

"You mean you were going fast enough to endanger your life?" asked Jake. "I thought it only went up to fifty."

"Nothing wrong with staying under fifty," Charlie said.

"Sure there's not," Jack retorted, but he was smirking.

I laughed. Already I was starting to really like Jacob Black.

* * *

"_They're all against me, Bella. They've been arguing with me all night, ever since Alice caught up to me in the woods._

"_They don't understand. I would love to save you. I would love nothing more than to save your life. But that's not what I would be doing. I'd be killing you, taking away your soul. Surely nothing is worth that._

"_They keep telling me that you'd be giving up your friends, your parents anyway. Should that matter? Should it matter what the alternative is? To condemn you to an eternity of darkness and blood, you, who are so light and innocent! You're so pure, Bella. For me, who has sinned so badly, you are a breath of fresh air. I can't sully you like that._

"_And yet I know I would rather die than go on without you. I've known you only a week, but that doesn't matter. I saw the beginnings of Carlisle and Esme's bond, and of Rosalie and Emmett's. They knew just as soon, just as surely as I do. Perhaps I won't go on without you._

"_But could I do that to my family? I know I could, and I know I would, but will I? If I changed you, it would be all the better for them, but this isn't about them. It's about you._

"_Did you know you're beautiful when you sleep? I miss sleep, so much. If only… but no, if I were human, that wouldn't help you. You would still have only a week more to sleep like this, and to wake, and to eat and drink and live and laugh and love._

"_Oh, Bella. I wish I could tell you everything. But to do that would be to put such pressure on you. With only days left, how could you look objectively at the notion of immortality. You would decide too hastily, and you would regret it. And then you would resent me._

"_Oh, my love. I cannot be without you, but I will not destroy your soul. And so what do I do? In a few hours, you'll wake up and you'll have one less day to live._

"_I cannot. I cannot do it. I will not do it. I will spend these days with you, and then I will join you in death. It's the only right course to take. Right, but in no way easy. I love you."_

* * *

Jacob kept the mini party laughing pretty much single-handedly. Actually, at one point he made me laugh when I had a piece of cake in my mouth (apparently Billy hadn't had much say in deciding what constituted sensible hospital food) and I started to choke. The atmosphere had turned suddenly very tense and a nurse, who had been looking over disapprovingly even though the ward was empty, rushed over to help.

"I'm sorry," Jake said, looking honestly remorseful. But then he spoilt it all with a grin. "Still, would've made a great epitaph: Isabella Swan, killed by cake."

Charlie frowned, but all I did was start snickering again.

"You're so right," I said through my giggles. "Can I have that anyway?"

"Just eat some more cake," he suggested.

"Perhaps not," Charlie overruled.

"Relax, Dad, it's fine," I said, though I did pop another piece of cake into my mouth. I probably wouldn't eat anything the hospital provided. When you didn't have an appetite to begin with, hospital food became a complete waste of space.

Eventually, Billy needed a bathroom break, and Charlie offered to go open doors for him.

"He doesn't need help," Jacob told me as they left. "They're just like little schoolkids who have to go everywhere together."

I laughed yet again. Well, I say laughed—I really didn't have the energy or the ribs for that, so it was more breathy giggling.

"Hey, tell me something," I asked, wondering how long we had alone. The nurse had left a few minutes back. "What was up with your dad when you came in?"

"Oh, that." Jacob rolled his eyes. "It was because of your friend, the Cullen guy. We on the rez don't like the Cullens."

"What, the whole tribe? That's crazy—why?"

He shifted slightly. "I'm not supposed to say. Tribe secrets, you know."

"Oh go on," I said, trying not to sound too desperate. "Who am I going to tell?"

"Good point," he acknowledged. "So. Do you like scary stories?"


End file.
